Messy house: where do I start?

cat64

squishyclaire wrote: »

Thank you all so much for your tips, and more so your support in doing this. Sometimes I feel such a failure because I just an incapable of keeping my house tidy- everyone else I know seems to be able to do it. I do i know just need to be ruthless and get rid of stuff that has no purpose in my house and it isn't worth fall out with my oh about some old tat that just needs going. I have new gusto to put some stuff on ebay, freecycle and car boot. In fact going to freecycle some stuff now. thanks again xxx

Hi Claire, I sooo know where you're coming from! 'Sometimes I feel such a failure because I am just incapable of keeping my house tidy - everyone else I know seems to be able to do it'. Well Im definitely not:rotfl:but I know exactly what you mean, none of my friends seem to live in anything approaching the chaos that we do and I often feel they must think I'm lazy but honestly most of the day I'm running around like a headless chicken - I just never seem to make a dent in the mess.

Im in a right strop this afternoon 'coz I wanted to start sewing a bag that someone kindly linked instructions too and there is absolutely no clear surface where I can set up my sewing machine for a few hours. I did start trying to clear the kitchen table but honestly there was so much c*** on it that I just gave up after a few minutes:o - its the not knowing what to do with stuff that gets me.

Anyway, just wanted to offer you moral support - hope it helps a little knowing you're not alone x

pigpen

As current leader of the flylady thread.. you can come of your own accord or we can drag you kicking and screaming.. either way you'll probably still do more than me lol

I think we are all a bit.. unmotivated when it comes to mopping and tidying and housework.. I hate it.. I can do the cooking and the laundry and the toilet cleaning but when it comes to the big stuff.. like picking stuff up and actual tidying I'd rather chew off my own limbs.. flylady thread really does help.. honest... there is always the promise of a dog biscuit as well!

merlinormartin

There is a saying .."Organised people are just to lazy to look for things!" ..:rotfl: ... Good Luck with the declutter!

Nix143

Argh, where do you begin? Well I am not the world's tidiest person and when faced with a whole house that needs a good de-clutter, clean and decorate then it just looks like a mountain you can't possibly climb.

And it's a bit like dieting I reckon, you *know* there are a myriad reasons why you should do it but unless your head space is right then you can tell yourself to Fly or Ebay as much as you want and it won't happen.

I'm kind of in the middle of this one. Never been a tidy person, always saved too much junk, shoved things in drawers just in case. So few weeks ago I set myself a task - just one room. That's all I had to do. But I had to do it properly. So everything came out and nothing went back in that hadn't been used for a certain amount of time. And then to deal with the fact I am a messy person by nature I imposed a really strict system. Every drawer, wardrobe, cupboard, space has a specific storage use - so vests in one drawer, short sleeved t-shirts in another etc etc. It has meant that even if the bedroom gets untidy over a couple of days it only takes half an hour to restore it to how it should be. I know that as long as I don't bring anything into the room that doesn't 'live' there then I'm fine. And if things do migrate there then its easy to identify them and get rid again...........currently to another area of the house.

Hopefully as I go around the house doing this in one room to the next I'll end up with a solution that aids me. I have an awful memory, I hoard, I hate tidying. But that little bit of structure I have created means its easy to pull it back. Its only one room so far but I always see it as one room more than there was, rather than *just* one room.


I've got a pile of stuff waiting in the hallway to go on Freecycle, a pile in spare bedroom waiting to be Ebayed, a garage and an attic completely full of stuff to sort. But for some of us this isn't just about being tidy, it's about creating new patterns of behaviour, letting go of old habits, trying to create a new and different way to live. I have at least £1000 worth of stuff sat waiting to go on Ebay, but my motivation isn't there right now to list it. How mad is that? All that 'money' sat ready and waiting. In lots of ways I have given up trying to understand why I don't do the things I should.


I love reading the de-clutter thread, go there and see what everyone else is dealing with. It is inspirational. There are a couple of people on there who really have my admiration. And it keeps you focused. You won't get everything done in one go, you will stop from time to time, you'll lapse. But always look on what you HAVE done rather than kick yourself for what you haven't.

And get into the habit of YAYing yourself no matter how small the achievement. If you put one thing in the bin it is one thing less you have to deal with. If you put one book back on a shelf then its one thing less to do. it is so hard when you have a mountain to climb to not get discouraged so it really helps if you look at it in terms of acheivement. Don't measure yourself against anyone else or their house. That way lies disaster. Focus on you, all the little positive steps that you can take to make your house how you want it. It'll take time and you might never get there completely but you'd be amazed how far teeny sized steps can take you.


Good luck, sorry for rambling, this is something I have been thinking about a lot lately xx

ceridwen

merlinormartin wrote: »

There is a saying .."Organised people are just to lazy to look for things!" ..:rotfl: ... Good Luck with the declutter!

And speaking as a basically organised person (if you overlook the paperwork that is - and I DO have concertina files for the important "keeper" bits of paper) - how true!
Yep - correct - got that in one - I'm either too lazy or too busy to keep hunting for things - hence knowing exactly what I have and where it is. Keeps me sane that way;)

I can relate to the idea of keeping things in case - because of wondering if it might "come in handy" as being associated with being on a low income for long periods of time. I have always ever only had a low income - so I do know where you are coming from on that one. The phrase "feel the fear and do it anyway" comes to mind here.

zarazara

squishyclaire please goto Flylady web site. it has transformed my home and my life. truely. i cannot praise it enough , just wonderfull. join in and get daily emails. its totally fantastic.
now, go shine your sink.

zarazara

its https://www.flylady.net

zarazara

http://www.flylady.net/join.asp

[Deleted User]

Follow all the advice above.

When you don't seem to be getting anywhere:-

Pick 10 objects up and throw them away/recycle them.

I don't like throwing things out, but if you really are in a tip you have to let things go. Sounds ruthless but when you get in the habit of doing it everyday it really does keep the clutter down.


Vary the process:-
Put 10 things away.

You'll feel better because you'll know you've taken a small step everyday and you can measure your success. It is small steps everyday that lead to success, not once monthly massive cleaning and decluttering attacks.

Sometimes tidying up and keeping things clean seems never ending and the problem is sometimes you just can't see where you've been!

I know I'm looking at my office desk at home having just done 14 hours of work!!!!!

Time to put 10 things in the recycling box!!

Good luck and don't let it get you down.

sillyvixen

i recentally took a week of work and decluttered - i started with the spare room and totally decluttered it and created space (from a crowded room with a small pathway through to the linen cupboard) this was the worst room and took a bout 6 hours to sort and clean. after that i set about the other rooms it was hard work but now i have a clean and tidy house it takes less effort to keep looking decent - leaving more time for the important things. i have done things like have a nice box next to the telephone to put letters etc in and make an effort to file them every few weeks, put all the toiletries cleaning stuff in plastic coordinating baskets in the bathroom - this makes it look better but also makes it easier to move to clean shelves etc, pot items in the linen cupboard in clear stacking boxes - so i can easily get to the box i want and not cause an averlanch because i want somthing at the bottom of the pile and has also freed up space for other things to be stored, all my bogoff toiletry items have been put into my vanity case - it takes up space in the wardrobe it may as well be full. as well as clearing the clutter and putting all my books that have been in boxes since i moved here 18 months ago on a bookcase i couldnt get to and filling a filing cabinate that was empty an inaccesable. i have also taken the casters of a metal 2 tier trolly (destined for the tip) and put it in the cupboard to provide extra storage.

hard work but it was worth it!!