How to mitigate potential care home fees

otb666

Having watched one set of parents struggle to manage in their old age at home and other set being cared for in nursing home I know I would prefer to be cared for. Otherwise prepare to be a nuisance/strain/worry for your kids.who might actually want to live their life rather than have the money.

Pollycat

https://forums.moneysavingexpert.com/discussion/comment/82167505#Comment_82167505

OP

This is the solution to your problem.

No care home fees to worry about.

fuzzzzy

https://forums.moneysavingexpert.com/discussion/comment/82167421#Comment_82167421

But really what is the difference between someone needing to use the NHS, an institution most people seem in favour of, for medical care and someone needing social care?

In both cases it is a bit of a lottery as to whether you will need the care.

I'm sure you would not dream of saying to someone with cancer "why do you think other tax payers should pay for your care?"

But it is ok to say it to someone with dementia?

Pollycat

https://forums.moneysavingexpert.com/discussion/comment/82169226#Comment_82169226

Because currently NHS care is free and residential care (unless CHC funded) isn't.

I'm not saying that's fair.

But it's how it is.

FTR…it's not me saying 'if you have cancer your care is free but if you have dementia and require residential care you have to pay for it'.

It's the government.

These sort of threads always cause disagreement.

In fact one regular poster said these threads shouldn't be allowed.

And I agree.

I saw my mum in 2 care homes, funded by social care.

I would use my last penny to pay for care that was very different to that which she received.

The real answer to the OP's question is above.

Keep your house for your children and let them take care of you - quite possibly on a 24/7 basis - for however long you live.

On your death, they will inherit the house/money that you wanted them to have.

fuzzzzy

https://forums.moneysavingexpert.com/discussion/comment/82169232#Comment_82169232

I'm not saying that's fair.

Well that sentiment certainly did not come across in your original post!

Pollycat

https://forums.moneysavingexpert.com/discussion/comment/82169246#Comment_82169246

I regret that you feel that way.

I can't change the way funding for NHS/residential care is organised.

Maybe write to your MP to get them to bring it up…

FYI, it was a quote from another poster who said someone would say it.

So I did.

Maybe the OP could answer the question I posed…

Or maybe you could give your opinion...

do you think other taxpayers should pay for your care home fees whilst your children enjoy the fruits of your labours for 40 or 50 years?

Do you think that is fair?

Sapindus

There is a great deal of difference between the state paying for cancer care or dementia care:

• people have a very real chance of surviving cancer if treated promptly
• cancer treatment is proactive and expensive whereas dementia care is largely just looking after someone
• people tend to need dementia care for longer - cancer generally either kills you or you get better

Personally I would rather lose my possible inheritance and have someone else look after my parent than become their 24/7 carer. The thought of the latter would fill both of us with horror, not least because I earn (and build my own pension by) more than I would get for being their carer. I would basically be using up my inheritance before I even got it.

OP needs to ask their children which they would prefer. If children say they want the inheritance AND not to have to look after OP, it is OP's moral duty to find the cheapest possible form of care for their later years, or take up a dangerous hobby like smoking which is likely to finish them off before dementia strikes.

sheramber

The question the OP asked was how to mitigate potential care home fees?

A discussion on the rights or wrong with the current system is going off track and doesn’t answer the question.

Not everybody who needs to go into a care home suffers from dementia. Some are just physically frail but still sharp of mind.

After nurturing and supporting from birth to adulthood should they not be entitled to some consideration from their children in their senior years?

Why should they have to sacrifice to give their children an inheritance?

Pollycat

https://forums.moneysavingexpert.com/discussion/comment/82169401#Comment_82169401

Does your response answer the OP's question? 🤔

Maybe they should spend some of the money they are trying to retain for their children on this:

"you would very likely benefit from bespoke targeted professional advice, rather than trying to cobble together a strategy based on other people's experiences who don't share your exact circumstances."