Your browser isn't supported
It looks like you're using an old web browser. To get the most out of the site and to ensure guides display correctly, we suggest upgrading your browser now. Download the latest:

Welcome to the MSE Forums

We're home to a fantastic community of MoneySavers but anyone can post. Please exercise caution & report spam, illegal, offensive or libellous posts/messages: click "report" or email forumteam@.

    • Lsh1975
    • By Lsh1975 14th Feb 18, 3:15 PM
    • 1Posts
    • 0Thanks
    Help please !!!129300;
    • #1
    • 14th Feb 18, 3:15 PM
    Help please !!!129300; 14th Feb 18 at 3:15 PM
    Hi. Please can anyone advise me on this:
    Separated 2 years and no contest divorce going through, 2 children age 12 and 15 in marital shared ownership house.
    I have been paying 220 a week into a bills acc for the marital home every week without fail for the last 2 years and 80 for the kids every week for 2 years without fail.
    Ex wants to stay in house, i simply cant afford to keep this up until my youngest is 18 years old. Currently I'm living with my dad. What if I rented a property?, then I can't afford to still pay half for the marital house.
    30k I have transferred over the last 2 years.
    Ex is a full time student !!.
    Please If anyone can advise I would be so greatfull.
Page 1
    • Kim_13
    • By Kim_13 15th Feb 18, 10:52 PM
    • 1,901 Posts
    • 2,035 Thanks
    • #2
    • 15th Feb 18, 10:52 PM
    • #2
    • 15th Feb 18, 10:52 PM
    Your only legal obligation is to pay child maintenance. The following calculator will allow you to see how much you'd need to pay:

    Try explaining to your ex why you can't sustain the amount you have been, rather than merely stating that you are paying (I suspect) more than you are legally obliged to. Your ex may reduce access unless you can sort this amicably. Sadly the CMS does not prevent the parent with care from reducing contact to get more maintenance.
    Sealed Pot 11 #520 ~ /100
    VSP 2018 #9 ~ 19.55/180.00
    CCCC 2018 #1 ~ 20.75/180.00
    • pearl123
    • By pearl123 15th Feb 18, 11:03 PM
    • 1,374 Posts
    • 2,064 Thanks
    • #3
    • 15th Feb 18, 11:03 PM
    • #3
    • 15th Feb 18, 11:03 PM
    CAB and a solicitor.
    • cheeky-peach
    • By cheeky-peach 18th Feb 18, 11:18 AM
    • 34 Posts
    • 28 Thanks
    • #4
    • 18th Feb 18, 11:18 AM
    • #4
    • 18th Feb 18, 11:18 AM
    If your ex wants to stay there...they will have to pay for it. I hate the expectation some people have!
    • Scorpio33
    • By Scorpio33 20th Feb 18, 11:59 AM
    • 494 Posts
    • 718 Thanks
    • #5
    • 20th Feb 18, 11:59 AM
    • #5
    • 20th Feb 18, 11:59 AM
    You are still liable for the mortgage if your name is on the mortgage.

    Either get her to agree to sell the place or move back in with her.

    Unfortunately unless you agree with her to sell the place, I don't think there is much you can do.
    • TBagpuss
    • By TBagpuss 20th Feb 18, 12:45 PM
    • 6,487 Posts
    • 8,414 Thanks
    • #6
    • 20th Feb 18, 12:45 PM
    • #6
    • 20th Feb 18, 12:45 PM
    You need to see a solicitor who can then advise you based on your specific situation.
    However, the aim in any financial split is to come to a settlement which is fair to both of you, taking into account all the circumstances and the needs of both parties and of the children.
    You have a reasonable need for somewhere to live and to have the children visit, so it is reasonable that you should be able to rent somewhere.
    It would be unusual for you to continue to pay towards bills or a house you are not it. It is more common to contribute to a mortgage in the short term, until a settlement is reached, but not common to do so after an order is made.

    You mention your ex is a student - when does she graduate, and what is her earning capacity likely to be when she does? It may be appropriate for you to pay spousal maintenance a strictly limited time, say 1 - 2 years, but it is likely that the amount would have to be reduced from what you currently pay to allow you to afford somewhere to live, too.

    Is the 220 half the mortgage + 1/2 bills? How much is the mortgage element of that? As a short term measure, it might make sense to look at reducing the amount you pay to 50% of the mortgage payment, paid directly to the lender, and to take your name off all other bills (if it's still on them)
Welcome to our new Forum!

Our aim is to save you money quickly and easily. We hope you like it!

Forum Team Contact us

Live Stats

643Posts Today

5,717Users online

Martin's Twitter
  • It's the start of mini MSE's half term. In order to be the best daddy possible, Im stopping work and going off line?

  • RT @shellsince1982: @MartinSLewis thanx to your email I have just saved myself £222 by taking a SIM only deal for £7.50 a month and keeping?

  • Today's Friday twitter poll: An important question, building on yesterday's important discussions: Which is the best bit of the pizza...

  • Follow Martin