Worried sick about house problems and getting tradesmen

Robertson74

I am a single middle aged man who is living in my late parents dilapidated house. I have never had a job due to having social anxiety and caring for my parents before they died. I am living off an inheritance, which I am paying utility bills and living expenses. I don't have a normal life, but can pay to have some things to the house. I have managed some things, but others I haven't had any luck with.

Would tradesmen be put off someone in my position? I am worried sick by it by it all and worry what is going to happen to me. I live in an area, where there is a lot of wealthy people, who I see these people working for. So maybe they are being choosy?  I also worry about moving to a smaller place and having the same problems.
The thing that gets me with these tradesmen is, that they are so rude. They don't care about my situation. I could give them lots of work, but nothing works.





I bought a new washing machine and the men who delivered it, refused to fit it as my floor is falling in. I have looked at the floor and it appears to very brittle and has woodworm. I want the whole floor replaced and the joists looked at. I also have a damaged plasterboard ceiling which is falling in which I want done at the same time. I have contacted several joiners who haven't got back to me and one is outright ignoring me. I have even tried mentioning them doing several things at once, but nothing works. I could ask a woodworm company, but do they replace floors? I could also ask a handyman, but I don't trust them with the joists.

I now can't wash my clothes and I going to the laundrette.

What really gets to me is that I could give these people lots of work, but their not interested. I have door handles off,a stuck back door, a huge hole in the hall floor etc. I have one really big job- I have a porch,  that has the roof off and all the rain water that gets in has caused the below garage walls to crumble. I want the porch demolished and the garage looked at, but I can't see anyone dong it.

I  am sorry about the rambling post, but these last few days have been really trying for me. I don't know what to do?

caprikid1

Sounds like the house in such poor repair people don't think you have the means to pay for it.

Do you have friends who could recommend someone to assist. 

twopenny

It's not just you. This is happening to most of us normal folk.
There is just so much work around that they will choose the most profitable or less messy ones. It's human nature.

As you have health issues are you in contact with any groups that support and may have contacts in trade or experience that might help?

One problem I had I contacted a local company who were reputable (rather than individual trades) and while it cost not a huge amount more, did an excellent job inspecting before and after which was reassuring.

Another idea is do you have anyone who might meet these people for you with confidence saying they need to get the house in better condition? 

gwynlas

Have you got a relative or friend who could help you put together a list of jobs that need doing?

It sounds as though your house is in need of full renovation if the floors are rotten. They would need to be ripped out and replaced either with new joists and floor boards or having solid floors installed.
The electrics, plumbing and heating might also need renewing.

A general builder could sort out everything for you but the work would need to be completed in a logical order and would not be cheap.

I would be concerned that you might be taken advantage of and financially ripped off.

FreeBear

twopenny said:

It's not just you. This is happening to most of us normal folk.
There is just so much work around that they will choose the most profitable or less messy ones. It's human nature.

In a similar position to the OP in that I have taken over the family estate and have been trying to catch up on maintenance and repairs that should have been done in the previous 50 years.

Have had a few trades in to do some of the work. Sometimes to an acceptable standard - The last plasterer that I used did such a poor job, I thought "I can do better". And after doing a short course, I can. Learning new skills and doing as much of the work as I can has reduced the reliance on trades and perhaps saved quite a bit of money. The downside is it takes a lot longer to finish a job.

Only one trade that I won't skimp on - Gas.

BrilliantButScary

The following link may be helpful:

https://www.citizensadvice.org.uk/consumer/get-more-help/find-a-trader-and-check-you-can-trust-them/

Do you want to stay in your late parents property?
It may be worth speaking to an estate agent and getting the property valued. Would it be a development opportunity for someone else, that would enable you to downsize somewhere, that was in good condition and easier to maintain?

Do you have a trustworthy relative or friend that can help and support you in your current situation?

grumpy_codger

FreeBear said:

twopenny said:

It's not just you. This is happening to most of us normal folk.
There is just so much work around that they will choose the most profitable or less messy ones. It's human nature.

... I thought "I can do better". And after doing a short course, I can. Learning new skills and doing as much of the work as I can has reduced the reliance on trades and perhaps saved quite a bit of money. 
The downside is it takes a lot longer to finish a job. 

Absolutely! Especially for a person that "never had a job due to having social anxiety" and has plenty of time.

FreeBear

grumpy_codger said:

FreeBear said:

twopenny said:

It's not just you. This is happening to most of us normal folk.
There is just so much work around that they will choose the most profitable or less messy ones. It's human nature.

... I thought "I can do better". And after doing a short course, I can. Learning new skills and doing as much of the work as I can has reduced the reliance on trades and perhaps saved quite a bit of money. 
The downside is it takes a lot longer to finish a job. 

Absolutely! Especially for a person that "never had a job due to having social anxiety" and has plenty of time.

Social anxiety can be very debilitating as it can be just one aspect of depression. It could also mean the OP can not participate in any training courses..

I was lucky with the plastering one I did. A small group for only 3 or 4 hours once a week. Also handy that it was free - Might be worth contacting the local Adult Education department in your area to see if they do any similar courses. Mine do basic introductory ones for brick laying, carpentry, tiling, and plastering.

grumpy_codger

FreeBear said:

grumpy_codger said:

FreeBear said:

twopenny said:

It's not just you. This is happening to most of us normal folk.
There is just so much work around that they will choose the most profitable or less messy ones. It's human nature.

... I thought "I can do better". And after doing a short course, I can. Learning new skills and doing as much of the work as I can has reduced the reliance on trades and perhaps saved quite a bit of money. 
The downside is it takes a lot longer to finish a job. 

Absolutely! Especially for a person that "never had a job due to having social anxiety" and has plenty of time.

Social anxiety can be very debilitating as it can be just one aspect of depression. It could also mean the OP can not participate in any training courses.

Well, I'm a keen DIYer - and without any courses, although I learned from some friends. I can do pretty much everything, for myself even gas. I'm not good at plastering (big jobs), but my friend (a professor!) learned plastering from YouTube. 

WIAWSNB

Hi Robertson74.
How much is your current house worth? Yes, it needs work, but if your ultimate intention is to sell it, then don't give yourself the stress of renovating it first. Just sell. There is every chance that the cost of renovation will be similar to the increase in value, so pointless.
When you find a smaller place to buy, then use a full survey to reassure you of its condition.
Why on earth would you want the stress of any other option?!

bjorn_toby_wilde

BrilliantButScary said:

The following link may be helpful:

https://www.citizensadvice.org.uk/consumer/get-more-help/find-a-trader-and-check-you-can-trust-them/

Do you want to stay in your late parents property?
It may be worth speaking to an estate agent and getting the property valued. Would it be a development opportunity for someone else, that would enable you to downsize somewhere, that was in good condition and easier to maintain?

Do you have a trustworthy relative or friend that can help and support you in your current situation?

Very good advice this.

Especially about seeking help. Mental Health issues can make what is already a stressful situation much harder to handle.