Hello again....

NoMoreExcuses

Hi all (especially those that were so supportive in my darkest times:A )

I just wanted to update and ask a few questions.

After all the drama of worrying about moving from our home into renting - I have to say (3 moves down the line) that leaving the house was probably the best thing that could have happened to me. I got so flustered about getting a house to live in and getting the right one that in the end it wasnt the right one and I have finally moved into another rented house (via a housing association) with 3 kids and the dog (thank god I didnt drown him as per some posters suggestions!).

I am now separated from my husband and very sad about it. But time to move on. He has got an ok job and is refusing to go bankrupt as he thinks he will lose his job if he declares br. He is paying me a feeble amount but he has said that he owes too many people off the record money and thinks he is going to get into serious trouble if he doesnt pay.

So here is my question - can I go BR without my debt being transferred to him and therefore forcing him to go BR? The house has now been sold and I think we owe about £40k from this. In addition to this i think we both owe about £60k from me and £30k from him. I obviously dont want him to lose his job, but i cant ever start again with all this debt hanging over me.

I really want a new start to the year...any tips for where to start?

Happy and stress free New Year to you all. Especially the oldies but goodies, and also the newbies that think nothing will ever be ok again - it will....promise x

NME
x

tigerfeet2006

Hi and welcome back.

Any debts that were joint in both your names will fall on him to repay if you go BR.

There are very few jobs that are affected by BR, what does he do?

NoMoreExcuses

He works in financial recruitment and I have to admit that his contract does actually say that bankruptcy is an instant dismissal, it has its own little sub heading. I tried to reason with him that they cant sack him because our previous business collapsed because of another company going into liquidation. He wont have it.

He is also "certain" that my CC debts and loans will automatically fall to him because I took them out when we were married/together. He said that his friends wife ran up huge debts unbeknownst to him and he had to give her the house as settlement for her cc debts. He seems to think that if I go BR that I will automatically pass my debts to him. Is this a very grey area?

Richard_S

Hi NME,

It's good to hear from you again, but I'd rather it was to let us know that you'd won the EuroMillions Jackpot and were taking us all on a Carribean Cruise.:D

It depends on the nature of the debts as to exactly who is responsible, in the event of bankruptcy by one or other partner. As a rule of thumb, if you both signed an agreement then you're both liable; if one declares bankruptcy then the other is liable. If a loan or card is in one name only then the partner is not at risk.

Sorry to hear that things didn't work out, and I wish you all the best for the future. The only other observation I can make is; if you're going your seperate ways, can you afford to take into account his "off the record" debts. I hate to say it, but that sounds like emotional blackmail to me.

Richard

tigerfeet2006

NoMoreExcuses wrote: »

He works in financial recruitment and I have to admit that his contract does actually say that bankruptcy is an instant dismissal, it has its own little sub heading. I tried to reason with him that they cant sack him because our previous business collapsed because of another company going into liquidation. He wont have it.

He is also "certain" that my CC debts and loans will automatically fall to him because I took them out when we were married/together. He said that his friends wife ran up huge debts unbeknownst to him and he had to give her the house as settlement for her cc debts. He seems to think that if I go BR that I will automatically pass my debts to him. Is this a very grey area?

Unfortunatly if his job is FSA regulated he can be dismissed for goig BR whatever the circumstances.

Richard has given a really good explanation on joint debts etc. Is there many that are? You really can't let him blackmail you into making a descision that is not in your best financial wellfare.

NoMoreExcuses

Hello my lovely friend! Great to "see" you.

No Euro Millions here, just months of living in boxes and having zero internet for ages.

Unfortunately I know who he borrowed money from and they have some very unsavoury friends if you know what I mean - and whatever has happened I dont wish this on him.

Surely some people have borrowed money from friends/relations, especially in times of dire need. I take it the OR doesnt take that into consideration eh?

Is there anywhere I can get an expediture consideration list from? It seems that every time I try and make a list I think of other things later on and it never makes it to a list. I also try and make a list that i think the OR will want to hear rather than what is realistic. I then try living on this unrealistic budget only to fall flaton my face within a week!

tigerfeet2006

Have a look through these to give yourself an idea

http://www.hmrc.gov.uk/manuals/dmbmanual/DMBM800120.htm

http://www.insolvency.gov.uk/freedom...rt2/part_2.htm

Then maybe post it up here and we can see if you have missed anything.

fermi

Hi. Glad to see you are getting on much better.

NoMoreExcuses wrote: »

Unfortunately I know who he borrowed money from and they have some very unsavoury friends if you know what I mean - and whatever has happened I dont wish this on him.

I thought that sounded like the case. Sort of people who might press for repayment using a "big stick with a nail in it".

NoMoreExcuses wrote: »

Surely some people have borrowed money from friends/relations, especially in times of dire need. I take it the OR doesnt take that into consideration eh?

Nope. :rolleyes: They have to stick to the letter of the law.

NoMoreExcuses wrote: »

Is there anywhere I can get an expediture consideration list from? It seems that every time I try and make a list I think of other things later on and it never makes it to a list. I also try and make a list that i think the OR will want to hear rather than what is realistic. I then try living on this unrealistic budget only to fall flaton my face within a week!

For some reason one link Tigerfeet posted isn't working (the OR's keep moving the page :rolleyes:). One that works is here:

http://www.insolvency.gov.uk/freedomofinformation/technical/TechnicalManual/Ch25-36/Chapter31/part7/part2/part_2.htm

But as always the best thing is to post your I&E and we will use our experience to comment on what will be made of it.

fermi

Regarding joint (non secured) debts, there are two good links to info below.

http://www.payplan.com/debt-library/joint-and-several-liability.php

http://www.debtquestions.co.uk/legal_jointseveral.php

With a credit card, normally only one person holds liability. The "account holder" is fully liable, but an "additional" card holder is not. So if only the real account holder goes BR the debt does not transfer to anyone else, but is wiped out.

Richard_S

NoMoreExcuses wrote: »

Hello my lovely friend! Great to "see" you.

No Euro Millions here, just months of living in boxes and having zero internet for ages.

Unfortunately I know who he borrowed money from and they have some very unsavoury friends if you know what I mean - and whatever has happened I dont wish this on him.

Surely some people have borrowed money from friends/relations, especially in times of dire need. I take it the OR doesnt take that into consideration eh?

Is there anywhere I can get an expediture consideration list from? It seems that every time I try and make a list I think of other things later on and it never makes it to a list. I also try and make a list that i think the OR will want to hear rather than what is realistic. I then try living on this unrealistic budget only to fall flaton my face within a week!

Hi NME,

I included this in my previous post and then deleted it, and thought I'd P.M you, but "what the hell; "you're facing it (or your husband is):eek: and I've faced it and lived through it, so no doubt there are others too, so I'll post it here.:rolleyes:

Owing money to banks and financial institutions is bad enough; owing money to friends and family is worse, because no matter what, you have a moral, if not legal obligation to repay it.:eek: Owing money to people who don't bother with the legal system is a completely different "ball game".:eek: :eek:

This wasn't part of our current problems; I've earned and lost a small fortune since then. I was in my late twenties when it happened, and a lot fitter and infintely more arrogant and aggressive than I am now.:D I was part of a business that had done outstandingly well,:beer: and then spectacularly badly, :mad: and when it ultimately went trhough it was mainly bank borrowing and a few very unsavoury trade creditors.:eek:

The fact that it was a Ltd Co. and that I'd lost all my capital and probably my house was completely irrelevant. What they wanted was their cash back, or the cash for the goods supplied. I'm not going to post inflammatory things about the nationality or ethnic group of the creditors but they've always had the reputation of playing "hard ball" when it comes to collecting debts.

I'd had numerous threatening phone calls and eventually arranged a meeting with these guys, where I thought my natural ability to !!!!!!!! would resolve the matter. We met in a pub then went for a meal, and it was menace from the word go.:eek: When it was obvious that I didn't have the money, they just walked out and left me to pay the bill.:rolleyes:

I could have called the police because I knew what was going to happen, but sometimes, these things have to take their course. :cool: They knew where I'd parked my car, and sure enough, 20yards away from sanctuary they stepped out of a door way and laid into me. :eek: I didn't have much to lose so I fought as though my life depended on it and managed to do some reasonable damage,:mad: but nothing like they did to me;:eek: there were three of them. I knew they weren't going to bury me in concrete and once it was over, that would be it.:D It was a painful drive home, and a shower, painkillers and whisky masked most of the damage and that was pretty much the end of it.

If your husband is in a similar situation he has to sort it out himself. My wife knew I'd got problems but if I'd tried to somehow pass them on to her, I wouldn't have blamed her for leaving.:rolleyes: Maybe it was taking what was coming that made her think I was worth staying with;:A it certainly wasn't my good looks.:D

Richard

nomoneyprobs

Richard_S wrote: »

Hi NME,

I could have called the police because I knew what was going to happen, but sometimes, these things have to take their course. :cool: They knew where I'd parked my car, and sure enough, 20yards away from sanctuary they stepped out of a door way and laid into me. :eek: I didn't have much to lose so I fought as though my life depended on it and managed to do some reasonable damage,:mad: but nothing like they did to me;:eek: there were three of them. I knew they weren't going to bury me in concrete and once it was over, that would be it.:D It was a painful drive home, and a shower, painkillers and whisky masked most of the damage and that was pretty much the end of it.

If your husband is in a similar situation he has to sort it out himself. My wife knew I'd got problems but if I'd tried to somehow pass them on to her, I wouldn't have blamed her for leaving.:rolleyes: Maybe it was taking what was coming that made her think I was worth staying with;:A it certainly wasn't my good looks.:D

Richard

Sometimes a mans gotta do what a mans gotta do and take whats coming ( however unjust or wrong it seems )

NME your man / ex man will have to deal with these people sooner or later and if that means going toe to toe then it may be the only way, HE shouldn't be passing the guilt onto you :mad:

I Have dealt with unsavories in the past, sometimes I've won, sometimes I've lost but the fact I stood up and faced them meant inside I won every time.

Good luck with your decision but you should let your head make it, not your heart hun

Ian