ned help re bf maybe moving in+pregnant and 1 child

new_mummy_3

hiya

i hope all this makes sense.i currently live with my dd who is 15 months old in a 2 bedroomed flat which is partly paid for by the council (i pay quite abit still)and i am on income support as i was advised by doctor to give up work after battling pnd for months following my daughters birth,this has worked and i am getting better and better as the days go on,my plan was to go back to work as i dont want to be at home but i am now 3 months pregnant,and before anyoen says i was been responsible on the pill and been careful but my anti depressants acted against it which the doctor didnt even realise,after suffering a miscarriage i couldnt go throuhg with an abortion.
so my question is my bf doesnt live with us at the minute but obviously once the baby comes it would be nice,or even before but we dont know if we can afford it,he earns about £17000 a year but only since jan and it is very uncertain as this is a temp contract so could continue or pay could go down,i know we would get child benefit for both children and ctc and wtc but would i be able to claim anything for been pregnant or not and would we just have to live on my bfs wage?he is also starting an open university degree next month and i am going to start college again in september as i want to go to uni also.i am aware i could get very bad pnd again to stp me working but my plan is to go back to work after the baby is born,i would go back now but who would employ a pregnant girl.
so i find myself in a situation where i never thought i would be,i gave up work to get better and now it is impossible to go back.
can anyone help with what we would be entitled to apart from what i have said.
sorry for long post,thankyou.
love k xxx

DaisyFlower

Yes, you would have to live on your boyfriends wage. Its not a bad wage and you may still qualify for some WTC/CTC, Family allowance can be claimed by everyone.

You would also come off IS which means you'll be able to keep the maintenance from the first father.

mookie

I am currently updating my tax credits details due to giving up work to look after my daughter. I could be wrong but I have read up on quite a lot of info so hope this is right.

If your bf is earning £17000 then its unlikely he would qualify for wtc as they only pay that to low income families. You would be entitled to ctc calculated on your joint income and you would get your child benefit. They will stop your IS as your partner works over the amount of hours to qualify and any housing benefits/council tax benefit will be reviewed to include your bf earnings.

All benefits are calculated to allow a family to live, so I wouldnt think you'll be any worse off. Is your home council or private? If its council then your rent would be lower than private rent or having a mortgage and his earnings are not too bad compared to some families meaning you could actually be better off. If he were to earn less or his circumstances change then you can inform all the relevant people to adjust your benefit as and when needed. You would not get any money for being pregnant as you havent been at work but you may be able to claim the sure start grant depending on when he decides to move in. Also as daisyflower says if the father of your daughter pays maintenance you would get the full amount once your IS gets stopped.

Its nicer to have him there and be a family, whatever his earnings your current benefit would be reviewed fairly. Good luck with the pregnancy.

new_mummy_3

thankyou to both of you,i like you think that it would be nice if we could all live as a family.my rent is £525 a month and i am privately renting so we would have to look at moving in feb when my lease is up because if he is living with me it wont matter if we have to move 5 mins or so away because at the minute we wanted to be close.
i dont get any maintenance as the father has no contact and it is a very long story but the family were quite threatening and as a 19 year old i just let them intimidate me.
would we get any help with his open university as we wouldnt want that to be put on hold??and also if i went to college would we get some help??it would be very tight as we both have some incomes going out and i dont know how we would cope but i am sure we would sit down and work it out.lol,my boyfriend is very much of the opinion that he cant afford to move in and that we couldnt afford the baby however he is going to have to come around to the idea soon,hehe i think its a little scary as he got with me when moo was 4 weeks old and has never been through pregnancy.
i am very careful about wanting to let all the authoritys know if he moves in as i dont want to get into trouble.we are thinking to give us time to save up that he should move in when bubs comes along,i know this sounds silly but i dont mind living on my own until then with my daughter as him and his family and my mum will still help and my midwife has told me to still claim the sure start maternity grant,would i have to pay this back once my bf moved in even if it is after the birth etc.
sorry about all the questions,thankyou for all the answers.
love kx xx

mookie

Not sure about the grant I doubt you would have to pay it back if your circumstances change after you have got it as its for baby things and you are on IS which is the qualifying criteria. If your BF saves money remember your savings could also be taken into consideration depending on the amount. If he is considering going to do a course then maybe he should sort that out before he moves in then your benefits would be reviewed with this in mind. Where is he living now is he not currently paying his own rent etc? As for not affording a baby, can any of us? lol. He'll just have to make sacrifices, whatever he treats himself to be it clothes, cars, going out he'll just have to cut down.

new_mummy_3

hiya again
my bf currently lives at home still,i only moved out of my mums with my dd in august aswell.sorry i didnt mean save money as in a bank account i meant he could pay it off his debts and things that he has from before he met me,you know how boys will be boys with there credit cards just so they can afford a night out.he doesnt go anywhere now and has been working so hard to pay his debts off so that he could move in with us,he doesnt pay for a car,i have my own car and i have insured him on this so i dont always have to drive,lol,although my poor car doesnt get used as much as it used to now that i dont have alot of money.
if i applied for the maternity grant i definately wouldnt if i knew he was moving in straight away,its just if he didnt i wouldnt be able to afford everything on my own although i wouldnt spend it on anything other than baby things but ill need to get another cot and pushchair etc.
does all this sound reasonable and i cant get into trouble for him moving in after babes is born as long as we tell them straight away??
he would be doing the open universitu course alongside working so maybe we would get a little help.
and i totally agree about who can afford children,although they dont have to cost alot,my dd never goes without but it doesnt cost much,she always has all she needs.she is my priority and is the reason im asking as i dont want to be struggling for her,i can go without but i would nevr let her.
love k xx

mookie

Yes I know what you mean my topshop days are over and its good old Primark for me. lol I dont think its unreasonable for you to apply for the grant, all benefits are paid on your current circumstances and at present you have not decided 100% he is moving in. It sounds like he has debts that need to be considered as while he is living with parents his money is his own and there is not so much pressure for him to meet the payments. You are forward planning but at least you are being honest and checking everything out, a lot of people would not and could land themselves in trouble for benefit fraud. Have a look at the online calculator on entitledto and put in as if you had just his income this will give an idea of what you can claim, then you can sit down together and weigh up your options. The future could be better than you imagine, you may not get pnd this time and everything could work out fine.

bestpud

£17000 is a reasonable income and you should be able to manage ok. There's lots of advice on here and people manage on a lot less, even with debts.

You will get ctc, which will be doubled for the baby until it is a year old. I'm not sure about wtc but I'm guessing it won't be a lot on that income.

You should also get help with childcare if you do go back to work.

I don't know about your college course (it depends on lots of things now, I think) but your oh may get some help with his OU fees. He needs to contact them direct and ask.

I can't see there being a problem with you claiming the maternity grant unless they decide you have deliberately held off moving him in to get it. It's based on your current income though, so if you are entitled then you can claim it to get some baby things together, as far as I can see.

One thing to consider though: it may be difficult for your dd if she has to adjust to sharing mummy with a new baby and a new 'daddy' within a short space of time.

new_mummy_3

hiya thanks for the advice
we are going to sit down and look at all our outgoings and maybe we can get rid of some that dont need to be there,
just thought i would add that my daughter is 15 months and has only ever known my bf as her daddy and she calls him daddy and cries when he goes home,his mum and dad are also her nan and pops,i went through pregnancy on my own and it was only for the first 4 weeks that i wasnt with my bf so she hasnt known anything other than it been us 3,the only thing that will be different is that he will be there over night aswell.sorry i probably didnt explain that very well,she has never known another man as her daddy as ive only been with him.haha but we will havr to introduce her to new baby as she is a right mummy and daddys girl
thanks for all the help.
k xxxx