Help me sort out my life please..

TAZ

at least you still have the "fruits" of your spending, as it were. Get all that surplus hi-fi equipment & all those clothes you don't wear listed on e-bay or in the loot. That way you can use whatever you make to pay off some more of your debts

have you checked out this posting on ebay, it sounds a lot like OP ie a 28 year old web designer living at home, and after what i read today if it is the OP then i feel really bad for him.
http://cgi.ebay.co.uk/Everything-I-own-up-for-sale_W0QQitemZ5617762874QQcategoryZ88433QQssPageNameZWDVWQQrdZ1QQcmdZViewItem

but back to the subject in hand, i would get a copy of credit report and see just how much debt is actually still been acreditted to you as some may have gone over the 6 years and been wrote off. plus i had a pretty bad credit history but still managed to get a account with HSBC
hth

black-saturn

I managed to get out of a debt of about £3,000 (not much I know) in about a year. It doesn't sound like much until I tell you that I am a lone parent on benefit getting £120 a week and debt repayments of £40 a week. I did it buy selling anything I didn't need anymore on ebay, even if I only made 99p on it I looked at it as a step closer to being debt free, by only buying what was really really necessary, by making things from scratch in the kitchen and by getting rid of my car. I paid it all off in just over a year and that was about a year ago. Now I have savings of £1,800 (not much until you consider my £120 a week) and am looking forward to booking a holiday in Egypt. It can be done but you have to knuckle down.

taplady

black-saturn wrote:

I managed to get out of a debt of about £3,000 (not much I know) in about a year. It doesn't sound like much until I tell you that I am a lone parent on benefit getting £120 a week and debt repayments of £40 a week. I did it buy selling anything I didn't need anymore on ebay, even if I only made 99p on it I looked at it as a step closer to being debt free, by only buying what was really really necessary, by making things from scratch in the kitchen and by getting rid of my car. I paid it all off in just over a year and that was about a year ago. Now I have savings of £1,800 (not much until you consider my £120 a week) and am looking forward to booking a holiday in Egypt. It can be done but you have to knuckle down.

wow! well done :j could do with a few tips from you !!! :money:

homersimpson_3

1. is mobile phone and internet essential- if not get rid of it or look for cheaper alternatives
2. stop smoking- it will improve your health- save money- stop undermining all work you do in the gym. you could pay 1200 towards repaying debts
3. nice to see change about taxis- buy annual ticket for buses usually cheaper.
4. Gym: £40.00 PCM- why can't you use local authority one or would that be something you wouldn't even consider?
5. Toiletries: £40.00 PCM- why so high?
6. Haircut: £20.00 PCM- female hairdressers are generally more expensive than mens so if you're female this sounds ok. you could get it cheaper at local college - if you're spending £1000 per month on clothes you're likely to be concerned with image and may not even go there.
7. Xmas: £200.00 PA- seems ok.
8. why do you need 2 holidays a year -Winter Holiday: £1000.00 PA & Summer Holiday: £1000.00 PA- some people don't have one. this money should be targeted towards debt. if you need holiday- get a cheaper one, there's plenty around. priorty is debt. you can go on holiday once debts payed.
9. Clothes : £1000.00 PA- ridiculous amount. even if your job requires you dress smartly for work (business suit) you still don't need to spend this amount of money.
10- Books: £150.00 PA- use the library!
7. nice to see some sort of debt repayment of £50- you get some brownie points for this. well done
8. i can quite understand banks not giving you a cheque book- they may (not sure) trust you. having seen the above budget i'm beginning to understand why. you have to prove to them you can and are capable managing money. have you asked why you've been refused? you don't know even know how much debt you have- this is not good money management but the fact you are questioning means you're starting on the road. well done.
9. if you don't understand why you don't have any money at end of month- record everything (yes everything) & set up a spreadsheet- check it from month to month. i can tell you where every penny has gone. just do it for say 2 months and you'll see a pattern emerging. once you find the problem nip it in the bud.
10. if your hobby is djing and that was a 2 grand layout for decks, mixer and records etc- fair enough if that hobby brings in money- in time will this pay for itself?
11. why do you need expensive things around you as a symbol of achievement- you have acheived alot- you're a dj, you seem to have a good full -time job, presumably you have qualifications- if you knuckle down and clear these debts you may even achieve owning property- flat/house etc. you seem to have a materialistic attitude (am i correct?)- if you're physically fit why don't you try to acheive something else e.g. run a marathon, set up a dj school for homeless project centre on the weekend. when i used to work at one the kids adored it and their self esteem was amazing. they used to come in buzzing and wanted so much out of life! the change was amazing- i used to get a buzz just to see the change!-
it won't be easy and sometimes you'll feel like crap, giving up, jealous/resentful of other people but in the end it's worth. the pain is part of the process of you becoming a more responsbile adult & taking control of your life. if you feel like this just post again- there'll be someone who point you in the right direction. good luck !

meanmachine_2

Nicnic, just look at your debts as a job - a project that you have assigned yourself, like others assign you work.

Approach it in a professional and dispassionate manner - almost as if they aren't your debts.

Think of it as a puzzle - sorting out the finances of a total muppet who's made a mess of things, and needs sorting out (that's you by the way).

2 holidays a year - that's ridiculous. Sorry - you don't deserve that time off. You need to punish yourself. I've got money in the bank, but I haven't had a holiday in years - not until I've reached my savings target.

Debt is bad - and you need to feel the full effects of it. That means cutting right back and having a miserable time of it for a few years - that way your brain will connect debt with PAIN and so you will retrain it not to repeat the mistakes of the past.

To be honest it sounds to me like you're a little depressed - you don't sleep much and you buy things to make yourself happier.

Sell your crap on ebay, open up a special account (if possible) and make saving one of your new hobbies. Oh and quit smoking, stop being such a product junkie and take advantage of your unique circumstances. You pay £200 a month! You should be saving AT LEAST £750 a month.

If you're not, then cut back until you are.

Good luck!

ms_london

homersimpson wrote:

4. Gym: £40.00 PCM- why can't you use local authority one or would that be something you wouldn't even consider?

I go to our Local Authority gym, and ok, so it is in London, but its still £46.35!!!!!!!!!!!! (just thought I would throw that into the conversation!!).

NicNic

Its scary. You sound like me pre-lightbulb moment that is, I used to spend spend spend on things, I was very materialistic & very image conscious. £19,000 later.... I decided to run away to Spain and "ignore" my debts, but I eventually come back after a few months to face up to things. Now my debt is down to £750 and will be paid off next month........

You are on a good salary, but you are 28, how long have you been ignoring your debts for? Has it been 5 years? If I were you, I would get in touch with your creditors pronto (you will have some idea of who you owe money too, there's no kidding yourself otherwise!!!), and agree a repayment plan with them. Find out EXACTLY how much you owe, the interest rates and work out a budget from there. I dont think that a budget including your summer & winter holidays, haircuts, clothes, without any hint of a debt repayment (ok, so £50 - wowweeeee!!!) is a budget. Your debts need to come first unfortunately. Sorry if im sounding harsh, but until you make the decision, things will never change.

I am pleased that you pay money towards rent & council tax. Definately stop the taxis, go to bed an hour earlier. The gym I can understand - are you using it to its full advantage?

Repaying debt is tough, but youve got to think about what you want from life. Do you want to be in debt throughout your thirties? Or do you want to be debt free by the time you are 30 (it can be done!!), and then start saving to buy your own property (as you mentioned you would like to do). Being in debt takes away your choices, otherwise the world is your oyster.

I do sympathise with you, really I do. If you had been writing this to me 3 years ago I wouldntve taken a blind bit of notice :0) - but at least you have made the first step by posting on here, well done!!!

Let us know how you get on, you can do it.

Ms_London

skintchick

People have already said everything that I am going to, but I get the feeling you may need to hear it a few times.

I am going to be harsh, so brace yourself...

You take home more than I do. I own a house. I pay ALL the bills myself. I have lived alone since I was 19, and have owned my house for seven years. Your post has seriously p'd me off.

Unless you need the internet for your work, then get rid of it.

You don't need to spend £30 a month on your mobile - I have mine down to under a tenner on Virgin (no line rental) and this month hope to get it under a fiver by writing down every time I text someone to remind myself how unecessary all this texting is.

STOP smoking! I gave up seven years ago so I could buy my house. Paying your debt is a good incentive - just do it!

£25 a month on meals at work?!?!? I currently have my MONTHLY food budget down to £60. Take sandwiches.

You've dealt with the taxis - good. YOU CANNOT AFFORD TAXIS. Stop being so bl**dy lazy, go to bed at a decent time and get up earlier so you can get the bus.

Forty quid a month on toiletries? What are you buying??? For goodness' sake a grip on yourself. I use Clinique moisturiser at £15 a pop and one tube lasts me about six months. I can't understand how you can spend this much every month and you have to stop it.

YOU CANNOT AFFORD HOLIDAYS. I've had one in seven years, yes, just the one, and that was a cheap thing that cost me £300. You have to pay your debt before you buy luxuries.

Ditto clothes. You do not need that many clothes. They're another luxury.

Books - use the library or buy second hand.

Oh, and eighty quid for a night out?!?!?!?!? STOP IT!!! Are you drinking champagne?

I am SOOOOOO angry with you! I'm 30, moved out of home at 19 when I started work, have always supported myself and mostly lived within my means. You have got to wake up and smell the coffee.

Too damn right you need to stand on your own two feet!

Oh, and why have you not been on the electoral roll? Many people in the world live in countries where they can't vote - you have a duty to vote even is it's just to spoil your ballot paper in protest.

Having said all of that (rather forcefully) WELL DONE for posting and we will try and help you, but I think you need to get a grip of your situation and realise that you have to make major adjustments.

dinkylou

Well said skint chick.

Its difficult to hear these things but laziness is not a good enough excuse.

You have to change your attitude to money. Because of this debt you are poor, so that means that you cannot afford all these luxuries. This thought needs to hit home.

No one is going to make this go away, you have to make this your challenge to sort it out.

Stop spending.

System

How much for a hair cut? Blimey, MrJudi pays £6 for his hair cut, and i pay £6 for my 16 year old son every 5 weeks. Can you not find a place who will just give you a dry cut? Its generally cheaper. You really need to lower your standards a bit mate if your serious about sorting out your debt.

Take it from a woman who is used to buy make up from the finest cosmetic houses who has come down a peg or two for the sake of her debt. I can identify with you though.

Skintchick, my hat goes off to you. Well done.

ms_london

Judi wrote:

Take it from a woman who is used to make up from the finest cosmetic houses who has come down a peg or two for the sake of her debt. I can identify with you though.

Haha, me too ;0)

Now im down to Boots own wipes & eye makeup remover pads - needs must :0)