am i young enough to give it all up and start again?



  • (Land_of)_Maz
    (Land_of)_Maz Posts: 11,738 Forumite
    awwww hun, i really didn't mean to make you cry.... but yes you are lucky!!

    i guess our dream stems from my husband growing up in a nice house and the whole 2 point 4 children thing, and me growning up in a crummy broken home. guess we both thought the perfect senario was the big house, happy family stuff! and well it isn't!

    I can relate to that too, similarly my OH had a nice house loadsa money but he never saw his dad and that got to him, whereas i had a rented council house, crummy circumstances but i knew my folks were there for me...

    There is a certain pride in owning your own home, but no shame in renting, the home is important beacuse of who's there and how you make it, not whether or not you own the bricks.

    keep posting here or in the other threads and let us know how you get on.

    shared housing, something to think about further down the line....

    chin up chuck!
    I'm just a seething mass of contradictions....
    (it's part of my charm!)
  • Seaxwyn
    Seaxwyn Posts: 4,896 Forumite
    Hi pinkladez, I think it's a good idea to sell up and go back to renting.

    I didn't buy a house til I was 37 and had four children! Looking back on the years renting, they were happy and stress-free

    And you don't need a big house to provide a happy home for your daughter. Secure, unstressed parents will be far more important for her!
    Total debt: 1 January 2007 £[strike]49,387.79[/strike] 1 January 2012 £[STRIKE]19,312.85[/STRIKE] 1 August 2012 £11,517.62

  • thank you everyone for all your coments after sleeping on it, it does seem to make the most sense, will talk to dh tomorrow as wont see him today. guess the next step is to get the estate agents in and see what our house is really worth.
  • dhassen
    dhassen Posts: 759 Forumite
    I'm 26 and got debt (granted less than you guys). Me and the gf rent so we don't own a home. Sounds like selling up and starting again would be a good idea to me if it means you'd be debt free! why not try and find somewhere cheaper to rent, then you will save even more for your deposit?
    Official DFW Nerd Club - Member no. 784 - Proud to be dealing with my debts
  • barnaby-bear
    barnaby-bear Posts: 4,142 Forumite
    Seaxwyn wrote: »
    Hi pinkladez, I think it's a good idea to sell up and go back to renting.

    I didn't buy a house til I was 37 and had four children! Looking back on the years renting, they were happy and stress-free

    And you don't need a big house to provide a happy home for your daughter. Secure, unstressed parents will be far more important for her!

    Downsizing may be an idea, but having spent several years in rentals - it was hard. A lot of landlords won't allow kids or pets in my area, even if you do they won't let you paint their rooms, put up a shelf etc. There's the constant fear of the AST notice which means if the LL wants to sell etc it's 2 months notice, plus the wait and fight for the deposit; moving potentially every 6 months at 2 months notice - finding somewhere OK available so not paying double rent for too long is stressful, nevermind tryign to deal with schools/catchment areas. Then you get the always buying cheap bits of furniture because the moving means they fall apart, have to be discarded, one rental has no fridge the next does but no storage space.... means lots of hidden expenses. Then when something breaks getting it fixed is a battle with the LL and his yield. Tiny scuffs on paintwork lose £100s off the deposit and/or a fight off a lot of LLs, then there are agency fees, credit checks, making sure you have an extra deposit in hand because you usually have to pay the next+up front rent when you move before you get the last one back....
  • barnaby-bear
    barnaby-bear Posts: 4,142 Forumite
    BTW if you could get a HA/council tenancy with security of tenure those are great - the private rental sector is nasty to be in though....
  • sasp
    sasp Posts: 1,117 Forumite
    thank you everyone for all your coments after sleeping on it, it does seem to make the most sense, will talk to dh tomorrow as wont see him today. guess the next step is to get the estate agents in and see what our house is really worth.

    Hi, I just wanted to let you know I was in your shoes last year (April) and had my own home and lots of debt with equity. We did sell (luckily to a landlord, who rented it back to us) but the relief has been tremendous. I'm obviously not here to sway your decision as this can only be yours and your hub.
    I too worried so much about keeping a roof over my children's heads (I have 4), and I can't say it has all been plain sailing for me, however it did clear a lot of our debt, leaving only a small amount, we have just bought a caravan and now spend quality time together rather than weekends of work and worry.
    I am 35 (where you want to be for your next house:D ) but I still consider myself young enough to get back on the property ladder if that's what is best for me and my family. However to be honest my rent is much cheaper than my mortgage and I'm enjoying being able to pay my bills properly and still have a tiny bit left over for us.

    I hope you feel ok today, and whatever you decide will be the best for you and your family, there are always options no matter what.

    Take care
    sasp x;)
    "You know, somebody actually complimented me on my driving today. They left a little note on the windscreen, it said 'Parking Fine.'"

    (How funny was Tommy Cooper)
  • ilovecheese
    ilovecheese Posts: 254 Forumite

    We sold up in August las year (3 bed house) and now rent a 1 bed flat. We just had enough money to pay off the mortgage and the secured loan. We now have 900 extra per month disposable income! Owning a house it not that important! My husband is 48 I'm 35 and I don't think we ever buy again, and that does not bother me all. We have never been so happy, I am sure it will be a pain in the a*se when we have to move again, but we will cross that bridge when we come to it. If you decide to rent, make sure you research the property, we know that our flat has been rented for over 15 years and our rent will not be affected by intrest rates, my sister rented a house from a couple who had moved to Australia and 20 months after they moved in they had to move out as the owners wanted to return to the UK. I am so glad we made the decision last year, best thing we ever did! I used to spend 3 hours every Saturday cleaning my house, it now takes 45 minutes to clean my flat! result!
  • MrsTinks
    MrsTinks Posts: 15,241 Forumite
    First Post Combo Breaker Name Dropper First Anniversary
    We're on the property ladder and if we rented we'd be able to rent a MUCH bigger house than we own... for less money! However - think long and hard about doing this - be sure before you go ahead with it.
    I think in your position it's a good idea to sell up and rent - As others have said you are by no means at a point where you can't save up for a deposit for a new house later on if you wish!
    It will take a few years for your credit score to repair itself - that will give you time to save up a sizable chunk to put down as a deposit as well as being debt free. If say you could put by £500 a month that's £18,000 in 3 years... not bad for a deposit :)
    As for renting... It's not that bad. Sure you have good and bad landlords, but go through a lettings agent and you should with luck be covered for much eventualities. Go with the bigger well known names (I used to work for one many years ago - we had far less problems than I had personally with other agencies when renting who were small and frankly amateurish) and make sure you take time to read the rental agreement in full. Also make sure you walk round with them when they do their property check in and later check out - that should cover most problems regarding the deposit!
    I've had some super landlords over the years, most either were happy for me to redecorate or put up shelves - just make sure you write to them and get a written permission from them first - or they will be happy with you "returning the property to the original condition when occupancy first began" - ie if you painted a room pink you might have to paint it magnolia before you leave :) And any holes in the walls need to be filled, skimmed and painted.
    Normal wear and tear is covered in your rent, but any major stains etc might need to be cleaned or carpets replaced. Make sure you have contents insurance and you'll probably find this will be covered leaving you little or nothing to pay :)
    DFW Nerd #025
    DFW no more! Officially debt free 2017 - now joining the MFW's! :)

    My DFW Diary - blah- mildly funny stuff about my journey
  • izzybusy23
    izzybusy23 Posts: 994 Forumite
    ok is this the point in my life where i am actualy glad to be in my 20's?!
    this will be quite long winded but its all going round in my head!
    the senario is as follows i am 26 living with my husband who is 27 and have a 3 year old.
    We bought our first home when i was 18 and he was 19 at the time everyone thought we were nuts but hey we paid less on our mortgage than we paid renting our flat so at the time we thought it was the best plan.

    being 18 and 19 with a home meant everyone wanted to give us credit and niavely we took it!!

    by the time we had our daughter we had outgown our first home so we moved to our 3 bed semi.

    unfortunatly things are not as rosey as we wuld have liked we are now in £38,000 of debt and struggeling. i lost my job after being made redundant and am still waiting for some kind of payout which i dont think will ever happen.
    now we are in the process of setting up a dmp with cccs but over my sponge pudding last night darling husband decided to tell me he has been thinking about selling up finding a rented home and rebuilding our lives. we hadnt really ever discussed this option ( cccs had suggested it) other than saying we thought it was our last option as we desperatly want to make sure we have a home for dd.

    if we sold up ( similar houses are on the market for £140k to £160k- im saying £140k as i want to stay realistic) this would clear a major chunk of debt. cccs says possibly all if we offered a full and fnal settelment on all. also i assume debt would go down as we would stay on a dmp til house is sold.

    hopefully if all went smoothly we would find a nice rented home for similar amount we pay for mortgage £700 or less!we would be debt free and with the extra income we would have (at least £400 a month) we could start saving for a deposit and being debt free we could start repairing our credit file. also being in a rented home means we would be in an ideal position to buy again one day.

    now have i got my head stuck in the clouds is this a stupid idea?? or am i young enough to start my life again??anyone done this? anyone wish they had done this??

    You're never too old to start again.

    I'm 36 soon, and I live in rented with my husband and 3 year old daughter. My life hasn't gone to plan either, with failed relationships forcing me out of my home each time, so at the age of 35 I am nowhere near where I hoped to be at me age.

    Daughter starts school next September so nursery fee's will disappear and we hope to pay off a long standing debt by then too.. so I am hoping by the time I am 40, house prices will have fallen significantly and we would have saved up enough money to put a 30% deposit down on a house.

    If you feel that by selling your house will release you of the burden and worry and will enrich your lives, then go for it. Ok, renting is not ideal, but whats the point having your own roof over your head with that level of debt and worrying... or having the luxury of renting with anything going wrong not your problem and being debt free??

    Good luck!!
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