Son just left college.....now what?

Bendybops19

Also, yes you do have to make an appointment to talk to a person at the job centre, but it shouldnt be a month.

Go to https://www.jobcentre.gov.uk - it has all of the jobs online, alot easier than going to the actual jobh centre every few days!

Louisepp

This is excellent Fran. I've just had a good read. Thankyou thankyou!

tinalives

..................................

Louisepp

Bendybops19 wrote:

Wow, dont you think 1/3 is rather alot for an 18yr old who wont be earning much at all? I understand it must be hard now you have lost the child benefit though.
.

He won't think it's a lot. I think he'll be dead chuffed to have at least some of the money! Up until now he has been surviving on £10 per month. (We did give him more for a while...but he was only doing college for 3 days a week and felt he should top up with a part time job...which he didn't BTW)

If he earns £600 per month and gives me £200 of it. That'll give him £400 pocket money...to spend on himself....every month. Hey! That's about £350 more than me a month

Rikki

Years ago my parents took 2/3 of my wages from me at age 18. They said when I had my own house and resposibilities 2/3 would be needed to run the house and pay bills, the other 1/3 was for me. My house and bills cost more than 2/3 of my wages now.
(They actually saved 1/3 for me without me knowing a lovely bonus when I moved away from home.)

Spendless

Louise- you know your higher rate child benefit will transfer to your younger child don't you. Just in case you were working finances out on losing £17 a week, you haven't you've lost £11-odd CB wise.

Your tax credits may also change, but don't know if it'd be for the better or worse. you can put your figures in here https://www.entitledto.com

Savvy_Sue

Louisepp wrote:

I don't think he has had much luck with connextions. I remember they have called him, but he just tells me "they are useless". Not sure what they've done to warrant that.

No, well other people have said the same thing about them, and I suspect they have targets of getting young people into education / apprenticeships, whereas from the sound of it your son just wants to get a dead end job - don't take that too hard, I'm going on to say more! - which would make the help they can offer appear less interesting to him!

Louisepp wrote:

No ambition and likes a routine. He's got it into his head that he wants to do this sort of work. I believe that is because his friends do it for pocket money, so he feels safe....going into something he knows a little about. He should really be aiming a little higher. Does that sound awful? He has his HND, his load of GCSE's and an IQ of something like 149. I just can't see him behind a counter for the rest of his life...and that's what he'll do. He'll stick with it rather than stress himself out looking for something else.

He has Aspergers syndrome. It's not too much of a problem, but makes interviews hard (struggles with eye contact - but he tries).

Ah, Asperger's! My eldest has this as well! And it is hard to get them out of whatever rut they've worked themselves into! I will NEVER forget the letter we had from school doctor 'diagnosing' DS, which I read aloud to him, aged 12.

"X is an able child ... " I began

"No I'm not," X interrupted ...

"... who sometimes has difficulty accepting this ..."

"No ... " and then he realised he couldn't say "No I don't!", because if he didn't have difficulty accepting he was an able child, then he must be able!

At the moment, we still mention the Asperger's - it went on his UCAS form and it's been on job applications. But that's with his agreement. If you can find a way to word it which stresses the benefits to employers - "This means I am very focussed on the job" kind of thing - then that may help. But he may find he struggles to find work in catering and bars, where people skills are quite important! Maybe that's why he's struggling to find work now - has he thought of that?

When he does finally see someone at the JobCentre, I think it really would be a good idea to mention the Asperger's. They should take it into account, and ought to offer extra help with interview skills and the like.

But they do change - you want him to aim higher, but you also want him to be happy. At 12 mine wanted nothing more than to work for Games Workshop, and I seriously thought he might end up doing that, which secretly horrified me. But he 'grew out of' that phase. And I did consciously tell myself that it was his life he'd be wasting, not mine, and if he was happy doing it, then I should let him be.

Yes, maybe he'll get a 'dead end job' behind a bar. And maybe when his friends have gone off to Uni he'll miss them, and realise he could be there too. Especially when they come home for Christmas with tales of what they've been up to. And then they'll go back again in January, and he'll start to think. And you'll be there! Saying "It's never too late!"

Getting late and I'm rambling. Hope some of this helps!

rammy007

i think a third is too much,when i left schoolnearly 17 i got a yts and got £25 my mum said to give her a fifth which was £5,as long as i saved two fifths£10 and i had £10 to survive on this i think was fair when my wages increased then so did my board and by the time i was 21 i had my half for a deposit on a house

Savvy_Sue

rammy007 wrote:

i think a third is too much,when i left schoolnearly 17 i got a yts and got £25 my mum said to give her a fifth which was £5,as long as i saved two fifths£10 and i had £10 to survive on this i think was fair when my wages increased then so did my board and by the time i was 21 i had my half for a deposit on a house

But maybe your mum could afford that? And she did insist you saved £10, whereas some of us would have had the £15 and saved £10 for you. And 1/3 of £25 is a lot less than 1/3 of JSA.

It sounds as if you did learn to save, but I think those who learn YOUNG how much it costs to live (for example because their parents tell them, itemise the bills, and take the money off them!) do better than those who have simply no idea before they leave home.

tinalives

...........................