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My best friends money worries and my reply....
(Land_of)_Maz
Posts: 11,738 Forumite
Do you think i am MSE on the brain, i think so!
My lovely pal emailed me, i'd been hounding him for weeks as he was distant and uncommunicative and i was worried he wasn't speaking to me.
Anyhow i got an email from him, telling me he was worried about money, borrowing from DD's account to get by at end of each month, and was stressed out at work.
Here's my reply in true MSE style.... do you think i covered everything?!? I didn't want to bamboozle him. but i really want him to come here and meet you lovely peeps and be here, cause he's my best mate and to have him here would be a hoot!
my reply:
My lovely pal emailed me, i'd been hounding him for weeks as he was distant and uncommunicative and i was worried he wasn't speaking to me.
Anyhow i got an email from him, telling me he was worried about money, borrowing from DD's account to get by at end of each month, and was stressed out at work.
Here's my reply in true MSE style.... do you think i covered everything?!? I didn't want to bamboozle him. but i really want him to come here and meet you lovely peeps and be here, cause he's my best mate and to have him here would be a hoot!
my reply:
Well what can i say....... where to begin. I'm glad it is only money worries and work stress as really these are not that important in the great scheme of things!
Righto, firstly as money is my area of expertise, we'll begin there......
Get yourself onto www.moneysavingexpert.com and find some help, go to the forums and go to the section called Debt Free Wanabee, this is where i and all the nice people hang out.... tell them Maz sent you, and they will love you too! Seriously though if you don't want to post, just by reading other peoples stories you will realise that you're not as bad as some people (which is helpful in itself), and seeing what people are doing to raise money/save money/handle creditors/reduce outgoings etc you will learn a lot..... i know you will be able to cut your spending if you address some key areas. Food shopping, sky TV, utilities etc. Trust me i know what i am talking about. If you have any debt, then we need to work out how you can cut these down in the most cost effective way, whether that is shuffling onto 0%'s if you have the credit rating, arranging payment holidays, and most importantly not accruing any more debt. There are even threads about "should i borrow from my kids"
There are tons of ways you can tackle this thing and get it sorted head on..... Are you getting all the benefits/tax credits you're entitled to? If you're paying £300 a month in childcare and are earning less than 50k, then you should be getting something towards the cost, and if you are getting these tax credits taking baby out of the nursery is futile as it will need to be declared and will reduce your income further.... You could ask for the tax credits to be paid weekly instead of monthly, so at least you are getting a little bit each week, six and two threes really as you only have to pay the nursery out of the salaries at month end and are no better off, but getting a £30-40 each week is useful in terms of budgeting etc.
Please go and check out MSE as it is definately the catalyst for me being much more savvy than i ever was. Don't get me wrong, i still have more month than money after i've been paid, but everything gets paid noone goes short, and i supplement my income a little in different ways, so i still have something coming in or a free cinema ticket/swimming voucher so we don't feel utterly deprived for the later part of the month....
I hate to go on about this stuff but i am so postive about the difference that this site has made to my way of thinking and i know you and I think in similar ways so hope it works for you too..... Alternatively i could come round there and charge you for my financial consultancy services, and sort you out!!! (Always looking to make a buck me!)
Re work, well i expect nothing less from that shiite hole of a place. As long as you are willing to do the job, then they will be willing to let you get on with it. time for a chat with boss wifie again?
Love
Maz
xx
Righto, firstly as money is my area of expertise, we'll begin there......
Get yourself onto www.moneysavingexpert.com and find some help, go to the forums and go to the section called Debt Free Wanabee, this is where i and all the nice people hang out.... tell them Maz sent you, and they will love you too! Seriously though if you don't want to post, just by reading other peoples stories you will realise that you're not as bad as some people (which is helpful in itself), and seeing what people are doing to raise money/save money/handle creditors/reduce outgoings etc you will learn a lot..... i know you will be able to cut your spending if you address some key areas. Food shopping, sky TV, utilities etc. Trust me i know what i am talking about. If you have any debt, then we need to work out how you can cut these down in the most cost effective way, whether that is shuffling onto 0%'s if you have the credit rating, arranging payment holidays, and most importantly not accruing any more debt. There are even threads about "should i borrow from my kids"
There are tons of ways you can tackle this thing and get it sorted head on..... Are you getting all the benefits/tax credits you're entitled to? If you're paying £300 a month in childcare and are earning less than 50k, then you should be getting something towards the cost, and if you are getting these tax credits taking baby out of the nursery is futile as it will need to be declared and will reduce your income further.... You could ask for the tax credits to be paid weekly instead of monthly, so at least you are getting a little bit each week, six and two threes really as you only have to pay the nursery out of the salaries at month end and are no better off, but getting a £30-40 each week is useful in terms of budgeting etc.
Please go and check out MSE as it is definately the catalyst for me being much more savvy than i ever was. Don't get me wrong, i still have more month than money after i've been paid, but everything gets paid noone goes short, and i supplement my income a little in different ways, so i still have something coming in or a free cinema ticket/swimming voucher so we don't feel utterly deprived for the later part of the month....
I hate to go on about this stuff but i am so postive about the difference that this site has made to my way of thinking and i know you and I think in similar ways so hope it works for you too..... Alternatively i could come round there and charge you for my financial consultancy services, and sort you out!!! (Always looking to make a buck me!)
Re work, well i expect nothing less from that shiite hole of a place. As long as you are willing to do the job, then they will be willing to let you get on with it. time for a chat with boss wifie again?
Love
Maz
xx
I'm just a seething mass of contradictions....
(it's part of my charm!)
0
Comments
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Bloody Hell Maz that'll have bamboozled him.
I dont think you left out ANYTHING...hehehehe
Charging for your services now are we???
Good on ya I say!:heartpulsOnce a Flylady, always a Flylady:heartpuls0 -
That's really good Maz!
I have told loads of people about this site, but no-one I know ever comes on and has a look! :undecided:
Good for you, I hope he comes on and has a chat with everyone
BSC Member 155 :cool:0 -
Hi maz,
you helped me so much and i'm sure you will help you friend
your a star!:Dtotal -nov07 [strike]£25,526[/strike] jan08 [strike]£23,246[/strike] May08 [STRIKE]£21,171[/STRIKE] June 08 £20,9640 -
Bloody Hell Maz that'll have bamboozled him.
I dont think you left out ANYTHING...hehehehe
Charging for your services now are we???
Good on ya I say!
oh c'mon now! i never even mentioned Quidco!!
(i was tempted!)I'm just a seething mass of contradictions....(it's part of my charm!)0 -
do you think he will listen?:heartpulsOnce a Flylady, always a Flylady:heartpuls0
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Great reply, i am always going on about MSE to my best friend as hes in debt and anyone else that will listen too! I hope he does come here and gets the support that is offered.Now a SAHM trying to earn some spare pennies each month0
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I hope he does too, or i will boot his bum for him...
way back in the day, at the very start of my MSE-ness i was claiming bank charges, i told him to do the same, but nothing.... in the end i wrote the letters for him... he sent them off and the cases were all put on hold.... i was so annoyed cause i'd been at him for months.
So this time i will make sure he's listening. Especially as it's affecting our friendship as he's down and not speaking much. So heaven knows what his wife is going through.
I am good friends with her too, so will get them both on board if i have to....I'm just a seething mass of contradictions....(it's part of my charm!)0 -
you will need to get them both on board i think
it wont upset your friend ship though?:heartpulsOnce a Flylady, always a Flylady:heartpuls0 -
you will need to get them both on board i think
it wont upset your friend ship though?
Nah! if anything it will strengthen things, and give us common interest, well with him at least, but my only worry was if his wife might not appreciate me knowing they are struggling. She would like everyone to think everything was perfect and they were coping.... and might not like that he has told me.......
but they both know how much debt i was in, and they know that this place (and some bank charge refunds) are the reason i am on my way out of debt now.I'm just a seething mass of contradictions....(it's part of my charm!)0 -
thats what I was getting at:cool:Nah! if anything it will strengthen things, and give us common interest, well with him at least, but my only worry was if his wife might not appreciate me knowing they are struggling. She would like everyone to think everything was perfect and they were coping.... and might not like that he has told me.......
but they both know how much debt i was in, and they know that this place (and some bank charge refunds) are the reason i am on my way out of debt now.
I guess you could give him private coaching without her knowing:D:heartpulsOnce a Flylady, always a Flylady:heartpuls0
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