Money saving mindset - Finding it difficult to spend

waterman10

I've had a moneysaving mindset for quite a while and have always agreed with Martin's ethos.  I suppose I'm worrying that I'm getting a bit tight and I'd never want to be like that.  I'm generous with other people but not so much with myself.  I think I should allow myself more pleasures.  For example, I was thinking about subscribing to Britbox.  I can easily afford it and it's something I would get some enjoyment out of but I've just been overthinking it and should probably have just got it by now!  

And when I buy something, i usually go for the cheapest option.  But I'm trying to train myself to spend a bit more and buy better quality things when it makes sense and would make an appreciable difference to my happiness.   I was thinking about buying another used car as mine is on it's last legs.  I would usually go for a car with very low tax, insurance, fuel consumption etc like a Citroen C1 or something.  But maybe spending a bit more and getting a newer car that feels more quality and has higher specs would just increase my overall happiness and therefore be worth the extra expense - i suppose that's a question each of us can only answer ourselves.  I know this is a stream of consciousness but i'm just thinking as I'm typing!

I guess the constant negative news reports about the economy and people having to choose between heating and eating have had an effect on me and I should probably read the news less!  

gwynlas

As long as you keep wthin your budget you can buy anything that you want but it might be difficult initially letting go of the ideas you have.

You will know how much you can afford to spend on a new to you car so go for the best you can afford within that price range and enjoy it because you can.

I had similar issues with supermarket shopping but now I can pick up anything within reason knowing that if I was going to eat in a restaurant I might spend the equivalent of a weeks groceries.

Brie

I don't know if you've heard of the decluttering ethos of Marie Kondo.  She has this philosophy to help people rid themselves of excess by picking an item that's cluttering the home and thinking "does this bring me pleasure?"  Essentially if a thing doesn't bring you joy in some way, by having it, touching it, seeing it, then you should sell/throw/give it away.

I've been working on the opposite of this for myself to help manage my "tightness".  A couple of years back when we were on holiday my OH (who's quite the shopper) was happily spending money and I was thinking where can I get an inexpensive souvenir.  I suddenly realised that we were supposed to be enjoying ourselves and I wanted to remember the time away as something special.  I spotted a lovely jewellery shop with lots of handmade items and noticed they had some particularly beautiful earrings.  I looked a few pairs and narrowed it down to one pair that was made by the woman who owned the shop, were very different to any others I had and they just sparked something in me.  I did gasp a bit at the price and considered leaving them there but then said to myself that I deserved to have something really nice.  I wanted them, I could afford them, so I bought them.  And every time I wear them I think of that holiday and how very special it was for us both.  

danny13579

A couple of interesting quotes that may help you when you're thinking this way:

"There's no reason to be the richest man in the cemetery. You can't do any business from there" - Colonel Sanders.

"Annual income twenty pounds, annual expenditure nineteen nineteen and six, result happiness. Annual income twenty pounds, annual expenditure twenty pounds ought and six, result misery" - Mr. Micawber (David Copperfield).

MattMattMattUK

waterman10 said:

I've had a moneysaving mindset for quite a while and have always agreed with Martin's ethos.  I suppose I'm worrying that I'm getting a bit tight and I'd never want to be like that.  I'm generous with other people but not so much with myself.  I think I should allow myself more pleasures.  For example, I was thinking about subscribing to Britbox.  I can easily afford it and it's something I would get some enjoyment out of but I've just been overthinking it and should probably have just got it by now!  

Subscriptions are easy because you can just cancel them if you do not feel that they are value for money, so give it a go for a month and if it does not represent value for money then you can cancel it. 

waterman10 said:

And when I buy something, i usually go for the cheapest option.  But I'm trying to train myself to spend a bit more and buy better quality things when it makes sense and would make an appreciable difference to my happiness.   I was thinking about buying another used car as mine is on it's last legs.  I would usually go for a car with very low tax, insurance, fuel consumption etc like a Citroen C1 or something.  But maybe spending a bit more and getting a newer car that feels more quality and has higher specs would just increase my overall happiness and therefore be worth the extra expense - i suppose that's a question each of us can only answer ourselves.  I know this is a stream of consciousness but i'm just thinking as I'm typing!

I do not like wasting money, so it does have to represent value for money for me to spend, although that may be somewhat subjective. I rarely if ever buy lunch whilst at work, I make and take my own lunch in because I do not see any value in paying £5-8 for something that I would not be happy with anyway. I do not buy coffee when out and about unless I am sitting down to drink it with a friend, I do not see value for money in drinking a decidedly average coffee on a train and paying £4.90 for the privilege. I did recently buy myself a new (second hand) car, I had driven the same car for 13 years (which I also bought second hand). Now I am more comfortable I decided to spend £20k buying a used EV, it is an absolute pleasure to drive and costs me 1.6-1.9p per mile in energy costs. It represents value for money in having a bigger (rather than having to cram things in), more comfortable, easier to drive vehicle. Equally for me there is no value in having a cheaper pint in a 'spoons, because they are almost always awful places. I do not want to have three pints that I will not enjoy for a tenner when I could have three pints that I will enjoy for £16.50.

waterman10 said:

I guess the constant negative news reports about the economy 

I am somewhat concerned about the economy, I am already seeing a slowdown across the board and I deal with a wide range of different sectors and they are all down and contracting. Equally I expect a small ish recession will not be the end of the world and I have made sure that both personally and from a business perspective I am in a position to weather that storm.

waterman10 said:

and people having to choose between heating and eating have had an effect on me and I should probably read the news less!  

I tend to ignore those stories because when I have actually take the time to look at them in any detail in the past it becomes clear that the vast majority of them do not add up, there is often a not insignificant chunk of money that is unaccounted for, or expenses are vastly inflated (e.g. two people are spending £150 a week on food and claim they cannot cut down at all, or that their energy costs are £300 a month for a one bed flat).

saajan_12

Budget Budget Budget - they aren't just for cutting down spending, they can also be useful as a target to increase. I'd lay out amounts based on your income and goals, for Needs, Savings and Wants. The Wants can be small to start off with, and can include outright fun purchases or the difference in upgrading some of the needs.

I still always look for value for money, but after several individual decisions, the budget helps me see over a month if I'm being too conservative, while still feeling secure that I won't go completely off the rails. 

Zanderman

waterman10 said:

I've had a moneysaving mindset for quite a while and have always agreed with Martin's ethos.  I suppose I'm worrying that I'm getting a bit tight and I'd never want to be like that.  I'm generous with other people but not so much with myself.  I think I should allow myself more pleasures.  For example, I was thinking about subscribing to Britbox.  I can easily afford it and it's something I would get some enjoyment out of but I've just been overthinking it and should probably have just got it by now!  

Agree over-budgeting and over-worry about spend can hold you back from enjoying some things unnecessarily! But it's good not to overspend. Just don't make it a misery!

On a point of detail is Britbox still an app in the UK? I thought it had been subsumed into ITVX premium within the UK. As you say it's not expensive, and can be cancelled anytime so no commitment to pay every month, but just checking that you are talking about Britbox and/or are in the UK.

https://support.itv.com/en_us/why-do-i-need-an-itvx-premium-subscription-to-watch-britbox-B1OKrNq26

DullGreyGuy

waterman10 said:

And when I buy something, i usually go for the cheapest option.  

Different strokes for different folks at the end of the day. 

Some people enjoy the hunt for the bargain, some may spend 50p in petrol to save 20p on buying something but if it makes them happy then thats fine. Some want to leave money when they pass, personally tell my mother to spend every penny and enjoy her life. 

Buying the cheapest can at times be good and at other times its false economy if you pay 20% less but it lasts 50% of the time of a mid priced version. 

What's important is having a proper budget and sticking to it... doesnt mean you have to spend every penny but also shouldn't deprive yourself either. 

BridgetTheCat

Daft as it might sound, I have a budget for frivolous spending. Every year on my birthday I put £500 into a savings pot and that’s my fun money for the year. That way I can have a few treats without feeling guilty that I should be saving, but I can’t go overboard with it.

clairec666

I'm similar to the OP - I'm quite generous when buying things for other people, and like to buy from high-quality independent retailers, yet am a cheapskate when it comes to things for myself. I am trying to break away from this habit and be a bit kinder to myself, but I still intend to live within my means and won't dig into my savings even though I can afford to after years of being thrifty.

Yorkie1

Over 15 years ago, when I bought a new bike, I had it custom sprayed a bright sparkly red.

Unnecessary expense? Absolutely.
Does it still make me smile whenever I look at it? Double absolutely.

As others have said, if you can afford it and it will bring you joy etc., then go for it.