MONEY MORAL DILEMMA: What's more important - MoneySaving or Santa?

When our son was younger we explained that if Santa bought him a really expensive present, it would mean that a child somewhere in the world would have to have nothing, either because the elves would have to spend too long making his, or Santa wouldn't be able to afford to buy everyone something. Wouldn't he hate it if too many other children were greedy and it meant he got nothing for Christmas that year?

He knew he was bought gifts from the family, but then he also got left his Santa gift in his room for him to open before coming down to the family's gifts.

A 'real' gift from Santa was always something small, and inexpensive, because there are so many children in the world who he wants to give to, and he has so many gifts to fit on his sleigh. We'd then pick something small from his 'Dear Santa' letter for him and leave his present with a special letter from Santa thanking him for not being greedy and saying he was a good boy!

The children who got given the big expensive toys from 'Santa' had actually been given them by their parents, who just liked to pretend they were all from Santa, but only the small special one was really from Santa!

I know how difficult it can be, but we have to cut our cloth accordingly. If we splash out on gifts for our children that we can't really afford, it's no fun for anyone in the New Year when we are faced with bills we struggle or can't pay.

Once our mortgage and the bills are paid, I have less than £50 per week to cover all our food, toiletries, petrol, clothing and any other expenses. I know many families living on less.

it's natural that we want to see our children happy and give them things which we think will do so, but hundreds of pounds spent on credit, on toys or electrical goods, many of which will be broken by the New Year, aren't the real route to happiness for our children.

Over indulging them so that they don't truely appreciate what they have may be creating problems for them when they are older. When they become adults, if they can't afford luxuries they want, and are offered credit, are they really going to stop themselves from getting into debt if they can have what they want immediately?

We have explained to our son that we just can't afford to pay out hundreds of pounds on toys. If we borrow the money we still have to pay it back and give extra money as well. Not giving him doesn't mean that we don't love him, we tell him that every day. We ask him to pick some things he would like up to a certain value and then pick which one we can get. We also explain that when we can give him little treats, might only be 30p for a chocolate bar, we will try.

This has been so very difficult to do, but our son doesn't take anything for granted and always appreciates what he is given, and he is genuinely happy with his Christmas present(s).

I know this is a difficult time for many families and I truely hope that people find solutions to their problems and have a wonderful Christmas.

Loads of love,

Suzyxx

Hi

Why don't they explain to the children that the elves make the toys and Santa delivers but Mum and Dad still have to pay Santa for the presents - and this year the Santa fund is a bit low.

Surely, in the long run, what matters is the time you spend with your kids - they will remember that when they grow up, not who got the highest score on Sonic the plumber or whatever they are playing nowadays!

Think of that advert for Werthers sweets on tv - with the lad telling his dad that his mate has all the latest gadgets etc, but the dad won't be at the school sports day because he is a virtual dad.

Deb