coming clean to Partner - now wants me off mortgage.

debtmuncher

lots of hugs...chin up.

when you say he is a nightmare with money what did you mean exactly...poor guy with the history he had with the ex. seems hes totally frightenend of history repeating itself.

hope you both manage to resolve things

cat4772

Hi Liz

Just wanted to say chin up and hope it settles soon. Please don't make any decisions that affect your home without getting expert legal advice first!

Cat.x

mrskingandthescarecrow

Stick to your guns.

I'm sorry but I can't imagine a household where one adult can spend £10k without the other knowing about.

Ask yourself what the money was spent on and unless you've got 400 pairs of shoes hidden in the attic or a car you park around the corner so he doesn't see it then I expect the money was spent on the household. It's amazing how it soon adds up - new school shoes, car repairs. I'm quite certain that a good % has gone into the household pot so why should your name come off the mortgage just because you have (both) run up a few debts?

My husband thinks we have a bottom-less bank account and drives me mad with questions and comments like 'which card should I swipe?' and 'well I need it'. Unprisingly we have 60k of debt.

boredofbeingathome

He is already financially linked with you, if you have anything jointly owned. You are also entitled to half of the equity in property, and would probably need both wages to afford mortgage on application.
My OH told me about his debts this time last year, and it hasn't been easy, but then again, i am not perfect either and i don't self justify things.
Yep I was angry, but then again i also know that he is a hard worker who only wants the best for his family...i can see both sides and have to say it would not be my first thought booting him off the mortgage.
He has to be realistic and you both have to decide your priorities on this.If you are looking for another deal and it is viable to add the debt on, then do your sums carefully, bearing in mind it will take longer to clear. Look at the snowball calculator and see if it is worth it.
Also if he was in the same situation, would you be saying the same to him? He needs to think carefully about that, and also about his child. I have known a few folk who have walked away from houses, signed it over to ex, thinking children would at least get a share and a big fat nothing at the end of it all.
Good luck with it all BOB x