Lending money to friends & family

harryhound

Just get the borrower to sign an undated cheque.

Spleensmrs

Going back to December last year my son who is 17 was offered a job at a neighbours business. It was initially on an adhoc basis and then became more frequent to the point that in February he was pretty much full time. However after a few weeks of working full time he questioned why he wasn't paying tax or NI as there wasn't any breakdown on his pay slip, he asked on numerous occasions to go on the books but it fell on deaf ears. It transpires that most of the staff within their business are paid cash in hand including their own son who gets handed a wad of cash each Friday. In February of this year he passed his driving test and obviously sought quotes for car insurance and as you can imagine the cost of insurance was through the roof. He received a quote but the deposit was £423 and unfortunately his father and I weren't in a position to help him out. When he discussed this at work the owners of the business offered to lend him the £423 and he could pay it back weekly, which I understand was very kind of them and he was extremely grateful. He repaid the debt at £20 a week but then at the end of April they started to make his life unbearable whilst working with them and eventually it got to the point of constructive dismissal on the 13th May. He has been trying to find employment but currently isn't working and obviously due to his age he cannot claim job seekers allowance. Our neighbour came over to our house 4 weeks ago re: an outstanding balance of £80 from the original £423, I answered the door and explained that he wouldn't be able to pay that amount at that time as he just doesn't have it. I'm recovering from my 4th fight with cancer and I don't work so its only my husband's income that comes into the house for 5 of us. Things are extremely tight financially at the moment. Then yesterday I receive a letter addressed to me by recorded delivery stating that unless I pay the outstanding balance by the 8th July they are going to persue me through the court. The document also states that they will charge me interest, administration charges or any other charge that they feel appropriate. I have at no point been a guarantor for this loan and have never signed anything or even verbally agreed that this debt is mine. I'm not denying that the money is owed but as I have stated earlier my son just can't pay it. Talking to these people won't work as they have even been harrassing my son when he just walks to and from the house, something that my husband has now put to rights by telling them in a polite way to stop. Please can anyone tell me if I am responsible for this debt or how I go about putting a letter together with definite facts about why I am not liable for this debt if this is the case.
Thanks

chalkie99

No. you are not responsible for your sons debts.

Send a letter back telling them this and say you have passed their letter to your son so that he can deal with it directly.

Next, get your son to write them a letter. Don't mention the debt - just write that he is trying to sort out his financial affairs and he has been asked to provide details of the tax and National Insurance contributions he has paid and his wage slips do not seem to provide this.

Tell them he needs correct documents as a matter of urgency to put his affairs in order. Hopefully, that will scare them off!

LovelyLeeds

josh_williams wrote: »

are these text anyway binding as a contract or legal transaction.

How about wording an email, carefully mentioning the agreed amounts that you already have via text, and that you want to set it down on paper, then fingers crossed, hope they reply to you with some acknowledgement of the debt. Say something like, thank you for paying £xxxx so far towards the loan, how do you feel about repaying me a monthly amount of £xxxx until it is cleared. At least then, with an acknowledgement, you can build on this, and get a case together.
If your email is ignored, even then, you could possibly add it to your case. Also, type out all the texts in chronological order, and take the phone to court for further proof.

DCFC79

Spleensmrs wrote: »

Going back to December last year my son who is 17 was offered a job at a neighbours business. It was initially on an adhoc basis and then became more frequent to the point that in February he was pretty much full time. However after a few weeks of working full time he questioned why he wasn't paying tax or NI as there wasn't any breakdown on his pay slip, he asked on numerous occasions to go on the books but it fell on deaf ears.

It transpires that most of the staff within their business are paid cash in hand including their own son who gets handed a wad of cash each Friday. In February of this year he passed his driving test and obviously sought quotes for car insurance and as you can imagine the cost of insurance was through the roof. He received a quote but the deposit was £423 and unfortunately his father and I weren't in a position to help him out.

When he discussed this at work the owners of the business offered to lend him the £423 and he could pay it back weekly, which I understand was very kind of them and he was extremely grateful. He repaid the debt at £20 a week but then at the end of April they started to make his life unbearable whilst working with them and eventually it got to the point of constructive dismissal on the 13th May. He has been trying to find employment but currently isn't working and obviously due to his age he cannot claim job seekers allowance. Our neighbour came over to our house 4 weeks ago re: an outstanding balance of £80 from the original £423, I answered the door and explained that he wouldn't be able to pay that amount at that time as he just doesn't have it.

I'm recovering from my 4th fight with cancer and I don't work so its only my husband's income that comes into the house for 5 of us. Things are extremely tight financially at the moment. Then yesterday I receive a letter addressed to me by recorded delivery stating that unless I pay the outstanding balance by the 8th July they are going to persue me through the court. The document also states that they will charge me interest, administration charges or any other charge that they feel appropriate. I have at no point been a guarantor for this loan and have never signed anything or even verbally agreed that this debt is mine. I'm not denying that the money is owed but as I have stated earlier my son just can't pay it.

Talking to these people won't work as they have even been harrassing my son when he just walks to and from the house, something that my husband has now put to rights by telling them in a polite way to stop. Please can anyone tell me if I am responsible for this debt or how I go about putting a letter together with definite facts about why I am not liable for this debt if this is the case.
Thanks

couldnt not do anything about the lack of paragraphs here

DCFC79

Id never lend a large amount of money to friends but maybe family, most i would lend to friends is £10 and i do get it is paid back pretty quick

LovelyLeeds

DCFC79 wrote: »

couldnt not do anything about the lack of paragraphs here

...and picking on a poster for lack of paragraphs is worse than your grammatically challenging post?;)

smj43

I have a problem with 2 brothers always coming to me for money. My brothers are both working and both single. They still live with my parents. I'm working and have to support a partner and child as well as living away from my parents. For some reason, they just can't control their spending and both live way above their means. On the other hand, I have quite alot of money in savings and they know this so they use emotional blackmail and give me no choice but to lend them money and bail them out time after time. I have tried to say no, but I just can't do it. They always have a reason why they need money and give me no choice. The thing is they rarely pay me back and if they do, it is usually months down the line. I need my money for my future and my family. How can I stop them depending on me to bail them out?

Tixy

You do have a choice.
You just need to start saying no to them. If you are finding it hard maybe tell them you have invested your savings in an account you don't have easy access to, or that you have gambled it all away on online betting sites. Or that you are waiting for a new bank card to come through, or that you have used your savings to book a round the world trip. Anything you like if you think it would make it easier for you to say no.

Or you could try asking them for a loan just after their paydate (and then don't pay it back knock it off what they owe you).

Or next time they ask show them a small cashbook where you have written down the date and amount you are about to loan them, and ask them to sign that and give a date the money will be paid back. The time after that tell them you won't lend them anything until they have paid off the previous loan written in your book.

ElmerFudd

I've told my brother point blank now I won't lend him anymore money. He still owes me over £300. I'll never see that.