Bought house now second thoughts

olb81

So at the moment due to the anxiety issues I can't actually face going near the house. Before going back there I would want to have the house cleaned like a between tenants cleaning so I feel like it's a clean slate. I am deciding whether to do this and finding a company. After that I will see how I feel but if I was to get a mortgage I might as well have bought a better place with 2 bedrooms. I m fine with losing some money , when you feel like I do money doesn't really matter, you just want to feel better and do whatever it takes to get there.

EssexHebridean

You want to make sure that your mental health doesn't lead you to make decisions that will financially hamper you along the road though. 

Are you getting yourself sorted with the relevant treatment for your condition? If that is underway then I wonder whether maybe just sitting tight for a short while and not doing anything until you are on a more even keel might be the right way forwards. 

olb81

Yeah I have been trying with cbt and reading , just lost all my confidence and fear has taken over a lot of my life.
I think it's a case of burnout (trying to make the money) so I got to the 200k and burned myself out. 
It gave me a motivation but now things have changed and I need to find a new motivation.
Work is not a motivation it was only a means to the end. 
I also have very little purpose outside work, I guess that's why my mind has created so much fear as I'm not giving it a purpose.

Yorkie1

It sounds very hard for you OP at the moment. Anxiety can really interfere with one's thought processes and ability to make decisions.

I never thought I'd buy a house owing to anxiety issues. I had to be talked down of a non-literal ledge once I'd put an offer in and panicked at what I'd done. It was the support of family and friends, both in person and otherwise, which helped me ride out the worst waves. Also knowing that, if all else failed, I had an 'out' of selling up, made a difference - even though I didn't use it. 15 years later and I've almost paid off my mortgage. But it took about a year to feel as though the house was 'mine' - and I was already familiar with it as I bought from a friend.

As others have said, if you can find methods of support while you yourself work through the worst of this, then that may help. One step at a time. If your employer offers an employee assistance programme then is there anything there which might help you? If getting it cleaned first will hopefully make a difference to how you feel about the house, then perhaps think about that step but nothing beyond that. Perhaps a friend or family member might go along with you, and do only as much as you can face on any visit. Bear in mind that by not going back to the house, there's a risk that it all builds up more in your mind.

Good luck.