Advice and thoughts needed please divorce

TryingVeryHardto

Hi everyone.

 

I would be very appreciative of any advice, views or thoughts on my situation and whether it would be considered fair and meet the criteria of ‘need’ by a judge.

 

My wife and I are divorcing after 16 years. We have 3 children (11,12 and 14).

We have a house with £350,000 equity and around £60K in savings and investments.

We have a few other small assets (car each, watch, motorbike etc) but would match these off against each other to be pretty much perfectly equal.

I earn £50k a year (full time) and at present my wife works 3 days. If she was to work full time in her present type of job (quite easy for her to do) she would earn around £24k. I assume her potential full time earnings are taken into account and not just her current part time??

I have a pension (DB) which I have paid into for 5 years prior to meeting and 16 years since meeting/marriage (total 21years).

I have done quite a bit of reading into how the courts ‘might’ and do look at ‘needs’ of the divorcing parties and especially the children and am hoping they will see this as meeting both our needs and of course most importantly the children’s needs. We are amicable and would like to do this as cheaply as possible (no point paying solicitors for some services if we don’t need to, to help sort out finances). I know we will use them but just want to keep it to a minimum wherever possible.

We will have the children 50/50

I was thinking a 50/50 split of all assets.

We would then both get around £205K.

I would pay child maintenance to her (doing the calc on the government webpage this works about at about £250-300/month.

We would split my DB pension (she does not have one as she stopped working when we had the children) 50/50 for the 16 years we have been married, and we would both keep our pension prior to meeting. This would be split into two pension pots (with the provider) with one being hers and the other being mine. Either that or I would offset my CETV value (for the portion we have been together) against the equity in the house and she would keep the house with a Mesher Order on it to pay out my remaining once the youngest turns 18 or before if we mutually agree.

We would both be able to afford a small 4 bedroom house locally (with a mortgage each) on the asset split (£205K) she would need to pretty much max out her mortgage capacity and I would also be given the child maintenance payment.

She would also claim the child benefit for the 3 children to further boost her household income.

I know this is not taken into account, but my parents have given us over £100K during our marriage (some of which was from my grandmother when she passed away – my father inheritance) which we have in the equity of the house. It worries me to think that she will get even more if the asset split is not 50/50.

I hope that any judge would see that she must support herself once we are divorced and should therefore work full time (there is no reason why she couldn’t) and not only work part time and therefore claim a higher asset split due to her reduced income working part time. She has said that she would/try to claim UC but surely this is not right as she is not maximising her income. Anyway that is not the point of this….although it might get a few interesting replies….rightly so in my view! If you can work…..work! Don’t get me wrong if she NEEDS to then that is what it is there for (only until she can fully support herself though).

Anyway, do you think a judge would see this as fair (50/50 split). I may have VERY slightly (£150/200) more disposable income each month.

As stated, my concerns are that a judge would see her part time wage and as a result her reduced (or non-existent on part time wage) mortgage capacity and award her more of the asset share. Surely, they would consider what she could earn (full time)? Also, that I will possibly have slight more disposable income once all bills are paid (really not very much more at all though) so would this small difference make a difference in asset share?

Personally, I think this is fair. Although it irks me that she will keep my part of my Dad's inheritance but it is what it is I'm afraid. At least my kids will enjoy some of it as it will help her buy a house which they will live in for a little while.

 

Any views, advice or personal accounts would be GREATLY received.

Thank you!

Brie

My understanding is that pensions will be split 50/50 and take in to account state pension as well as work pensions for both of you.  How much your accumulated prior to marriage is, as far as I know, irrelevant.  

As to whether she works full time or part time...one would need to ask why she works p/t.  If it's so that she can be available for the kids, to be at home when they get out of school, take them to their sports/cultural stuff and doctor's appointments then she'll need to continue p/t.  Otherwise she/you/someone will need to make up the difference.  

Also - if you make more than twice as much as her how come you only have a small amount more disposable income?  That sounds a bit creative in the accounting department.  Unless you are going to continue to pay all the household bills for wherever she (& the kids) are living.  

As for the inheritance from your father....has he died?  If not it's not an inheritance it is a gift.  And if he/mom needs the money at some future date to pay for care costs then the local authority might look to both of you to pay that back.  Not sure if that will make you feel better or not.

TryingVeryHardto

Brie said:

My understanding is that pensions will be split 50/50 and take in to account state pension as well as work pensions for both of you.  How much your accumulated prior to marriage is, as far as I know, irrelevant.  

As to whether she works full time or part time...one would need to ask why she works p/t.  If it's so that she can be available for the kids, to be at home when they get out of school, take them to their sports/cultural stuff and doctor's appointments then she'll need to continue p/t.  Otherwise she/you/someone will need to make up the difference.  

Also - if you make more than twice as much as her how come you only have a small amount more disposable income?  That sounds a bit creative in the accounting department.  Unless you are going to continue to pay all the household bills for wherever she (& the kids) are living.  

As for the inheritance from your father....has he died?  If not it's not an inheritance it is a gift.  And if he/mom needs the money at some future date to pay for care costs then the local authority might look to both of you to pay that back.  Not sure if that will make you feel better or not.

Thank you for your comments.

She wants to continue to work part time. There is no reason really that she should not be able to work full time or at least increase her hours. I will be taking the children to school, collecting them every day (even when they are with her) and doing 50% of the clubs etc as I will have them 50% of the time.

In terms of me only have very slightly more than her it may actually turn out that I will have less as she will be able to claim around £1000 UC + Child benefit + wages + child maintenance from me.

She will (If she stays at the Family home) be mortgage free and will only have the household bills to pay. I, on the other hand will have around £1000/month mortgage (on a new place big enough for myself and the children when they are with me) + household bills + child maintenance (this equates to approx. £2550/month). Doing some quick calculations I will be spending just under half my monthly salary on the mortgage alone.

My father is still alive and as I said I understand that this money from his inheritance (when his mother/my grandmother) died will be classed as a family gift. I am OK with that.

RAS

If you have 50:50 care that reduces the amount of maintenance you pay. Go to the CMS calculator.

TryingVeryHardto

RAS said:

If you have 50:50 care that reduces the amount of maintenance you pay. Go to the CMS calculator.

Yes, thank you. I have done this and it comes out at around £300/month due to my wage being higher than hers. Although once all her addition income is added (UC, Child benefit, maintenance) she will have a monthly income which will be pretty much the same as mine......although I'll have a large mortgage to pay and maintenance.

I just want this to be fair. I dont want more than my entitlement but equally don't want to be shafted (too badly).

We are looking into her keeping the house (with a Mesher order on it) and me buying something else (with a £170000 mortgage!). She will then live in the house for a couple of years (worse case until the youngest is 18 so could be 8 years) and then selling and I will take my remaining equity and she will keep the rest.

This hinges on her being able to get a £50k mortgage as I will need that money plus the savings to put down a deposit large enough for me to be able to have a house for myself and the children. Obviously the money I take now (savings and 50K from her mortgage) would be taken off my equity share (when the house is sold) so she would get it all back once she sells. She would then have enough to buy a house (mortgage free) from her considerable equity. Somewhere in the region of £240000 with no mortgage or £290000 with what is remaining of her 50k mortgage.

elsien

Brie said:

My understanding is that pensions will be split 50/50 and take in to account state pension as well as work pensions for both of you.  How much your accumulated prior to marriage is, as far as I know, irrelevant.  

As to whether she works full time or part time...one would need to ask why she works p/t.  If it's so that she can be available for the kids, to be at home when they get out of school, take them to their sports/cultural stuff and doctor's appointments then she'll need to continue p/t.  Otherwise she/you/someone will need to make up the difference.  

Also - if you make more than twice as much as her how come you only have a small amount more disposable income?  That sounds a bit creative in the accounting department.  Unless you are going to continue to pay all the household bills for wherever she (& the kids) are living.  

As for the inheritance from your father....has he died?  If not it's not an inheritance it is a gift.  And if he/mom needs the money at some future date to pay for care costs then the local authority might look to both of you to pay that back.  Not sure if that will make you feel better or not.

Many parents work full-time and still manage to do all these things. so given the childcare will be 50-50 and the age of the children, that seems to be an unreasonable assumption to me.