Parents and students listen to Martin on Radio2

freebie_junkie

candyflossing wrote: »

Just to clarify, my living costs (rent, food, bills, equipment) were double my loan & wage put together. If I had received a bursary etc, I would not need nor want my parent's help.

My parents offered to pay for everything in full, rather than just give me the extra money I required, because they are completely against loans, and believe it just encourages people to spend money they don't have. If it were up to them I wouldn't even have had a loan.

Instead of spending my unspent loan on myself, I put it into a savings account.

- I just want to show people that just because my parents paid for everything, it doesn't mean I'm a fool with my money, or that I know nothing of the real world. I was working part-time 7 days a week, whilst on a full-time course, which is more than most students can say.

I wasn't implying that people from poorer backgrounds are more prone to wasting their money! I was giving personal experience.

I do beleive however, that it would be much easier to spend non-repayable financial aid (that has just been handed to you on a plate) on non-necessities (alcohol etc.) than your parent's money, that you know they worked long and hard to earn. That is to say, if you have any respect for your parents.

Edit: Freebie-junkie, who said that if my parents paid then the degree rightfully belongs to them - You got a loan to pay for your degree! Therefore I could say that your degree rightfully belongs to the Student Loan Company!

Are you going to pay your parents back? I will pay the SLC back. It's a LOAN not a HAND OUT.

I respect my Mum and Dad enough not to take their hand-earned money to spend on things like shoes and chocolate.

System

Once the tables have turned i.e. I'm earning full-time and my parents have retired, I will gladly give them any money they need! I would happily help any of my family financially, no questions asked.

The only difference between taking money from your parents and a loan is that a loan will aquire interest from which an outsider (company/bank etc.) will make profit.

Bennifred

candyflossing wrote: »

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If they really want to detach parents from any financial responsibility in this situation, they would give everyone (whatever their background) the exact same amount of financial help when entering uni.

I do think this should be the case (parents not having to have financial responsibility for adult offspring). The current system seems very hard on those students whose parents may well earn more than what might be considered a basic amount, but have other commitments which prevent them affording to support those students no matter how much they would want to. This system is also hard on those students whose parents just will not help financially, because although there is an expectation that support will happen there is no way to enforce it.

andyrules

freebie_junkie wrote: »

If you check candyflossing's post which I was replying to, it was him/her who originally made a point about going out and drinking- s/he was implying that poorer students on full grants waste their money on going out- I was simply replying to them and refuting their claims, not trying to make any point of my own, why not check in future before you make a comment?!

I am obviously not going to give a full break down of my accounts on an open forum- don't be silly! I have lived in both student accomodation priced at £1500 per term all inclusive- including 2 meals per weekday and in my 2nd year I moved into a flat which costs more as rent, utilities, food etc. cost more when you are paying seperately. I paid top-up fees when they came into affect in my 3rd year and now during my PGDE also. I think that is enough personal financial information to release to a stranger.

I simply think that letting your paents pay for it all (not just topping-up- paying for it ALL) as candyflossing has said that s/he did is a cop-out from real, adult life and yes, some of your grade is due to your parents in that case. Also, the more some students get from their mums and dads, the more they want to spend- borrowing on cc's etc. as they have no idea about real money, they think that overdrafts and cc's are 'free money' not debt that they are buying. I'm not making this up, this has happened to several people close to me, close enough to discuss financial matters with.

Re the point about students going out - I read that you were saying you don't go out or drink, and by implication that others do. You say later that you wouldn't waste money on shoes and chocolate, again implying that some students do just this. If this is not what you meant then I apologise for misunderstanding you.

Re the point about your budget - you stated that you fully support yourself, work for yourself and manage to save - a fairly commendable set of achievements for a student on a full time course. Maybe others could benefit from your skills, or maybe as people have tried to explain, some students have much heavier commitments than others, depending on where they study/what they study/when they enrolled/size of their loan! Many students starting in 2006 will have already paid £6000 more than you in top up fees alone!

You are correct in your assertion that some students regard debt as 'free money', sadly they have been shown a very poor example, ie debt is fine, in the loan system itself! It is no accident that fees are paid directly to the institutions.

Back to your original assertion - some students HAVE to rely on parental hand-outs. It is an expectation that parents will contribute where they can - that is the point of the sliding scale! I find it sad that you regard parental input so cynically, but you are lucky not to need their help.

jennifernil

I don't think you can generalise about students and money, or students and anything. Some are totally hopeless while others are financially astute, can cook,clean and hold down a part-time job. Just like the rest of us.

All parents should try to teach their kids about money and how to look after themselves, whether they are students or not.

freebie_junkie

andyrules wrote: »

Re the point about students going out - I read that you were saying you don't go out or drink, and by implication that others do. You say later that you wouldn't waste money on shoes and chocolate, again implying that some students do just this. If this is not what you meant then I apologise for misunderstanding you.

Re the point about your budget - you stated that you fully support yourself, work for yourself and manage to save - a fairly commendable set of achievements for a student on a full time course. Maybe others could benefit from your skills, or maybe as people have tried to explain, some students have much heavier commitments than others, depending on where they study/what they study/when they enrolled/size of their loan! Many students starting in 2006 will have already paid £6000 more than you in top up fees alone!

You are correct in your assertion that some students regard debt as 'free money', sadly they have been shown a very poor example, ie debt is fine, in the loan system itself! It is no accident that fees are paid directly to the institutions.

Back to your original assertion - some students HAVE to rely on parental hand-outs. It is an expectation that parents will contribute where they can - that is the point of the sliding scale! I find it sad that you regard parental input so cynically, but you are lucky not to need their help.

Once again, my comments on going out were in reply to candyflossing who suggested in a prior post that poorer students waste their money on beer whilst ones whose parents pay their way don't, I have already cleared this up once before.

I don't think that parents should pay for everything as in the case of candyflossing.

My course is vey intensive but with adequate time management, it is possible to both work and study.

System

By stating my personal experience, I was not expecting you to generalise it to the entire population.

You can't make general assumptions about a person based on what their parents give them.

I'm sure if your parents were financially comfortable, had money to spare, and offered you some, you wouldn't hesitate to take it!

It's like people who say 'If I won the lottery I'd give half to charity' or 'If I was that rich I wouldn't be so greedy' - In reality you don't know how you'll react until you're in the situation yourself, and until then you shouldn't try to take the moral high ground.

robnye

i do agree with the statement above relating to students from lower income families receiving a higher grant than others.
my eldest daughter is starting uni in oct 08, due to my income which is quite high, she will only get 75 % of the grant, even though we dont have anywhere near the other 25% available as excess cash, we dont live beyond our means, shop around for everything, whilst we will do all we can to help her out - she is fully aware that any shortful will have to be made by her working (which is has no problem with)

poet123

I think there are a lot of very bitter students out there who for whatever reason have been brought up to believe not that money has to be earned, but that "what is mine is mine and what's yours is yours".

Therefore, they seem to resent any family who believes that money is earned and is to be spent for the general good of that family,and that what that good is can be decided by those who earn it.

Their resentment is hidden behind the premise that standing on your own two feet is the only way to go,it is if you haven't been fortunate enough to have a choice in the matter.

Do that if you wish,but dont berate others who do have a choice,or belittle their achievements because of it.

freebie_junkie

candyflossing wrote: »

By stating my personal experience, I was not expecting you to generalise it to the entire population.

You can't make general assumptions about a person based on what their parents give them.

I'm sure if your parents were financially comfortable, had money to spare, and offered you some, you wouldn't hesitate to take it!

It's like people who say 'If I won the lottery I'd give half to charity' or 'If I was that rich I wouldn't be so greedy' - In reality you don't know how you'll react until you're in the situation yourself, and until then you shouldn't try to take the moral high ground.

I have nothing against being generous, I'm generous with my family but in the proper contexts. Paying for your adult child's full rent and board and giving them pocket money is just wrong imo. I wouldn't in a million years dream of lettign my parents pay my way.