Sorting my life out (again)

princess_pea

Blimey, it's been about 5 years since I've used this forum and my life has completely changed. 

2020 = married, 1 DS, full-time job, debt-free, £9k savings
2025 = divorced, 1 DS, 1 DD, full-time carer for my DD who is disabled, £7k debt, £0 savings

Luckily my debts are relatively small and 0% interest... apart from the car which has 1 year left before it goes back. My DD should be eligible for the mobility element of DLA the same month the car goes back so hopefully we'll be able to apply for a motability car. That's the plan anyway.

I've been through a break-up and divorce, a new relationship which has ended in separation and a joint mortgage (and car finance) which I'm now paying on my own. I took redundancy from my full-time job to care for my DD. Since my recent separation I'm navigating the benefits system and having to pull my big girl pants up.

My DD is eligible for A2YO funding and a part-time job has come up which could be ideal for me. Hopefully the stars will align, I'll find my DD a suitable nursery place and be able to go back to work - watch this space.

Hoping to use this diary to keep me on track. My biggest downfalls are spending money on my children and overspending on my credit card. I pay the CC off every month but this just makes me rob from myself the following month. It's currently at £0 which is where it needs to stay!

Sarahwithlove

Welcome back. How does it work with the joint mortgage and car? Do they have an entitlement to it? Or is the property yours in the divorce? What's your plan to pay off the credit cards? 

princess_pea

Sarahwithlove said:

Welcome back. How does it work with the joint mortgage and car? Do they have an entitlement to it? Or is the property yours in the divorce? What's your plan to pay off the credit cards? 

Thanks @Sarahwithlove. The car finance is in my name (one of the stupidest things I have ever done) and the mortgage is joint although he isn’t paying anything towards it. I did get the house valued when he moved out but I don’t know if this will help in future. We aren’t married. 

I’ve stupidly put money on my credit card that I’ll have to chip away at over time. I’ve changed the payments from in full each month to just minimum payments although I can pay around £100 a month towards it.

princess_pea

I haven’t posted on this diary since my first entry in May and since then I’ve accrued over £800 on my credit card! 

I’ve adjusted my signature with the correct calculation for my car finance including the interest I have/ will pay before it goes back next May. I could weep, especially since I only got the car because my ex-partner didn’t have one! I quite happily drove an old banger beforehand. I hate to admit to myself but it was quite simply financial abuse. I would never have taken out a car on PCP if he hadn’t persuaded me. Never again.

The part-time job that had come up was withdrawn before interview so I’m still a SAHM on UC. I did get my daughter into nursery for 2 days a week during school hours, which I think she and I are both ready for. 

I’ve started listing clothes on Vinted and other things on Gumtree. Anything I make from these will go towards my debt.

Things should get easier next year when the car goes back to the dealership. I can’t wait!

Sarahwithlove

I take it there's no way to hand it back early? What's the plan regarding the property? Do you think your ex will allow you to remain living there? Do you get any child support? How long is your mortgage fixed for? 

If you need any benefit help feel free to reach out as I deal with them for my day job. I have to be honest I'm not a huge fan of motability vehicles unless your getting a wheelchair accessible one. Generally most people are better off having the weekly money and saving it towards car maintenance/insurance costs. 

princess_pea

Sarahwithlove said:

I take it there's no way to hand it back early? What's the plan regarding the property? Do you think your ex will allow you to remain living there? Do you get any child support? How long is your mortgage fixed for? 

If you need any benefit help feel free to reach out as I deal with them for my day job. I have to be honest I'm not a huge fan of motability vehicles unless you’re getting a wheelchair accessible one. Generally most people are better off having the weekly money and saving it towards car maintenance/insurance costs. 

I tried to take the car back early but the dealership would only pay £3k less than the outstanding finance, which at this point is what is left in payments anyway. It can go back before the £10k balloon payment which was my original agreement with them. They said themselves they oversold the car to me!

The plan for the property is that I get a job and buy my ex out, which I can’t do until my daughter is in full-time education in 2 years time.  He seems content with that situation. He pays £200 per month in child support, which is going towards the bills. The mortgage is in two sub accounts, one fixed until April 2027 and the other until April 2029. 

My daughter is a wheelchair user but looking at Motability the wheelchair accessible vehicles seem to require an upfront payment. 

princess_pea

I had some good news today! British Gas are refunding me £271.26. I’ve also made £25 on Vinted. Both of these will go towards my credit card debt 😊

dawnybabes

Have you checked to see if you’re eligible for the mobility grant for the vehicle ? 

princess_pea

dawnybabes said:

Have you checked to see if you’re eligible for the mobility grant for the vehicle ? 

No, I’m not sure what that is but will look into it, thanks