new job and worried sick

mrs_angry

Hi all i need some advice please!

im a 36 year old mother of 4, my oldest child is 17 and has left home, the other 3 children are 5,8 and 10 and all in full time education.

at present i clean in the evenings, bad pay nasty work but get to drop off and pick up kids at school,then i go to work at 5 and get home again at 7.30

a few weeks ago i applied for a full time job as a physiotherapy assistant at our local hospital, i didnt get the job but they said they would consider me for bank work, so i just got my head around that and then 2 days ago they rang and offered me the full time job!

i was very shocked and am in a bit of a quandry, job starts at 8.30am and finishes at 4.45pm monday to friday although i remember her saying at interview that saturdays would soon also be required

i am torn, i want to work and would be about £350 month better off but on the other hand wont be able to drop kids at school or pick them up, that will have to be done by my mother, on the plus the kids will be able to be in their home by 5pm every night with me a prospect they are looking forward to!

i suppose im quite frightened about going to work and juggling the kids and family life, i do have a hubby but he works till 7pm

please advise me, i have to give them an answer but feel depressed about this, is this normal? should i just go for it! am i just feeling this way because it is going to be a big change! any advice please

kind regards in advance

therealdessie

It's always hard going from a situation where you've had a lot of time with the kids to letting go of some of the "rituals" like dropping them at school - but when I was their age my mother was working three jobs to keep us going, and I didn't begrudge her that.

Kids adapt, it's part of growing up And as you say you'll still have quality evening time.

looby75

I would think it is totally normal to be worried and confused about such a massive change. It will be a bit of a shock to the system at first but once you all get into a routine I'm sure all the juggling will be worth it

As for not being to drop off or pick up the kids from school I really wouldn't worry about that too much, you will be home for what I would say is the "quality" time, the evening meal and time before bed, which in your current job you are missing out on. You've already said the kids are looking forward to you being with them every night so it sounds as though they are quite happy for someone else to drop them off at school.

I would say go for it, it sounds like a great opportunity, your kids are growing up fast and you don't know when another job like this will come around. Good luck and congratulations!

lauranurse

Well done on getting the job! Physiotherapy assistant jobs are notoriously hard to get as they have so many physiotherapist wannabes applying to get experience in order for them to get a place on a course. So congratulations you obviously won them over at the interview!

Change is always scary, and I guess you will never know what it would be like unless you take the bull by the horns and go for it! If you hate it you could always reconsider and get another evening job, but on the other hand you might love it! And like you said, you will get to spend the evenings with your family rather than out cleaning.

Only you can decide, but at the very least, make sure you give yourself a pat on the back for getting the job in the first place!

mrs_angry

therealdessie wrote: »

It's always hard going from a situation where you've had a lot of time with the kids to letting go of some of the "rituals" like dropping them at school - but when I was their age my mother was working three jobs to keep us going, and I didn't begrudge her that.

Kids adapt, it's part of growing up And as you say you'll still have quality evening time.

thanks, yes i think your right the kids will adapt, its me that will find it harder! was just thinking about the summer holidays, and school plays etc...i never realised how difficult the transition would be!

i really should just give it a try, and if i totally dont like it whats the worst!

i just really wish that this job was part-time, but you cant have it all ways i suppose!

kind regards

therealdessie

On the upside, there's nothing to stop something part time coming up later, if you still feel the need - right now you're getting vital exposure, experience and the chance to train for a qualification; when those kids are 18 and wanting to go to uni they'll thank you for it

picnic

congrats on getting the job... you should fell very proud as im sure your children and husband are. As the other posters have stated any change is hard but in 6 months time you will wonder what you were worried about.. my children are 12 14 & 22 and i get a lot of help from the eldes (who like your's) has left home. I have been working full time for nearly 7 years now, my youngest was about 5 when i went back to full time work,
and as nice as it was to be home 24/7 for my children i so missed adult conversation and was thrilled when I went back.
Just give the job time and you and your family will be fine...

enjoy the extra cash....

looby75

mrs_angry wrote: »

i just really wish that this job was part-time, but you cant have it all ways i suppose!

kind regards

Try it full time and if in a few months down the line it's too much you could always ask if the position could be made part time. Parents have the legal right to ask for flexible working hours, it's not a guarantee that your request will be granted but if full time is too much for you to cope with then any sane employer will at least seriously consider your request rather than lose you altogether.

Little_Chicken

WOW! I think it sounds like a positive change. These boards are full of people who would love this opportunity. not only will the job give you more self workth (if you need it) but you'll also be improving other people's lives.

I think you are normal to be slightly anxious, but just think of all the new friends you'll make!

mrs_angry

therealdessie wrote: »

On the upside, there's nothing to stop something part time coming up later, if you still feel the need - right now you're getting vital exposure, experience and the chance to train for a qualification; when those kids are 18 and wanting to go to uni they'll thank you for it

Thanks alot all, i know what your saying, i just needed some other views, other than my own! as you say a chance like this doesnt come up that often for a 36 year old! ive got to try or i may end up kicking myself( when im still cleaning loos at 60) and lets face it the kids are growing up fast.

i suppose finding the right balance is the worry!

kind regards

full-time-mum

I'm also a full-time-mum and have been keeping my eye open for work to fit around school hours. I understand exactly how you feel.

From what you have said, you have your child care sorted out. If your mother is happy to do the school run then you really do have the best solution. What about school holidays? Will your mum help there too?

If you are happy that your childcare arrangements are sound then I would say bite the bullet and give it a go. They obviously think you've got what it takes.

What is the worst that will happen? You find you can't manage and resign and wait until the youngest is a bit older and try again. I'm sure that once you start, your confidence will increase and you'll wonder why you ever worried. Just think how wonderful it will be to go and do something for yourself and not just be X's Mum or Y's wife (not to mention the extra money)

Congratulations and Good Luck - let us know what you decide and how it all goes.