Lending money to friends & family

Johntea

And may I just add as I forgot to do so above:

The way I look upon it now is (If thinking of lending money to 'friends'):If YOU weren't their 'friend', i.e. they had never bumped in to you or knew you existed then would they still be getting through life today no matter how poor off they were? Probably.

Hope that makes sense as I can't really think of a way to phrase it properly. Basically they would have survived without you or your cash

helpme33

First I'm sorry if I've not posted this right. I've never done this before. This is a little bit different from the other posts in respect it was us who initially borrowed some money.
My partner's grandmother lent her a sum of money for a deposit for our house 3 1/2 yrs ago. This was on an informal basis with no terms set out. She told my partner she didn't want the money back a year and a half ago. She has recently died and within 24 hours my partner's aunt rang to say she and her brother (the uncle) want the money back and that it had always been a loan and never turned into a gift. (My partner's father died a year ago).Their solicitor's have written her a letter giving her one month to pay or they will begin court proceedings against her. It is too large an amount for a county court so there are potentially large legal fees involved. Has anyone any idea of what she can do? Feeling so upset and worried.

Rafter

If there is no written agreeement or terms then there is no proof that it was a gift or a loan.

Is there a will? If the will is badly drafted, I guess any estate may go to the uncle and aunt rather than 1/3 coming down to your partner as a grand child.

If what was given/lend to you is less than 1/3 of the grandmothers estate I would flatly refuse to repay. If however your partner is entitled to 1/3 of the estate he could co-operate with the uncle and aunt and ensure the will is 'fair' by reducing his share by the amount already given.

Sounds like a potentially expensive family dispute and I suggest you go see citizens advice before appointing your own solicitor.

Until then restate your position to the solicitor that although it was initially a loan it was turned into a gift verbally. Unfortunately if the grandmothers estate is worth more than 300k it could mean that you have to pay some inheritance tax.

Good luck

R.

helpme33

Thanks R,
No, there is no will and what was lent I'm pretty sure is more than a 1/3rd of the estate. Thank you for replying.

kent_lady

Three years ago I lent my friend £3000 to pay off a credit card. She said she would set up a SO to repay me at £175 per month and the debt would therefore be repaid in 2 years.

She actually set up a SO for £50 which ran for a year out of her mum's account. She then agreed to take it back off her mum but somehow "never got round" to setting up a new SO. With other bits I lent her the debt has returned to just under £3000.

She is useless with money (I know that now!!! ) and although she said to me a couple of months ago to reconfirm my bank details for her,I've put off doing it as I know she is in financial doo-doo again at the moment.

Am I being too soft? Should I just email her the SO details and hope that jolts her conscience????!!!

sallyanne1984

:mad:

I know this thread is for lending money to friends and family, however how does it work for girlfriends/boyfriends?

My ex is trying to sue me for money which he gave to me as gifts. We were dating (not living together) for about 16 months. Last September I finished the relationship and shortly after (about 2 months) I got with my current boyfriend. My ex was extremely bitter about it as he thought I had cheated on him (I had'nt) and spread vicious rumours about me and spoke to all my friends about me (nasty things). Then, after emotionally bullying my partner at our local gym, he hit him on Christmas Eve! This was an unprovocked attack in a pub when my bf was sending a text to someone. My partner reported the incident and my ex recieved a caution from the police. We thought that was it.

He was told my the police to leave both myself and my partner alone. However about a month letter I recieved a letter from my ex saying that I owe him £680. The amounts of money are 5 and he has no dates for any of them. It's almost as though he has picked certain amounts he has spent on me. He wrote a list of the believed loans such as General loan - 140 pounds, Driving lessons - 40 etc. He even said I owe money to his mum for driving lessons. His family were very money orientated. I dont understand why he is doing this. He seems bitter and twisted and seems to want revenge regardless of the fact that I dont owe him anything.

I have never signed any agreements for loans so I didnt know what he is talking about. He is claiming in the letters that there was a verbal agreement which I did not do. Anyway, after ignoring this letter, a second letter came asking for the money again, this time more threatening, saying could I swear under oath that I didnt borrow the money? Is county court done under oath?? I went to his house along with my bf and his friend as a witness and said 'leave me alone'. He said 'no I want my money'. I then asked him for the so called evidence and he said 'no, I want to go to court'. I then said 'Look, show me any evidence of any loans and I'll go to the cash machine right now'. He said 'no I want to go to court'.

I have been told that if a person offers to settle out of court, then it can not go to court. Is this true? I rang the police who went around to his place and told him to stop sending letters. Then, the policeman told me that the letter was real and that he is taking me to court. I dont understand how this could even go to court when it is as obvious as an ex wanting revenge. Surely any court or judge could see what he is trying to do and throw it out of court? I'm just fed up of him being in my life and trying to destroy my new relationship and trying to make me unhappy.

His dad called my partner and apparently he is taking over the case for his son. If he loses his dad is apparently going to prosecute me for perjury. Is there any laws to do with loan sharking here? In the meantime I am worrying about all this as I am thinking that he is so bitter that he has made up evidence. Furthermore, it is all very embarrasing as he keeps sending copies to me dad saying he's my legal guardian. I'm 22! It's affecting my third year uni - it's as though he has timed all this knowing I worry a lot!

I believe that my ex is doing this because he is trying to control me and he knows I worry a lot. His father, mother and him all hasve referred to my worrying even saying to my partner 'I know she worries alot...'

I'm expecting a letter in the next week regarding whether it is going to court or not.

Any advice please


Thanks

kent_lady

Hmmm... I'm not sure about the exact legal position but it seems to me that:

- he has no proof that the money was lent
- he's destroyed any credibility he may have hid by lumping your BF and threatening you
- the police are aware of his behaviour

Could you get an injunction against him for harrassment?

I think you need proper advice - maybe CAB? Clearly speaking to his parents is not an option.

My feeling is you don't owe him anything - you were in a relationship when he gave you the money so surely it was given freely at that time? Just because the relationship ended he can't suddenly decide it was all lent.

Keep us posted.

xx

koplegend

Hello

Im being loaned money by my family to purchase a new property. The total value of the loan is over £100k and although we are working on drawing up a loan agreement I was wondering if there are any tax implications that need to be considered.

Would someone be able to advise.

Thanks!!!

scara

Well folks I've done some due dilligence on the small claims track of the county court system.
Unfortunately I find myself agreeing with ejones point of view.
It would cost me £100 to initiate the case then a further £100 for the actual hearing.
Then if the other party are found to be liable but do not pay there is no enforcement method to ensure they abide by the judgement. The court can send baliffs to them at your (my) request but this would incur an additional fee which was not specified.
In fact on the gov.co.uk website which explains how the system works and how to go about making a claim it states that if you don't believe the other party will pay you then it's not worth taking them to court.
As much as it burns me up in the interest of not wasting any more time and money on that lot for the moment at least I shall regrettably have to put aside this course of action.
Thanks again to everyone for the advice and support.
Cheers scara

ceegee

scara wrote: »

In fact on the gov.co.uk website which explains how the system works and how to go about making a claim it states that if you don't believe the other party will pay you then it's not worth taking them to court.
Cheers scara

That is absolutely sickening, it really is. We have to be so very, very careful about lending money to others. There is a sticky thread about this very thing......full of similar horror stories (including mine!)

Just try your utmost to put it behind you. Remember it, if anyone asks you for a loan in the future.