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  • FIRST POST
    • ScarlettTiger
    • By ScarlettTiger 7th Dec 19, 12:16 PM
    • 54Posts
    • 9Thanks
    ScarlettTiger
    Debt letters, but not my debt
    • #1
    • 7th Dec 19, 12:16 PM
    Debt letters, but not my debt 7th Dec 19 at 12:16 PM
    I have been starting to receive debt letters for virgin media. The letters are in my name, but not my address. How can I dispute it?
    I know who has done it, but I know they wonít clear the debt or my name and havenít replied to my messages about it.
    Thanks.
    Last edited by ScarlettTiger; 07-12-2019 at 12:22 PM.
Page 2
    • Smodlet
    • By Smodlet 7th Dec 19, 4:54 PM
    • 5,141 Posts
    • 8,610 Thanks
    Smodlet
    How much is owed on the VM account? Are you able to pay the bill and then charge your guilty family member as if it were a loan?
    Originally posted by Willing2Learn
    If the member (and I use the word advisedly) were willing to pay their own VM bill, surely they would have taken out an account in their own name in the first place.
    What is this life if, sweet wordsmith, we have no time to take the pith?
    Every stew starts with the first onion.
    I took it upon myself to investigate a trifle; it had custard, jelly, soggy sponge things...
    • Silvertabby
    • By Silvertabby 7th Dec 19, 5:41 PM
    • 4,989 Posts
    • 8,156 Thanks
    Silvertabby
    It’s a member of my family, so it’s tricky. Hence them knowing my details. I’ve never lived at the address.
    Originally posted by ScarlettTiger
    Check your credit records - they could have taken out other debt in your name.

    ADD: Looking at your other posts - is this your sister again? If so, then you really need to sort this out now or her debts will always be a millstone around your neck.

    I do sympathise. My own sister had a similar attitude to debt, and just assumed that family members would/could bail her out. She even forged my signature as a guarantor for a hefty loan, which could have been a real headache for me - had it not been for the fact that I could prove that I was in the middle of a 4 month tour of duty in the Falklands on the day that both signatures were signed and dated.
    Last edited by Silvertabby; 07-12-2019 at 6:24 PM.
    • Smodlet
    • By Smodlet 7th Dec 19, 6:50 PM
    • 5,141 Posts
    • 8,610 Thanks
    Smodlet
    OMG. Now I have checked out just a little of your posting history, OP, it seems you have only yourself to blame. If you choose to keep bailing your sister out, you also choose to take the consequences of doing so.

    The day you decide she needs to grow up might just be the day you decide to get out from under her debts. Your choice.
    What is this life if, sweet wordsmith, we have no time to take the pith?
    Every stew starts with the first onion.
    I took it upon myself to investigate a trifle; it had custard, jelly, soggy sponge things...
    • Robisere
    • By Robisere 7th Dec 19, 6:58 PM
    • 3,005 Posts
    • 4,202 Thanks
    Robisere
    If this relative visited your home and stole money from you, would you not report that to the police? There is no difference between that and what happened here. Take action against her, she will just keep doing this.
    I think this job really needs
    a much bigger hammer.
    • DCFC79
    • By DCFC79 7th Dec 19, 7:42 PM
    • 35,600 Posts
    • 22,472 Thanks
    DCFC79
    Whatís a CIFAS
    Originally posted by ScarlettTiger

    Google should give an answer.
    • cymruchris
    • By cymruchris 7th Dec 19, 8:28 PM
    • 213 Posts
    • 140 Thanks
    cymruchris
    As a one-off - and as a family member - you might make an exception, take responsibility for their debt, and tell them never to do it again. Your sister seems to have a persistent problem though - and this approach is likely not to work. You might need to go down the reporting it to the police route - so that the debt passes to her, and she can begin taking responsibility for the problem, it'll probably mean a sour taste in the air for a few weeks - but long term will help resolve the issue I'm sure. You can't go on doing what you're doing.
    An ex-bankrupt on a journey of recovery. Feel free to send me a DM reference credit building credit cards from the usual suspects Happy to help others going through what I've been through!
    • ScarlettTiger
    • By ScarlettTiger 8th Dec 19, 9:18 AM
    • 54 Posts
    • 9 Thanks
    ScarlettTiger
    I know some of you are blaming me for this. But thatís really not helpful. Iím feeling quite low about this. We have no family, having lost our dad and aunt earlier this year(the last members of our family). So I really donít need the finger being pointed. I thought I was doing the right thing in the past by helping her out as we had no one else.
    Inever asked her to do this, and Iím struggling with her being my sister, and her completely abusing my trust.
    I am in contact with Virgin.
    Thank you to all of those that have been understanding and trying to help me. To those that have blamed me, is that really what this forum is about?
    • Sea Shell
    • By Sea Shell 8th Dec 19, 9:59 AM
    • 3,158 Posts
    • 6,315 Thanks
    Sea Shell
    The problem is, is that in the end it boils down to two options.

    1) Walk away from your Sister's financial problems and let her sink or swim on her own. Report any fraud.

    2) Keep helping her out financially.

    You're the only person who can decide which path to take, and if 2) how much of your own financial security are you prepared to risk/give and over what period.
    " That pound I saved yesterday, is a pound I don't have to earn tomorrow " JOB DONE!!
    This should now read "It's time to start digging up those Squirrelled Nuts"!!!
    • robber2
    • By robber2 8th Dec 19, 12:11 PM
    • 454 Posts
    • 404 Thanks
    robber2
    I know some of you are blaming me for this. But that’s really not helpful. I’m feeling quite low about this. We have no family, having lost our dad and aunt earlier this year(the last members of our family). So I really don’t need the finger being pointed. I thought I was doing the right thing in the past by helping her out as we had no one else.
    Inever asked her to do this, and I’m struggling with her being my sister, and her completely abusing my trust.
    I am in contact with Virgin.
    Thank you to all of those that have been understanding and trying to help me. To those that have blamed me, is that really what this forum is about?
    Originally posted by ScarlettTiger

    I don't see any posts blaming you for the fraudulent actions of your sister, just lots of well informed posters trying to help you.

    Sadly as others have suggested there is no easy option for you; either you bail your sister out (again ) or you make her face justice.

    Its good that you are now in contact with Virgin. They will help you decide which of the two options to go for.

    Good luck

    Rob
    • Smodlet
    • By Smodlet 9th Dec 19, 3:31 PM
    • 5,141 Posts
    • 8,610 Thanks
    Smodlet
    I know some of you are blaming me for this. But thatís really not helpful. Iím feeling quite low about this. We have no family, having lost our dad and aunt earlier this year(the last members of our family). So I really donít need the finger being pointed. I thought I was doing the right thing in the past by helping her out as we had no one else.
    Inever asked her to do this, and Iím struggling with her being my sister, and her completely abusing my trust.
    I am in contact with Virgin.
    Thank you to all of those that have been understanding and trying to help me. To those that have blamed me, is that really what this forum is about?
    Originally posted by ScarlettTiger
    OP, how about taking a step back and trying to imagine how you would advise someone else in exactly your position? I find that can help sometimes, whatever the issue.

    No-one is blaming you for your sister's behaviour; they are blaming you for yours: Who else is responsible?

    If you choose to continue to enable her financial abuse of you, her lack of consideration or respect for her own sister, her complete and utter disregard for your financial and emotional well being, who is to blame?

    It really is your choice and yours alone. I know exactly what I would do: Never allow this situation to arise in the first place. You have made a different choice; do you want to persist in it or not? If you do, you have no reason to complain about your choices. If you do not, do something to ensure this abuse does not continue.
    What is this life if, sweet wordsmith, we have no time to take the pith?
    Every stew starts with the first onion.
    I took it upon myself to investigate a trifle; it had custard, jelly, soggy sponge things...
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