young grandchildren and contentious probate

Madcatwomanwithabackpack

Hi, our daughter died in 2023, she was not in a relationship but left two young children by different fathers. We need a letter of administration to sort out her affairs and to ensure the estate is divided equally into trust funds for the children.

After eighteen months of little to no communication from the probate office, I complained and then asked my local MP to step in. The grant of probate was about to be issued to us but Mr RH (the father of our youngest grandchild) put a caveat on the case. Now we are waiting for Leeds probate office to sign the forms so we can issue him with a warning.

It need not have taken two years to get this far but Probate asked us the same questions time and again as if no one was reading the case. We involved a solicitor but they have ignored his letters.

 

If Mr RH is granted probate, the money will not be divided equally between the children (Mr RH has violently threatened our oldest grandchild so you can see what type of person we are dealing with). He will also have access to all our daughter’s records and accounts etc, which means we can’t do what we need to do regarding her affairs (this is also a privacy issue).

I wrote to the head of probate and eventually had a response from one of his admin staff who simply quoted the rules and told me that who ever is granted probate can do what they like with the money. He told me to get a solicitor…

 

We are going around in circles and it seems clear that Probate do not care about adverse circumstances or fairness and ‘have no intention of changing the rules any time soon’.  As things stand an untrustworthy person who was only in our daughter’s life a short time has more entitlement over our daughter’s estate than any blood relative.

Has anyone reading this has been in a similar situation and if so, what was the outcome?

Keep_pedalling

Unfortunately submitting a caveat is cheap and no reason has to be given why it is being requested so if someone wants to make life difficult for the administrators they can just to be difficult. This does not mean he can take over the administration only a court can remove you from this and that is unlikely to happen. 

What you were told by the ‘admin staff’ is rubbish the estate must be administered as per the laws of intestacy so her children inherit her estate.

How old are her children?

Madcatwomanwithabackpack

Thanks for your reply. The children are 13 and 4 yo. We know the intestacy rules but it seems like a free for all - whichever father is granted probate calls the shots with the estate. I'm not really sure what you mean by 'This does not mean he can take over the administration only a court can remove you from this and that is unlikely to happen.' We haven't been granted probate and are fighting to ensure both children get an equal share. 

Flugelhorn

the father of the youngest would only be acting really on behalf of the younger child - as there is another child then TBH it would seem much fairer if you were able to handle it/ 
Back to your MP I reckon

Marcon

Madcatwomanwithabackpack said:

Hi, our daughter died in 2023, she was not in a relationship but left two young children by different fathers. We need a letter of administration to sort out her affairs and to ensure the estate is divided equally into trust funds for the children.

After eighteen months of little to no communication from the probate office, I complained and then asked my local MP to step in. The grant of probate was about to be issued to us but Mr RH (the father of our youngest grandchild) put a caveat on the case. Now we are waiting for Leeds probate office to sign the forms so we can issue him with a warning.

It need not have taken two years to get this far but Probate asked us the same questions time and again as if no one was reading the case. We involved a solicitor but they have ignored his letters.

 

If Mr RH is granted probate, the money will not be divided equally between the children (Mr RH has violently threatened our oldest grandchild so you can see what type of person we are dealing with). He will also have access to all our daughter’s records and accounts etc, which means we can’t do what we need to do regarding her affairs (this is also a privacy issue).

I wrote to the head of probate and eventually had a response from one of his admin staff who simply quoted the rules and told me that who ever is granted probate can do what they like with the money. He told me to get a solicitor…

 

We are going around in circles and it seems clear that Probate do not care about adverse circumstances or fairness and ‘have no intention of changing the rules any time soon’.  As things stand an untrustworthy person who was only in our daughter’s life a short time has more entitlement over our daughter’s estate than any blood relative.

Has anyone reading this has been in a similar situation and if so, what was the outcome?

What a truly horrible time you have had, first losing your daughter at a very young age and now all of this. Your post made very sad reading.

Probate staff are hidebound by the legislation and they can't change it - and there will have been plenty of occasions where they fervently wished they had the freedom to do so.

 Other people's experiences might be 'similar' but they won't be identical, so the outcome isn't going to help, or even give you a clear pointer of what the outcome in this particular case might be. You've got a solicitor, so they are better placed than anyone here to advise, because they have all the relevant facts. 

sheslookinhot

Madcatwomanwithabackpack said:

Hi, our daughter died in 2023, she was not in a relationship but left two young children by different fathers. We need a letter of administration to sort out her affairs and to ensure the estate is divided equally into trust funds for the children.

After eighteen months of little to no communication from the probate office, I complained and then asked my local MP to step in. The grant of probate was about to be issued to us but Mr RH (the father of our youngest grandchild) put a caveat on the case. Now we are waiting for Leeds probate office to sign the forms so we can issue him with a warning.

It need not have taken two years to get this far but Probate asked us the same questions time and again as if no one was reading the case. We involved a solicitor but they have ignored his letters.

 

If Mr RH is granted probate, the money will not be divided equally between the children (Mr RH has violently threatened our oldest grandchild so you can see what type of person we are dealing with). He will also have access to all our daughter’s records and accounts etc, which means we can’t do what we need to do regarding her affairs (this is also a privacy issue).

I wrote to the head of probate and eventually had a response from one of his admin staff who simply quoted the rules and told me that who ever is granted probate can do what they like with the money. He told me to get a solicitor…

 

We are going around in circles and it seems clear that Probate do not care about adverse circumstances or fairness and ‘have no intention of changing the rules any time soon’.  As things stand an untrustworthy person who was only in our daughter’s life a short time has more entitlement over our daughter’s estate than any blood relative.

Has anyone reading this has been in a similar situation and if so, what was the outcome?

This is a matter where he should be reported to the police.