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Advise needed in protecting my assets from exsisting relationship

spayne82
Posts: 10 Forumite
I managed to buy my own house last year in which i only owe a small mortgage on.
My new partner moved in with me 6 months ago and we now want to move and get a joint mortgage to buy a larger place to start a family and get married.
He currently pays me rent by cash.
He earns ok money and is very good with his money (never had debt etc) but has no deposit for the new house although he is saving money per month but it will never get more than a couple of grand.
I will be paying around 60% upfront for the new house with the rest being shared per month over a joint mortgage.
We will split all bills and mortgage payments 50/50.
As i will be paying a large deposit for the house, I need to protect my money incase anything happens in the future.
I did mentioned a pre-nup a few months ago but he was hurt by this as he thought i didn't trust him.
He is not a money grabbing person and I do trust him but you never know what happens in the future.
How do i approach the subject without hurting him and what legal document can i have drawn up to protect my large deposit on the new house??
Is there something i can tie in with a will incase one of us dies etc?
I really appreciate some advise as i dont know what to do, thank you.
My new partner moved in with me 6 months ago and we now want to move and get a joint mortgage to buy a larger place to start a family and get married.
He currently pays me rent by cash.
He earns ok money and is very good with his money (never had debt etc) but has no deposit for the new house although he is saving money per month but it will never get more than a couple of grand.
I will be paying around 60% upfront for the new house with the rest being shared per month over a joint mortgage.
We will split all bills and mortgage payments 50/50.
As i will be paying a large deposit for the house, I need to protect my money incase anything happens in the future.
I did mentioned a pre-nup a few months ago but he was hurt by this as he thought i didn't trust him.
He is not a money grabbing person and I do trust him but you never know what happens in the future.
How do i approach the subject without hurting him and what legal document can i have drawn up to protect my large deposit on the new house??
Is there something i can tie in with a will incase one of us dies etc?
I really appreciate some advise as i dont know what to do, thank you.
0
Comments
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You need to see a solicitor and get a contract written up stating that you own 80% of the house (60% deposit, then 20% of the half you're paying on), and he owns 20%, and that in the event of separation, the equity would be split to these ratios after all debts have been paid.Should've = Should HAVE (not 'of')
Would've = Would HAVE (not 'of')
No, I am not perfect, but yes I do judge people on their use of basic English language. If you didn't know the above, then learn it! (If English is your second language, then you are forgiven!)0 -
Pink Shoes is right. You need to be tenants in common (legal phrase) so that your contribution to the property purchase is protected. If he's worth marrying I am sure that he will understand and in practical terms it will make no difference unless you split up.
A friend of my daughter's did this. Bought a house with totally unsuitable boyf when she was about 21, using a large legacy from her grandmother as a substantial deposit. When they (inevitably) split up, she got all her money back and has now used it for purchase of house with entirely suitable fianc!.
Don't be afraid to discuss this - after all, if you're close enough to be talking about getting married and having children, you should be able to talk about money.
Mrs P P"Keep your dreams as clean as silver..." John Stewart (1939-2008)0 -
Thanks guys, i really appreciate it x0
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Yes, he shouldn't be hurt by a pre-nup, because at the end of the day, it's just simplifying things should you decide to separate, and prevents any lengthy legal battles! I have the same with my OH, as my part of the deposit was over double his!
Financial compatibility is SO important in relationships, and if you can't discuss your finances openly and honestly, then you certainly should be talking about marriage and babies!!Should've = Should HAVE (not 'of')
Would've = Would HAVE (not 'of')
No, I am not perfect, but yes I do judge people on their use of basic English language. If you didn't know the above, then learn it! (If English is your second language, then you are forgiven!)0 -
Is this a document that is drawn up by the conveyancer? Or is the tenants in common thing totally separate from the conveyancing process?
I'm also going to be doing this soon and will be using my house sale money as deposit for next house (about £170,000) with my OH taking out a mortgage in his sole name to top up to the price of the next house (about £100,000)
Thanks0 -
i would be hurt personally....
myself and partner each owned our own house, she had 15k equity post sale, i had 75k.... we're in as joint owners and plan to get married soon. what a way to start a marriage / life together. whatever happened to whats yours is mine etc etc...
at the end of the day you say you trust you partner... you obviously dont (or have reason to think you may not in the future). The only way it'll end in tears is if one of you try to screw the other over.
Before i get jumped on, i'll add that i previously owned a joint house in which i paid for almost entirely (5-6 years ago - we jumped in faaaaar too soon).
We eventually went our seperate ways and did the adult thing of sorting out a fair deal between ourselves.
@something girl - why on earth would you not go on the mortgage...0 -
No point in a Pre-nup agreement anyway as I'm sure they're not legally enforcable in the UK. Tenants in common is the way to go if you don't trust him. When I met my wife we both had our own places but she had less equity in hers than me and she moved into my hosue. I never thought about doing anything like this.It's my problem, it's my problem
If I feel the need to hide
And it's my problem if I have no friends
And feel I want to die0 -
TighterThanTwoCoatsOfPain wrote: »i would be hurt personally....
myself and partner each owned our own house, she had 15k equity post sale, i had 75k.... we're in as joint owners and plan to get married soon. what a way to start a marriage / life together. whatever happened to whats yours is mine etc etc...
at the end of the day you say you trust you partner... you obviously dont (or have reason to think you may not in the future). The only way it'll end in tears is if one of you try to screw the other over.
Before i get jumped on, i'll add that i previously owned a joint house in which i paid for almost entirely (5-6 years ago - we jumped in faaaaar too soon).
We eventually went our seperate ways and did the adult thing of sorting out a fair deal between ourselves.
@something girl - why on earth would you not go on the mortgage...
well the mortgage would have nothing to do with me, as I'm not the one needing to borrow any money? We're intending on moving further south, where houses are double the price. I own my house outright and have 2 young children. I have no debt, I have no mortgage.
I would always want to protect my assets, pre my current relationship, as I have children. Just as my current partner would be leaving his share of whatever he has, to his own children.
Once divorced peopled get together, but are not married or plan on having children together, surely it's just common sense, that they will look after their own finances?0 -
oh and just to add... 'what's mine is yours, vice versa etc etc' is fine, if there are similar assets, no children etc...
everything changes if that is not the case.0 -
The tenants in common will need to be sorted by your conveyencing solicitors. They should basically get you to sign a declaration of trust.
You are very wise to do this. My ex & I split up a month ago and i put in most of the equity. Without the declaration, she'd have taken me to the cleaners. It cost me I think £300 but it was probably the best £300 I've spent.
If you die, you can leave your "share" to anyone you please in the will.0
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