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  • FIRST POST
    • bunnymtg
    • By bunnymtg 2nd May 19, 10:18 AM
    • 53Posts
    • 25Thanks
    bunnymtg
    Drowning in huge monthly payments advise please
    • #1
    • 2nd May 19, 10:18 AM
    Drowning in huge monthly payments advise please 2nd May 19 at 10:18 AM
    Hello there

    I am hoping for some sound advice and no bashing pretty please.

    My 4 year old daughter and I left my abusive husband last year. I had relatively high debt at the time because of financial abuse too. My daughter was poorly and to get the treatment she needed we had to go privately. He wouldn't pay this, so I had to. Lots of things like this.

    I didn't have a pot to p*ss in savings wise but I knew I needed to flee. I put EVERYTHING on credit card. Second hand car, rental deposit, furniture. Nothing lavish. Just things we needed.
    Now it is crippling me as 2 of the cards are not 0%.


    Amex: £238 pm (£5724 balance)
    Barclaycard: £171 pm (£7584 balance)
    MBNA: £103 pm (£4,000 balance)
    Omni finance: £26pm (£507 balance)
    Tesco card: £60 pm (£6,013 balance)
    Virgin card: £34.52 (£3,486 balance)

    So this racks up my debt to around £27,000.

    With my rent and bills, my outgoings are £1725.

    Incoming monthly is:
    Universal credit: £1000
    Child benefit: £82
    Part time work : £520
    Child maintenance :£460

    Total of £2,062

    Leaving me with a disposable of £337. However, this disposable has to include fuel, shopping, toiletries etc. I am constantly in my overdraft.

    I would like to add the following: I do not try and live a lifestyle I cannot afford (we live day to day!) I do not go out. I look after my daughter, work, sleep, eat repeat.

    I am coming to the end of my divorce and in 8 weeks I am able to apply for my decree absolute. I will be getting a settlement which means I can clear my debt completely but I wont be seeing that till around September time at the earliest due to court back logs.
    So I need something instant that can alleviate the pressure.

    I cannot sleep at night and I am so stressed wondering if we will keep a roof over our heads!!

    I would also like to add that I have recently moved (nearer to my daughters chosen school) and my electoral details have still not updated on CRA so I cannot find a loan solution or balance transfer option (thats even if I can get anything due to amount of debt).

    I have never missed a payment once, I have no arrears, defaults or CCJs but I just cannot see how much longer I can keep this up.

    I have just had a bill from SSE which I am querying from my last house (final bill) of £500 for just electric!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

    I ideally need a solution that wont effect my credit file/score as I really want to buy a property next year with my divorce settlement and when I go back to work full time after September.

    I know my situation is not as bad as some because I know it will be paid off by the end of the year but living day to day is making me so ill with stress.

    Any advice great fully received.

    BM xx
Page 2
    • bunnymtg
    • By bunnymtg 15th May 19, 9:31 PM
    • 53 Posts
    • 25 Thanks
    bunnymtg
    Slightly ammended!

    Statement of Affairs and Personal Balance Sheet

    Household Information

    Number of adults in household........... 1
    Number of children in household......... 1
    Number of cars owned.................... 1

    Monthly Income Details

    Monthly income after tax................ 520
    Partners monthly income after tax....... 0
    Benefits................................ 1136
    Other income............................ 460
    Total monthly income.................... 2116


    Monthly Expense Details

    Mortgage................................ 0
    Secured/HP loan repayments.............. 0
    Rent.................................... 850
    Management charge (leasehold property).. 0
    Council tax............................. 100
    Electricity............................. 50
    Gas..................................... 0
    Oil..................................... 0
    Water rates............................. 20
    Telephone (land line)................... 0
    Mobile phone............................ 60
    TV Licence.............................. 0
    Satellite/Cable TV...................... 0
    Internet Services....................... 5
    Groceries etc. ......................... 150
    Clothing................................ 0
    Petrol/diesel........................... 80
    Road tax................................ 16
    Car Insurance........................... 0
    Car maintenance (including MOT)......... 10
    Car parking............................. 0
    Other travel............................ 0
    Childcare/nursery....................... 12
    Other child related expenses............ 0
    Medical (prescriptions, dentist etc).... 0
    Pet insurance/vet bills................. 0
    Buildings insurance..................... 0
    Contents insurance...................... 0
    Life assurance ......................... 0
    Other insurance......................... 0
    Presents (birthday, christmas etc)...... 20
    Haircuts................................ 10
    Entertainment........................... 40
    Holiday................................. 0
    Emergency fund.......................... 0
    Total monthly expenses.................. 1423



    Assets

    Cash.................................... 0
    House value (Gross)..................... 0
    Shares and bonds........................ 0
    Car(s).................................. 1000
    Other assets............................ 0
    Total Assets............................ 1000


    No Secured nor Hire Purchase Debts


    Unsecured Debts
    Description....................Debt......Monthly.. .APR
    Tesco..........................5894.79...59....... .0
    Virgin.........................3417.44...34.52.... .0
    Amex...........................6144.09...228...... .0
    MBNA...........................7844.92...131.2.... .0
    Barclaycard....................7734......197.7.... .0
    Halifax........................1150......0........ .0
    Total unsecured debts..........32185.24..650.42....-



    Monthly Budget Summary

    Total monthly income.................... 2,116
    Expenses (including HP & secured debts). 1,423
    Available for debt repayments........... 693
    Monthly UNsecured debt repayments....... 650.42
    Amount left after debt repayments....... 42.58


    Personal Balance Sheet Summary
    Total assets (things you own)........... 1,000
    Total HP & Secured debt................. -0
    Total Unsecured debt.................... -32,185.24
    Net Assets.............................. -31,185.24


    Created using the SOA calculator at www.stoozing.com.
    Reproduced on Moneysavingexpert with permission, using other browser.
    Last edited by bunnymtg; 15-05-2019 at 9:35 PM.
    • bunnymtg
    • By bunnymtg 15th May 19, 9:35 PM
    • 53 Posts
    • 25 Thanks
    bunnymtg
    A couple of thoughts from me in red above.

    You may benefit from keeping a spending diary to see exactly where every penny goes.
    Originally posted by Dobbibill
    Thank you, I have slightly ammended.

    I am getting single persons CT discount over 12 months.
    Mobile phone contract I am unable to move it down a tariff. I took this out when I was still with my husband. I also have unlimited data on it and spotify so I use the data as my internet to watch Netflix.

    I dont have a TV or watch iplayer. I just watch Netflix.

    Car insurance I paid upfront for the year.

    Everything else I have ammended.

    Thank you very much for you pointers, really appreciated x
    • bunnymtg
    • By bunnymtg 15th May 19, 9:36 PM
    • 53 Posts
    • 25 Thanks
    bunnymtg
    Unless I have missed something about someone else paying for things there are a lot of gaps in the SOA.

    There is nothing for food, car insurance - this would be disastrous if you were at fault for an accident, presents, entertainment, car maintenance and haircuts.
    Originally posted by Karonher

    Thank you, these have been ammended.
    • theoretica
    • By theoretica 15th May 19, 10:14 PM
    • 5,849 Posts
    • 7,249 Thanks
    theoretica
    I see two main options - survive on that SOA until you get money from the divorce or sacrifice your credit record to have a less tight budget.


    What are the limits on your cards? Some have a much higher payment as a percentage of the balance, so you might be able to free up a few quid for your cashflow by paying all you can off Amex even if it means increasing Tesco and Virgin.
    But a banker, engaged at enormous expense,
    Had the whole of their cash in his care.
    Lewis Carroll
    • enthusiasticsaver
    • By enthusiasticsaver 15th May 19, 10:41 PM
    • 8,574 Posts
    • 19,913 Thanks
    enthusiasticsaver
    Are all those cards really at 0%?

    You need contents insurance unless it is included in your rent. You should be saving for next years car insurance and £10 a month on car maintenance is a tad unrealistic if the car is only worth £1k. You should also be saving for emergencies. If you have a child having nothing allocated to cloth8ng is also unrealistic.

    Your next step really depends on whether the debts really are at 0% and how sure you are of your settlement and when you will get it. Either struggle on until then or enter some sort of DMP. I think personally that budget is so tight a DMP is the only option.
    Early retired in December 2017

    I'm a Board Guide on the Debt-Free Wannabe, Mortgages and Endowments, Banking and Budgeting boards. I volunteer to help get your forum questions answered and keep the forum running smoothly. Any views are mine and not the official line of moneysavingexpert.com. Pease remember, board guides don't read every post. If you spot an illegal or inappropriate post then please report it to forumteam@moneysavingexpert.com
    • Dobbibill
    • By Dobbibill 16th May 19, 6:10 AM
    • 3,717 Posts
    • 5,010 Thanks
    Dobbibill
    Thank you, I have slightly ammended.


    Car insurance I paid upfront for the year.
    Originally posted by bunnymtg
    Car insurance really should be accounted for on a monthly basis. If this was the month the insurance was due you wouldn't have enough funds for it so you have to ask yourself where did the money come from.

    As other's have said, you have a few options


    1 - Enter a DMP either with Stepchange, National Debtline, another debt charity or self managed. (This will give you the instant relief but will impact your credit report/future mortgage applications.)


    2 - Struggle on as you are, keeping the repayments going until you get the settlement. (This will continue to show payments up to date on your credit report will not be as bad for a future mortgage application as option1)

    3 - Get a 2nd job/do overtime to throw every penny at the debt. (This is not always an easy solution as a single parent with childcare - only you will know if this is possible)

    You need to consider your options carefully as instant relief may cause more damage longer term. What happens if you don't get the settlement in September? If it's delayed in any way, would it impact your decision making?

    All the best.
    Last edited by Dobbibill; 16-05-2019 at 7:09 AM.
    I'm a Board Guide on the Energy, Student Money Saving, UK Armed Forces and
    Local Money Saving - Wales boards. I'm a volunteer to help the boards run smoothly, and I can move and merge posts there.
    Board guides are not moderators and don't read every post. If you spot an abusive or illegal post then please report it to forumteam@moneysavingexpert.com. Any views are mine and not the official line of MoneySavingExpert.com.


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    It's about being better than you were yesterday.
    • Mnd
    • By Mnd 16th May 19, 6:36 AM
    • 1,235 Posts
    • 1,860 Thanks
    Mnd
    Depends on the date that the car insurance is due for renewal, normally I would 100% say yes, car insurance should be budgeted for monthys, but this is special circumstances where the OPs financial circumstances will change massively in September. Then a revised SOA will need to be done reflecting that the debt payments will be gone. Car insurance can be budgeted for then.
    • warby68
    • By warby68 16th May 19, 6:37 AM
    • 1,184 Posts
    • 10,379 Thanks
    warby68
    Could you manage without a car for a short while?

    I'm thinking you could use the sale proceeds to help the debt tick over until your settlement if protecting your credit history is a priority.

    You are quite constrained otherwise as your accommodation costs are pretty high compared to income.
    • bunnymtg
    • By bunnymtg 16th May 19, 10:59 AM
    • 53 Posts
    • 25 Thanks
    bunnymtg
    I see two main options - survive on that SOA until you get money from the divorce or sacrifice your credit record to have a less tight budget.


    What are the limits on your cards? Some have a much higher payment as a percentage of the balance, so you might be able to free up a few quid for your cashflow by paying all you can off Amex even if it means increasing Tesco and Virgin.
    Originally posted by theoretica
    A great idea thank you but they're all maxed out except Tesco and Virgin but they only have about £500 left on each.
    I had 2 hours sleep last night. I just cried and cried and cried....
    • bunnymtg
    • By bunnymtg 16th May 19, 11:02 AM
    • 53 Posts
    • 25 Thanks
    bunnymtg
    Are all those cards really at 0%?

    You need contents insurance unless it is included in your rent. You should be saving for next years car insurance and £10 a month on car maintenance is a tad unrealistic if the car is only worth £1k. You should also be saving for emergencies. If you have a child having nothing allocated to cloth8ng is also unrealistic.

    Your next step really depends on whether the debts really are at 0% and how sure you are of your settlement and when you will get it. Either struggle on until then or enter some sort of DMP. I think personally that budget is so tight a DMP is the only option.
    Originally posted by enthusiasticsaver
    No they aren't all at 0%, some are a mix (bal transfer, cash advance etc)
    My settlement amount is 100%. My ex husband and I have gone to mediation and agreed a sum. The consent order went off to court today. So providing the draft is up to scratch with no errors, hopefully the judge will agree it. There is a 12 week backlog though.
    • bunnymtg
    • By bunnymtg 16th May 19, 11:09 AM
    • 53 Posts
    • 25 Thanks
    bunnymtg
    Could you manage without a car for a short while?

    I'm thinking you could use the sale proceeds to help the debt tick over until your settlement if protecting your credit history is a priority.

    You are quite constrained otherwise as your accommodation costs are pretty high compared to income.
    Originally posted by warby68

    I have thought about it. But I wouldn't be able to get to work or take my daughter to preschool. I work 20 miles away and her pre school is en route and it is rural so no bus route!

    Accommodation is very high agreed. But it is on the lower end for this part of town believe it or not!
    • bunnymtg
    • By bunnymtg 16th May 19, 11:13 AM
    • 53 Posts
    • 25 Thanks
    bunnymtg
    Car insurance really should be accounted for on a monthly basis. If this was the month the insurance was due you wouldn't have enough funds for it so you have to ask yourself where did the money come from.

    As other's have said, you have a few options


    1 - Enter a DMP either with Stepchange, National Debtline, another debt charity or self managed. (This will give you the instant relief but will impact your credit report/future mortgage applications.)


    2 - Struggle on as you are, keeping the repayments going until you get the settlement. (This will continue to show payments up to date on your credit report will not be as bad for a future mortgage application as option1)

    3 - Get a 2nd job/do overtime to throw every penny at the debt. (This is not always an easy solution as a single parent with childcare - only you will know if this is possible)

    You need to consider your options carefully as instant relief may cause more damage longer term. What happens if you don't get the settlement in September? If it's delayed in any way, would it impact your decision making?

    All the best.
    Originally posted by Dobbibill
    Thank you Dobbibill.

    1. Sounds great short term but I could potentially end up with 6 defaults and no mortgage lender would lend on 6 withing 18 months of them being issued.

    2. Seems like the only option but I am robbing Peter to pay Paul. Just had to pay my rent with my cc this month due to an unexpected hefty car maintenance issue.

    3.Would love to do this, I really would. But I would be worse off financially as I can only work up to 16 hours a week.

    If I don't get my settlement in Sept I will have to go on a DMP. I cant carry on. I've been in tears at work all day! My boss has tried to send me home. Ironic thing is I cant afford to go home as I wont get paid!!
    • poppasmurf_bewdley
    • By poppasmurf_bewdley 16th May 19, 11:36 AM
    • 5,473 Posts
    • 5,598 Thanks
    poppasmurf_bewdley
    Is there no possibility of getting an interim payment from your ex?

    It's not the same thing, but following my mother's death, my son was able to get an interim payment from the estate via the solicitor to cover an emergency which cropped up.
    "There are not enough superlatives in the English language to describe a 'Princess Coronation' locomotive in full cry. We shall never see their like again". O S Nock
    • bunnymtg
    • By bunnymtg 16th May 19, 11:39 AM
    • 53 Posts
    • 25 Thanks
    bunnymtg
    Is there no possibility of getting an interim payment from your ex?

    It's not the same thing, but following my mother's death, my son was able to get an interim payment from the estate via the solicitor to cover an emergency which cropped up.
    Originally posted by poppasmurf_bewdley
    I have begged and pleaded with him but he just keeps saying no.
    He is a narcissistic horrible person and just uses the line " no you will have to wait like everyone else does. You shouldn't have racked up so much debt". Makes me so angry. I am in debt because of him!!!!!!!!!!!!!
    • poppasmurf_bewdley
    • By poppasmurf_bewdley 16th May 19, 11:43 AM
    • 5,473 Posts
    • 5,598 Thanks
    poppasmurf_bewdley
    I have begged and pleaded with him but he just keeps saying no.
    He is a narcissistic horrible person and just uses the line " no you will have to wait like everyone else does. You shouldn't have racked up so much debt". Makes me so angry. I am in debt because of him!!!!!!!!!!!!!
    Originally posted by bunnymtg
    Is it not possible to go to court to ask for an interim payment? Maybe ask your solicitor or Citizens Advice about whether this is possible.
    "There are not enough superlatives in the English language to describe a 'Princess Coronation' locomotive in full cry. We shall never see their like again". O S Nock
    • bunnymtg
    • By bunnymtg 16th May 19, 11:51 AM
    • 53 Posts
    • 25 Thanks
    bunnymtg
    Is it not possible to go to court to ask for an interim payment? Maybe ask your solicitor or Citizens Advice about whether this is possible.
    Originally posted by poppasmurf_bewdley
    I have massively delved into this already. I can get a separation agreement but because its not legally binding, he wont do it. He is so controlling and loves the fact I am suffering so much even though I am the mother of his child. It kills me that I cannot provide for her in the way I want to, in the sense that I am watching every penny and have to say no to everything.

    His mother is giving him the settlement money and according to him it is sat in his account waiting to be paid out (his way of making it even worse for me) I am so tempted to just bypass him and ask her for it. But that will make him angry and he could really stir up trouble for me and the whole divorce process.
    • MovingForwards
    • By MovingForwards 16th May 19, 2:42 PM
    • 1,252 Posts
    • 1,524 Thanks
    MovingForwards
    As you are looking to buy a house next year with your partner (as per your post on another thread), can your partner not help you with a bit of money each month until you get your settlement from your husband?

    I assume your partner knows you're struggling and if not you should speak about it as if you're committed to getting a property together you should be committed to help one another at times like this.
    • bunnymtg
    • By bunnymtg 16th May 19, 3:18 PM
    • 53 Posts
    • 25 Thanks
    bunnymtg
    As you are looking to buy a house next year with your partner (as per your post on another thread), can your partner not help you with a bit of money each month until you get your settlement from your husband?

    I assume your partner knows you're struggling and if not you should speak about it as if you're committed to getting a property together you should be committed to help one another at times like this.
    Originally posted by MovingForwards
    He is fully aware as of today. But just says sorry and that he loves me.Pretty lame really.!But then itís also my problem not his.
    • zippygeorgeandben
    • By zippygeorgeandben 16th May 19, 5:52 PM
    • 1,005 Posts
    • 1,394 Thanks
    zippygeorgeandben
    I just wanted to say that even though MSE isn't face to face, you're getting some excellent advice here and support. Look at us as your sounding off board. I don't know what your solution is but, and I know it's hard but you can't change what has happened. Try not to dwindle on the past.
    Regarding childcare, can any other parents pick up? Bring her in?, Have you formed any bonds? Have you contacted any support groups?
    Keep messaging us!
    Savings as of May 2019

    Savings account 1 - £8572.87
    Savings account 2 - £2000.00
    Current account - £6249.30
    Total - £16,822.17
    • humptydumptybits
    • By humptydumptybits 16th May 19, 7:31 PM
    • 2,553 Posts
    • 10,383 Thanks
    humptydumptybits
    Can you ask your mobile phone provider to go on a cheaper package, could be on a temporary basis? Even an extra £40 a month would make things easier. If you are definitely getting the money in September do you need to put money away for presents, can you manage without haircuts? I don't think there is a big saving in there, it is just finding enough bits to get you through. I know it is hard but it isn't forever.



    Have you anything you can sell? Again it might only be bits but bits can add up. I sold my engagement ring once when I desperately needed something for the children, I haven't missed it.


    Good luck, roll on September.
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