Is it worth letting M&S know about an embarrassing experience in thier Food Hall?

[Deleted User]

A bit of background so please be kind enough to bear with me:  I took two buses to get to a good and well stocked M&S Food Hall.  When I arrived I asked an assistant at the entrance iif there was a customers' toilet, she said that there was and very kindly directed me to it.  When I reached it there was a barrier up and a notice to say that the customers' toilets were not in use.

I was about to leave and the pleasant assistant who had directed me came and (I did not ask her) very kindly offered to let me in.

In the middle of my "ablutions" a far from pleased  member of staff came in and, in a really quite a strongly accusing tone,  said that the toilets were not in use.  I got a bit of a fright and said that a member of staff had let me in.  I think she asked me "who" but I was a bit flustered at the time.  She left but seemed to have assumed that I had disregarded the notice,removed the barrier and let myself in.

When I attempted to leave the barrier at the door had been reinstated.  The only way I could see to get out was to crawl under the barrier - embarrassingly in sight of other shoppers who could not avoid seeing me.

I had been accused of something I had not done and was upset to be held in with the barrier having been reinstated making it difficult for me to exit.  I felt as if I was being punished.  Soon after I saw the assistant who had very kindly let me in and the other  assistant was with her.  I can't remember exactly what was said to me but I just said that I got quite a fright - maybe I said "it was a bit of a shock" but I cannot remember.  I hurriedly picked up just two items and abandoned the rest of my shopping list.  I was grateful to pay and quickly leave the store. 

Even if I had disregarded the barrier and let myself in (and I had not done this) it was humiliating for the assistant to judge me and, it seemed, make  it difficult for me to get out.

It is difficult because, on one hand, the young assistant was helpful and kind yet the other assistant was not pleasant in her behaviour towards me.

Part of me wants to complain but I don't want the young assistant to get into trouble.  I definitely did not ask to be let in when the notice and barrier were up.

Right now, at home I still feel quite upset because the second assistant knew I was in there and I don't think she treated me respectfully. What would you do?

LightFlare

As “embarrassing” as it may have been - it could conceivably have been a whole lot worse.

Just forget and move on

DullGreyGuy

[Deleted User] said:

In the middle of my "ablutions" a far from pleased  member of staff came in and, in a really quite a strongly accusing tone,  said that the toilets were not in use.  I got a bit of a fright and said that a member of staff had let me in.  I think she asked me "who" but I was a bit flustered at the time.  She left but seemed to have assumed that I had disregarded the notice,removed the barrier and let myself in.

When I attempted to leave the barrier at the door had been reinstated.  The only way I could see to get out was to crawl under the barrier - embarrassingly in sight of other shoppers who could not avoid seeing me.

I had been accused of something I had not done and was upset to be held in with the barrier having been reinstated making it difficult for me to exit.  I felt as if I was being punished.  Soon after I saw the assistant who had very kindly let me in and the other  assistant was with her.  I can't remember exactly what was said to me but I just said that I got quite a fright - maybe I said "it was a bit of a shock" but I cannot remember.  I hurriedly picked up just two items and abandoned the rest of my shopping list.  I was grateful to pay and quickly leave the store. 

Ultimately we dont know why they had a closed sign up, the real issue is with the first assistant who shouldn't have offered to let you in. 

The second member of staff made a correct statement of fact that the toilets were closed. I've certainly seen people ignore such signs and make their way in regardless. You told them that a member of staff had let you in and they left without further argument. 

It wasnt unreasonable for them to close the barrier, the toilets were presumably closed for a reason beyond them just being mean to customers and an open barrier is almost certainly going to increase the chances of others deciding to ignore it than a closed one. 

The fact you became flustered and for some reason were unable to open the barrier that the member of staff seemingly did open without challenge isnt really their fault. Presumably you were in a rush or didnt want to be a spectacle behind the barrier so crawled under rather than waiting for a passing member of staff to release you. 

I can sympathise with being caught short in a shop without operational customer toilets but were such a complaint to land on my desk the response would be to remind staff that they are to police the barrier and not allow customers in so the "very kind" assistant would be the one in trouble from your complaint. Ironically I was told to ignore the barrier (not locked) in M&S long time ago for the customer toilets but on opening the door (a single cubical type setup) and seeing all the poo on the floor and walls it was obvious why it was closed and didnt use it. 

[Deleted User]

Okell's respoinse and some of my replies to the response seem to have disappeared.

KittenChops

Why did the second assistant block you in with the barrier, when she knew you were in the toilet?  That is worth a complaint in my opinion.

[Deleted User]

KittenChops said:

Why did the second assistant block you in with the barrier, when she knew you were in the toilet?  That is worth a complaint in my opinion.

Thanks for replying KittenChops. I  did not physically see her as she left.  I assume she reinstated the barrier because I very quickly washed my hands and attempted to leave straight away.  I felt as if I was being punished.  I believe it would have been more reasonable for her to wait for me and let me out - perhaps "double checking" my account that her colleague had offered to let me in.

Maybe if I hadn't been so flustered I would have managed to undo the barrier myself.  I was embarrassed and other customers could see me as I stood behind the barrier trying to undo it.  I decided to crawl out under the barrier. There was no member of staff there to ask although I saw the first assistant and the second assistant very soon together very soon after.  It will never come to this, because I won't let it, but I'm sure M&S CCTV would confirm my truthful account.  It would also show who reinstated the barrier when I was still in there.  Maybe she thought I would know how to undo the barrier - assumning as she seemed to - that I had undone it in order to gain access.  It was her colleague who let me in.

Maybe I was inordinately upset but I really just wanted to leave as quickly as possible.  The second assistant must have known I was still in there but I was out very quickly, - she  had gone and the barrier had been reinstated.

I don't know what happened to the response Okell made to my post, and I did reply to it, but it seems to have disappeared.