Don't know what to do

faeriequeen

Today, 4:57 PM #19 faeriequeen vbmenu_register("postmenu_9784845", true);
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Join Date: Mar 2008
Post Count: 9
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Called into OR's office today to hand in 2 forms that they needed signing before my telephone interview on Wednesday-I felt nervous enough just doing that!
Anyway, I'll obviously just have to wait to see what happens on Wednesday but wondered if anyone had any thoughts on my dilemna as far as my property is concerned, as I really can't think clearly about it.
It would appear that the house is either in negative or else very little equity so I imagine there might be the opportunity for a third party to buy the beneficial interest in it. Up until now, that's what I have hoped would be the case for my daughter and myself(there's just the 2 of us living there).
The dilemna is that my current mortgage payment is very high £800-and virtually eats up most of my salary(I get paid on an hourly basis and the number of hours varies from month to month-however, the average is only£1050). Up until last October, I earned about £650-£700 more than this per month which obviously made a big difference.
A number of really difficult personal and work-related circumstances at that time meant that I terminated the part of my contract that paid me the £650-£700, even though I made the decision at a time when my judgment was really badly affected and I was clinically depressed. ( I subsequently asked if I could have the hours back because I had made the decision at a time of extreme stress and was receiving counselling as well as treatment from my GP at the time, but was told that it was then too late because everything had been processed).
As it is now, I hope that at some point in the not too distant future, my health will have improved sufficiently so that I may be in a position to supplement my income or else find alternative employment altogether but I obviously can't know when that may happen.
So-I'm left to decide whether I should try to hold on to the house and live on less than a shoe string(if the OR allows it, obviously),in the hope that my financial situation will improve in the relatively near future so that the mortgage payments become less onerous, or else should I let it all go and look for rented accommodation or else try and be considered for social housing? With the private rented option, there is also the question of bonds, rent in advance (I would not be able to afford these costs)and rental costs of at least £550 or more.
I am thinking that perhaps, even if I ultimately have to sell the house, then I might get at least something from it-since the main reason for the bankruptcy has stemmed from disastrous involvement with people doing work to my property, I just think it will have been all completely wasted if I also then end up my losing my home). On the other hand, I wonder how will I manage to carry on with that mortgage payment in the short term, given that as it is now, I will not be in receipt of holiday pay either, due to the change in my contract.
Am I flogging a dead horse, I wonder ,or should I risk things changing for the better as far as work is concerned?
I am aware that, if I indicate that someone wants to buy the beneficial interest in the property, then any shortfall that accrues further down the line will be my responsibility-do I have to tell the OR now what my intentions are, at the time of my interview as far as buying the B I is concerned?
I'm sorry this is so rambling-as you will see, my thinking is really cluttered at the moment. Any thoughts or advice would be really welcome.x

Persolv0

Hello Faeriequeen
I cant advise you on what to do but some thoughts are..
From what i understand your mortgage is 800 pounds out of an average 1050 which obviously only leaves 250 pcm which cant cover your neccessary monthly spend.

My initial thought if it was me would be to let the house go and somehow!!find the additional money to pay an advanced rent(i know that is easier said than done and its one of my issues just now also)

I did wonder if taking in a lodger was a possible part solution at least until you feel well enough to take steps to up your income again? and also as to whether you have sought advice on any benefits you may be entitled to that your not already claiming?

Im unmoveable on my opinion that health must always come before finances so although i can fully understand you being reluctant to letting the house go i would most definately recommend that after you receive and weigh up advice that puts you into a stronger financial position not to get bogged down by how you feel about the house but what is best for you...your daughter and your health in the short mediium and long term.

Hope this helps a little but i do see your dilemma

good luck and best wishes

skylight

I can agree. Family and health are way up on the priorities list for me these days.
Personally, I cannot see the UK fascination with having to own their own homes.


Most important thing to consider:
What happens to your finances with another interest rate increase? Work out everything from a qtr percent up to 2 percent. If you are on a fixed mortgage rate, work out what will happen if you lost that fixed rate today?

Are you claiming child tax credits too? If not, do so today! Maintenance payments? - Do you get on with daughters Dad? Is there any chance of help with the deposit to move? Lodger? New job (if possible)?

If you ultimately keep and want to sell the house later on, what do you think you are going to get out of it? You think there is little equity anyway, less estate agents/solicitors fees etc you are unlikely to come out with much in this current climate.

I know its a touch decision to make and I do not envy you at all. Only you can decide what you mean by distant future being well enough. Do you mean a month or two or could it mean a year?? Be honest with yourself.

Waspeze

Just out of interest have you looked at how much two bedroomed houses are to rent in your area? I only say this as it might be about the same as the mortgage you pay (obviously renting you don't have to pay repairs etc)... down here I pay 625 for a fairly small one bedroomed flat so 800 for a two bedroomed house is reasonable. I do realise that it is a big chunk of your wages though!

faeriequeen

Thanks for your thoughts Persolv0,skylight and Waspeze-it has been really helpful to get some other perspectives on things.
Did make me realise too that, ultimately, the most important thing is health and family(my daughter) and having at least a basic quality of life to afford to put food on the table. For quite some time now, every month has been like purgatory in that regard-can't even afford to meet a friend for a coffee, forget going out at all, no money for petrol for more than half the time etc etc.
My daughter is actually 18 now but still living at home-she has just started a mental health nursing course-obviously, I don't receive any benefits for her now and have hardly ever received anything in terms of maintenance since my divorce 13 years ago.
Although I get on ok with my daughter's father, he wouldn't help in any way as far as a deposit for a rented house is concerned.
I have thought about a lodger too-but the house only has 2 bedrooms and it wouldn't really be feasible as things are.
I take the pont too about it being unlikely that there would be much to realise financially if I did hold on to the house now and sold it later-I think it's more about the house having represented some other kind of security and also that the builders who made our lives so unbearable for over a year would seem to have taken virtually everything (I don't mean that I'm not responsible for making stupid decisions and allowing things to spiral out of control but the whole experience was really terrible and my daaughter and myself ended up feeling that it was their house and not ours-we would come home and the two people concerned would be there not even acknowledging us, hostile, intimidating etc-just asking for money all the time).
Anyway, I'm hoping that things will become clearer to me-I did ring two social housing organisations today as well and have arranged a visit from 1 and an application form from the other-so I'm going to try and keep my options open for now.
In my OR interview tomorrow, do you think it's ok to ask if I have to confirm my interest in the Beneficial Interest immediately or if I can have a little more time to consider? She might, of course, have made her own decision about the house.
Thanks again

faeriequeen

Forgot to say, Waspeze- average rental costs for 2 bedroomed properties around here seem to be in the region of £550-£650 a month, sometimes a bit more

Persolv0

Hello again
Sounds as if you had a horrible experience with the builders....any room too complain about them ?(Im being mercenary and wondering if theres a compensation claim in there somewhere?)

I really cant advise too much as my knowledge of benefits etc are very limited but on your current salary would you not be entitled to help with rent payments(that you cant get for your own house?)

Sometimes its hard to detach the emotional factors from the cold hard financial factors in weighing up our options but i wish you the best of luck and spend a day or so in gathering the advice then you ll feel much better when you have a plan of action

good wishes

faeriequeen

Thank -you for that Persolv0-you've been very kind to take the time to share some thoughts.
As far as the builders are concerned(actually it's a male and female who called themselves architects but who actually ended up doing a lot of the work at my house since the two people they "employed"as builders had serious drug and other problems, were sacked , after which my house was burgled in what would seem an act of "revenge", given that the only items taken were the "architect's" tools), there has been an ongoing dispute with them since they eventually left my property in November '06-they were actually suing me for more money even though the common consensus from a variety of tradesmen and surveyors is that I was completely ripped off by tens of thousands of pounds -notwithstanding the bullying and the constant pressurising for money etc. Having had my interview with the OR'S office today, it would seem that the court case will not go ahead now , even though I was disputing the claim and making a counterclaim. I was told that I could not continue to represent myself (I couldn't afford to continue to pay the solicitor fees)since I am now bankrupt.
On the subject of the interview, I was on the phone for about an hour and a half and it felt like an ordeal to be honest-probably the fact that I was so anxious coloured the whole experience.
I felt at the end of it, that I still hadn't managed to really tell the story of how a large number of factors had led me to bankruptcy-I was left feeling that it seemed that I had wanted some fancy house and had been reckless in trying to achieve it-whereas, actually, my daughter and myself had lived for over 10 years in a house that was sub-standard in all ways-freezing cold, things falling apart, broken furniture and all the rest of it. When I started work after going to university in my 30's, getting a degree and other qualifications, I only wanted to make thing at least decent for my daughter-the interview just concentrated on figures and times and the attempts too give some history to it all seemed to be excuses-no comment was made at all and things were redirected to the figures involved.
Sorry to go on again-but thanks ever so much for your support x

So_Sad_Angel

Hi Faeriequeen

Firstly thankyou for your well written posts. I can identify with some of your issues being in a position where OH & I have been crippled financially by the renovation of a property. Now have no equity & OH is going BR & we have to decide about handing back keys & going to rented. I feel that it has been so much work & then all for nothing really. But so many on this board have reminded me that its those closest to you that count not bricks & mortar...in fact its the bricks & mortar that caused the situation!!

You need to look at rental market place & do new budget planner on new expenses assuming you are in rented. See how this will affect your position. Everyone needs a decent quality of life & after all you `ve been through you need to consider if this is the way you want it to be for the forseeable. Also consider what happens if base rate increases as everything is going up..how would you cope?

Is it viable to cease mtge payments & use towards rent? I`m sure someone will answer that question.

You`re doing great getting this far.Keep us up to date.

Angelxx

faeriequeen

Your message was very much appreciated Angel-I can identify very strongly with the situation you describe and some of the emotions that go with it. I think what you say about having to get past the feeling that "it has all been for nothing", is right-and sometimes difficult, depending on how able you are to cultivate and sustain a positive frame of mind-especially at the beginning of the process anyway.
As well as that,in my own case, I keep having these shock waves going over me of how I could have been foolish enough to let the situation with the house happen, why I didn't bail out earlier, whether the two people concerned were bullying, pressurising, manipulative or whatever. It's just hard to think what it's all come to-is that something you can identify with too? As you say, negative equity, bankruptcy-the whole scenario!
I hope I don't sound too self-indulgent-I know it's bricks and mortar at the end of the day and I know that people find themselves in much worse situations-I think that maybe it's a process of adjustment after the reality of things actually sinks in and a queston of prioritising what is truly important, as you said.
I'm not generally a miserable old pessimist, I don't think, but I hope I don't sound like one, either!
One thing that did make me smile yesterday-I was chatting to a friend about how foolish I felt and so on and he said that I should start thinking of myself as part of the Aristocracy given the number of aristocrats that had effectively bankrupted themselves through a particular obsession with a renovation project. Now, I know the "properties" we are talking about there, are not generally in the same league as a 3 bedroomed semi-detached with no off road parking (that has now become 2 bedroomed, still with no off road parking!)) but my friend did remind me of my insistence on using sheeps wool insulation (he exaggerated and said that it was probably only Carmarthenshire sheeps wool that fitted the bill!). Whether that allies me to the aristocracy or not is doubtful, I think, and I don't mean to sound flippant about things. However, given that I was in floods of tears at the time and intent on my own character assassination-the humour definitely helped!
Hope you are doing ok with all the adjustment process, Angel-I send you every good wish with it all.
I shall keep in touch-if you can tolerate any more of these epistles-no wonder my telephone interview was so long! x

Persolv0

faeriequeen wrote: »

I shall keep in touch-if you can tolerate any more of these epistles-no wonder my telephone interview was so long! x

Hello
Huh you call that a long post:rolleyes:as Angel will confirm my short!!! post do go on....and on....and on.... a bit:rotfl:......cant promise i make sense but i do enjoy using words:p

On a more serious note and to use an anallergy.....much in the same way as the body needs a constant ongoing supply of vitamin C as its unable to store it for any great lenth of time......we need a source of ongoing support to get or remain focused and to give us that little bit extra courage when we reach an obstacle that needs overcome.
This forum is a fantastic source of vitamin C for debt worries and i would nt be without it now and look forward to seeing you and others progress.

Have a good day.....R