Light at the end of the tunnel

tazladytaz

I am going to use this thread as my diary. I need to keep myself motivated!
Basically, like a lot of people on here, I have had a rough year or so. The last few months have been particularly bad. Just before christmas my husband ended up in hospital for an op, but they found more than expected to. As a result he has had another op and needs another soon. Just after christmas I feel ill and am still off sick, waiting for an op too. That means no overtime, which is what I used to live off as my pay just about covered my debts. This means over the last few months I have been getting deeper into debt. Then the cars broke down, between them in the last few months it has cost over £2000. Then my car got broken into last week, just for a £20 aldi sterio. Other things have gone wrong in the last few months, including having a solicitors bill for £1000+, eldest son has aspergers and has been having a bad spell for the last few weeks. Debts are totalling more than £40k, and they are just mine, not including my husbands.
Anyway, I found this forum last week, just as reality was hitting me and panic was setting in to the point I was having nightmares every night when I was actually able to sleep. It made me really look at my spending. It has only been a few days but already a huge weight has been lifted. Sunday Idid my weekly shop, which would normally be £100+. I actually spent just over £20. I know it wont always be that low as I have made a weekly menu made from a lot of stuff I have had in the cupboards and freezers but it made me feel good. I have also been walking a lot more, not just savingon petrol but helping the diet! lol
I have also done a few of the bingo sites and feel great when I get to bank some money.
I have also had a letter today from the hospital. My op is set for 22 feb. That means I will be back at work for March and getting overtime again. That means I will be able to get my income higher than outgoings again......the only difference this time is I will be able to start paying off all my debts, rather than just survive them.
Sorry for rambling on so much, but I can't believe how much things can turn around in less than a week.
Thank you to everyone that has helped me so far by giving advice, encouragement or even just a listening ear. I look forward to more advice and to the point that I feel I am able to help others.

Sea78

Well done for the good start! I hope that the operation goes well and you recover quickly. If you aren't able to cover your debts from your ordinary income, perhaps it might be worth ringing the CCCS for advice and help? They are free and you don't have to do anything they advise, but they are very good.

Sea xx

tazladytaz

Thanks Sea78.

Dinner tonight, fish chips and mushy peas, but not from the chippy. Apparently chips are made from potatoes which you peel, chop and fry and fish don't come out of the sea already battered! Ok, cheated with the mushy peas but they have een in my cupboard for ages and are tesco value.

This isn't too hard while I am at home. I would like to be able to keep it up when I go back to work. I can't understand why it should be so hard. My mum worked full time, kept a perfect house, cooked from scratch, knitted, sewed and brought up three kids. Maybe that can be one of my own challenged, to find time each week to make own jam, marmalade or a load of pies or something. Not going to start it yet as I have only been doing this a few days and don't want to burn myself out.

kizzykizzywizzy

Sorry you've been having a bad time of it lately Taz,
but it looks like you've had your "lightbulb moment" It's really surprising how far you can get with a little boost from the guys on this site!
Well done on the shopping, I really spend very little on food these days, as although every now & again I do a biggish shop for staples, pasta rice tinned toms etc, I do a lot of batch cooking & I think I eat smaller portions now, rather than get 2 meals out of something I'll stretch it to 3. I find as well if you've got something nice that you've cooked in the freezer, you are less likely to get a takeaway.
Whilst you are off sick, how about doing a bit of comping ? I sold a watch I won on Ebay for £50 today, it can be quite time consuming to enter them, but if you do a few here & there you may win something you need or a little treat or even something you can sell?
I'm with you with the walking too, I walk as much as I can to save petrol, but unfortunately I can't give up my car & it's quite old, so can't downgrade it to make dosh.
You sound as though you are on the right track, especially when you are able to go back to work - take care & the best of luck to you & your family:D

tazladytaz

Not been around much. Had the op, all went well. I am also back at work with lots of offers of overtime. I also had another good result;
My ex-husband has rarely paid any child maintanence. In 7 years he has paid less than £400, for two children. Each time I would get an assessment from the CSA he would give up work so it would go back to zero. I was told by one of the CSA staff that under the new rules he would be assessed as having to pay £70 a month, although at the time he was assessed as needing to pay nothing under the old rules. All I had to do was cancel the claim against my ex and wait 13 weeks before reapplying. That was over 12 months ago. I did have some problems reapplying as there was an arrears on the old case. Therefore I had to say I was happy for the arrears of £165 to be written off. Best move I could have made as yesterday I got a letter through from the CSA saying my ex has been assesed as having to pay £39 a week! Even if he gives up work I will get £5 a week.
This is a good result in some ways but annoying in others as my now husband pays £460 a month for his two children and has been told that under the new system he would only have to pay £270. Unfortunately there is no way he can go to the new system!
Anyway, back to the bright side. I now have £156 extra a month to pay off my debts which means my kids wont have to give up their kickboxing and swimming.

Sea78

That's good news

Sea xx

Keeping_Positive

Goodnews tazladytaz.

Im glad the op went well and look forward to following your path to being debt free. This is a great site!

xx

hypno06

That is good news - £165 will make a good difference.

I hope you are now well on the way to recovery, so that the debt busting can start in earnest.

Head over to one of the challenge threads - make £10 a day is a fab challenge and would get you a good amount of extra money that you can throw at the debt.

Also, if you haven't already done so, have a look at the snowball calculator on www.whatsthecost.com put your debt figures in there and get yourself a debt free date that you can then play around with. I find it is the best motivator ever and really encourages me to find that extra £10 to pay off the debt instead of spending it on "nothing much"!

Good luck, and keep posting - the support from these boards is amazing!

tazladytaz

Thanks to all for the replies. Things seem to be going from good to better at the moment.
I phoned the CSA up to find out when I would get my first payment. The lady I spoke to said she was glad I had phoned as she had been trying to get hold of me. The calculation they had sent me was wrong ( my heart sunk and I thought, oh well I'm going to get nothing again!). The mistake was actually in my favour, my ex is earning more than they thought so will have to pay £226 a month. I can hardly believe it. This will go towards my kids out of school activities and pay for them to go on school outings that I haven't been able to afford before.
I wont say anything to them (just incase) but have opened a seperate account for the money to go straight into. Then if any is left over it will go towrads my credit card bills, (after all they mounted up paying for things for my kids before I got any money)....am I wrong to do this?

kizzykizzywizzy

What fantastic news!!!!
I'm so pleased for you. Glad your op went well too!
I know it's a pain your Hubby has to pay so much for his children from previously, but the fact he is doing it, shows you he is a better man than your EX, so you are a winner there too:D
Enjoy having that little bit extra to treat the kids

chevalier

glad that something is at last going your way. only thing is will your ex actually pay?