How much would you spend on your childs 18th birthday ?

avstar

Hi all

My DD (only child) is 18 in a few weeks and I really need to get my act together and sort out what I'm getting her.
But how much do people spend on this milestone birthday ?

I work fulltime but financially things are really really tight and I'm struggling to keep on top of my bills, mortgage, pay off CC while saving desperately for a car etc etc. I figure lots of people on MSE are in the same boat as me so might be able to help work out how much is a decent amount to spend.

Friends seem to be getting lavish parties and huge gifts but I'm not in that league, and DD knows that and wouldn't expent all that. She's working full time now (altho minimum wage) so not fully dependant on me. Burt I'll feel awful if I don't make some sort of fuss !

Also any ideas for gifts/celebrations on the cheap will be welcomed. I won some vouchers for a supermarket so I'm going to use those for a card, big cake, little gift like perfume etc.


Its times like this my financial situation really gets to me, I can just about manage but something like this or something going wrong with the house or car and I'm sunk !

destiny_star2006

Presents should be a bonus nice card and cake should do just fine x
She sounds like she knows how much u struggle etc and im sure she wouldnt want you loosing sleep getting her a good gift

floss2

Why don't you ask if she'd like to have her mates round, and use your supermarket voucher for the pizzas & beer?

I bet if you buy the ingredients over a few weeks to spread the cost, you could make her a cake - ask on the Old Style board for help & ideas if you're stuck.

Also, do you have any Boots points to buy her some perfume/makeup? Have a look on the Boots Grabbit Board for help with them, and any vouchers that are floating around.

My DS1 got a DKNY watch (£95-ish) for his 18th, DS2 got a home-made "voucher" for a camera & we paid for it when he had chosen it (about £90) - but both of those presents were subsidised by my partner. DS1 got silver cufflinks for his 21st, as will DS2 next year

Fen1

If she's sensible and understands your financial situation she will appreciate that you cannot be OTT with her. Perhaps you could do nice things for her the week of her birthday? Breakfast in bed? A girlie night in with a good video, nice bottle of wine, paint each other's nails etc.? Put a little surpise in her lunchboxes - a mini-birthday cake, tiny teddy, ticket to the cinema, a bottle of nail varnish etc just small things that are silly or fun or would mean something to her. Just making the week 'special' would be really lovely and wouldn't cost a fortune.

frugallass

Fen1 what a lovely idea !

My daughter has just been to a sweet sixteen party (not as fabulous as she expected it to be funnily enough) and I thought "oh no, this is going to be all the rage" - luckily I managed to book our family holiday the same week she is 16 and we'll just go out for a nice meal and I'll get her a special bit of jewellery as a momento - there is no way I could have afforded a big lavish party for her !

vixarooni

Why dont you celebrate her 21st more. Will give you 3 years to save up for something special. Id have rather celebrated my 21st more on reflection because not all of my friends were 18 and i was one of the first so we all couldnt go out clubbing together.

My suggestions would be: Balloons, get a few saying 18 on them, a good cake and a nice little pressie.

kr15snw

I went out for a meal with my friends which my parents offered to pay for but I refused.

My mum then arranged to have my family (brothers, nan, fave aunties and uncles) over for a 'house party'. There was a buffet and a nice cake and we just chatted and enjoyed nice drink I enjoyed this so much Im doing the same for my 21st!

Maybe you could ask her if she would prefer to celebrate her 18th or 21st more? I chose 18th meaning my parents are treating my 21st as a normal birthday, although I am paying myself to have a party at work in one of the function rooms. They have said I can do as I like (as I dont live at home now) but I must do it myself now as they did my 18th

My present was my first car, sort of. I was pinching my dads corsa so much that they let me have it, but they kept the trust fund theyd been saving for me (about 2.5k in it) meaning that they gave me about £500 Id guess (car was worth about 3k at time).

But how about somthing she will remember and find usefull? One of my friends has just had her 21st and wanted driving lessons from everyone which we happily obliged

Rachie_B

Fen1 wrote: »

If she's sensible and understands your financial situation she will appreciate that you cannot be OTT with her. Perhaps you could do nice things for her the week of her birthday? Breakfast in bed? A girlie night in with a good video, nice bottle of wine, paint each other's nails etc.? Put a little surpise in her lunchboxes - a mini-birthday cake, tiny teddy, ticket to the cinema, a bottle of nail varnish etc just small things that are silly or fun or would mean something to her. Just making the week 'special' would be really lovely and wouldn't cost a fortune.

aww :T fab idea/s

OP im sure she wont expect a lot ,and anything you do will be special to her

Vik

Hi, I must say I love Fen1's idea. It's all about making her feel special and that woudl make the whole week and lead-up to her birthday amazing! I was lucky enough to get a bracelet from my parents for my 18th which was lovely as every time I wear it I know where it is from and I always make sure I wear it on special occasions. However it sounds like she understands your situation and will appreciate every effort you make with her. Again I agree with other posters and maybe look at getting her something extra special for her 21st. Possibly a watch or something similar she can keep for years?

avstar

Aw thanks everyone ! There's some absolutely wonderful ideas, thank you all for posting.


I do have some Boots advantage points (about £35 quids worth:D ) which didn't cross my mind. I work hard at saving them and then never remember to spend them ! So that could def buy something nice, leaving more of the other vouchers to spend on food/drinks for a party.

I love the idea of little gifts to find over the space of a week.:T

I really wanted to do a family get-together but its not going to be possible to get everyone together as some relatives are away. So I think I'll do a really nice meal/cake/balloons for close family and she can have her mates round for a sleepover/drinkiepoo.

I'm surprised people still want to do the 21st birthday thing - I thought that had kind of died out so that would be good if I can delay a big do/pressie till then ! I'll ask DD altho she can't think past next weekend so 3 years away is out of her comprehension !!

I'm just relieved that I'm not the only one who isn't going to be buying their DD a brand new car, prada watch etc. 'MTV Sweet 16' you've got a lot to answer for !

frugallass

absolutely - anyway it sounds like you've done a fantastic job of bringing your daughter up and she will appreciate all your efforts