New Year, New Me

Flick85

Right.

I've got myself into a bit of a financial mess. Now is the time to sort it out.

My current situation: 

• Credit card balances: £20,661.37
• ZOPA loan: £23,355.57 [took out this loan to consolidate previous credit cards... and then maxed them out again. Foolish in the extreme. Sigh.]
• Pay in 3 loans: £1,129.16

Total debt: £45,146.10

Ouch.

I've just made a very detailed income & expenditure spreadsheet for next 5 years. I've worked out that if I live a frugal 2025 then I'm confident that I can repay £15,000 of the debt this year.

I've got 2 big expenses this year to manage. The first of these is my first holiday in 8 years for my 40th in May. I've got £600 left to pay on that bill, and will need to pay to get to the airport etc. but, the holiday itself will be fairly cheap as I'm all going all inclusive and plan to do nothing but sit on a sun bed, read and sip cocktails with the occasional dip in the pool. 

The second big expense is £500 on a BSL training course in Feb. I started learning BSL this year, and it's sparked a real interest. So, in 2025 I'm going to do my level 1 qualification. And, by 2029 I'm hoping I will be a fully qualified BSL interpreter as a side-hustle/additional income source. So I see this is an investment in training and my future.

Anyways, more on that another time. Let's finish setting the financial scene. 

My takehome pay is £3,585.60 p/m and my 'regular expenses' (which includes mortgage, all bills, student loan, car payment, car insurance, spotify etc. etc. etc.) comes to £1,841.59 p/m. That's high, but it does include £190 p/m student loan (til Dec 25), £55 p/m loan for my phone (til May 25), £62.50 ikea loan (til Apr 26) and £20 sofa loan (til Apr 27). So, that will go down ~£310 p/m in next 18 months. Cannot wait to finish paying my student loan!

The biggest lifestyle change to achieve these goals is stopping buying my lunch at work. I usually spend £8 every weekday, and that's not going to be feasible in a frugal 2025. And no more coffees purchased at work either. Or takeaways. I think that will save me in the region of £200 a month which I can throw at the credit cards. 

I've already cancelled or reduced all of the regular expenses that I feasibly can while maintaining some semblance of sanity in the process. To average debt repayment of £1,250 a month I'm going to need to live off £500 p/m 'flexi' spends - for me this incudes things like groceries, pet supplies, entertainment, petrol, hair and beauty. Basically, anything that isn't a fixed/planned expense.

On top of that £500 p/m, I do spend £100 p/m on therapy (my brain is quite broken), £55 p/m on an osteopath (ongoing back issues) and £84 p/m on a cleaner (2 hrs per fortnight). I might have to cancel the cleaner, but that is an absolute last resort for me. I know that sounds frivolous when I'm in the financial mess that I am. But, I'm  AuDHD, so the regularity of a fortnightly cleaner visit means my house stays presentable as I'm forced to keep on top of the tidying. 

Well, that's it for now. I need to make some lunch and pop to the supermarket for milk, sunflower oil and absolutely nothing else. Let's start this thing as we mean to go on!

Flick85

Didn't make it as far as the supermarket and now it's too late (totally forgot that it was a Sunday!) Somehow I'll have to cope without milk til tomorrow, I guess. But, on the plus side, that means today has been a NSD.

I've also made £38 today by re-selling a gig ticket I bought last year. I really love this band, and they haven't toured the UK in years, so I bought the ticket aaaages ago to see them in London. But, I was looking to book the travel and a hotel last night and realised that it just wasn't a feasible and realistic trip for various reasons. So, I decided to list the ticket for resale and see what happened.... and someone has bought it!

Slightly gutted to be missing the concert. But, they'll hopefully tour again and I do have a few other gigs lined up this year in Manchester and Leeds - which are more realistic locations for me to get to. A couple will involve hotel trips, but I've already booked and paid for those last year. So, only the train trip costs to add in for those ones. 

Trying to balance living an enjoyable life while staying frugal is going to be my big challenge I think. I was thinking that if I tried to work from home more that would save on my fuel costs (and make it easier not to buy lunches at work!) but I live alone, so if I don't go to work, I rarely see other humans that I know. 

FootyFanDan

I didn't want to read and run. Welcome and happy new diary. I also struggle very much with the lunch/coffee on work days and although I did get better at this, I have noticed the frequency of this is increasing again so hoping like you to get a grip on this.

Wishing you the best of luck on your frugal 2025 journey.

Flick85

Yesterday didn't end up as a NSD because I bought a ticket to see a comic in Liverpool in March.

The reasons I bought it are a little complicated - I was supposed to be going to a gig with a friend, but I didn't want to stay at his place overnight as I'm too old for sofa-sleeping, and sometimes he can be a bit flirty so I'd pre-booked a hotel in Manchester for the night to make sure he didn't get the wrong idea if we had to share a bed. Well, my concerns about his intentions were correct... and after rejecting his romantic advances, let's just say that friend is no longer a friend. Sigh. He's rescinded the ticket he bought me, and I'm no longer going to that gig. I tried to get a refund on the hotel or change the dates, but the hotel wouldn't help. So, rather than lose out on the £140 for the hotel entirely, I figured I'd see if I could find any other shows in the area for that night - and, a comic I enjoy is doing a gig in Liverpool. So, it was £28 to book a ticket to see him. It's an extra £10 return on the train from Manc, but totally doable after the show and should be a fun evening out. 

I've just been to the supermarket and actually stuck to my list - which rarely happens! £14.95 spend which should do me until the weekend at least as I've still got lots of leftovers from hosting Christmas. Just realised we never even opened the Yule log, so that's happening later today for sure I think I'm going to go to the pub on the 2nd as it's a friend's 40th, but I'll be driving so no alcohol will mean a fairly cheap night out. Other than that (and the usual direct debits) there should be no need for me to spend any money the rest of this week. 💪

I've listed a few items on Vinted this morning. Keeping the prices relatively high for now... and will see how that goes. And, as I was driving to the supermarket a competition came up on the radio - I never listen to the radio (for some reason my phone wasn't connecting properly) and I never enter these sorts of things, but I had £5 in credit on my GiffGaff account leftover from when I went to Austin for work 18 months ago, so I figured why not? Fingers crossed for that! 

I think I'll make a post later with 12 challenges I'm going to set myself for the new year. Some financial, some life-related, some work-related. 

greenglove

Good luck with your journey! Buying lunch at work was one thing I have almost managed to get out of the habit of recently. However I was then spending my entire evenings sometimes making dinner, then also preparing a lunch for the next day. This becomes draining and tiresome so we decided to just always cook 4 portions of a dinner meal and use the leftover 2 portions for next days lunch. Additional tasty fruit and snacks make lunch something to look forward to!

Flick85

Thanks!

I already tend to batch cook as cooking for just one is difficult. So, I usually make enough for 2 or 3, and then have leftovers for the next few evening meals. If I’m doing lunches as well, I think I’ll just try to plan it so that I’m cooking lunches on the evenings that have low effort teas (if that makes sense…).

The good news is that EasyJet have FINALLY agreed to pay my hotel and train ticket expenses from when they cancelled my flight home from a work trip to Milan in September. So that’s £330 coming back to me without having to attempt to make a claim on the work travel insurance. 

I’ve also had a couple of loan offers today which I’m seriously considering. I’ve done the consolidation loan thing before and it failed - which is how I’ve ended up where I am now. But, I wasn’t tracking income and expenditure, nor thinking about finances in quite the same way. I’ll do some more number crunching before I decide, but the rates I’m being offered are less than my credit card rates. So would save money in long run, and give me a little more wiggle room in short term. 

I’ve also made £13.50 on Prolific. It’s weird doing it from the participant side as normally I’m the one posting studies (though, not on Prolific as I don’t have any budget for my research!)

New Year’s Goals and challenges to be posted tomorrow. Today has been a NSD - unheard of for New Year’s Eve, but I’m determined NOT to waste money on a takeaway this evening. So, whipping up a risotto for tea.

Hope everyone has a great new year, whatever you’re up to :-)

Flick85

Warning - self indulgent moan following…

So, I didn’t end up sleeping til gone 2 am last night. And not because I was out partying and having fun, because I was sad about spending yet another New Year’s Eve alone. Insomnia is my biggest “mental illness episode incoming” red flag so going to have to keep an eye on this.

I turn 40 this year, and my life is just not how I expected it to be. Yes, I’ve got plenty of friends, but no one especially close since my best friend died 7 years ago. And I’ve been single now for… well nearly 20 years, despite my best efforts on dating sites and the like. I’ve got a good life in many ways, but it’s just so lonely, especially at this time of year. I’ve been wondering if I made the wrong choice in rejecting my friend’s advances the other day, but after being single for so long I don’t want to end up with just anyone… and I know that he and I are just not compatible long term - I think he’s looking for a live in maid and life coach more than a partner, and that’s just not what I’m out here looking for! 

Like, my mum and step-dad visited for Christmas, and left on the morning of the 27th. I haven’t seen a single human being (outside of strangers at the supermarket) since then. I’ve texted a few friends and family members of course, but they’re all busy with their own lives and/or not local to me so no opportunities to meet up. And it sucks to spend so much time alone.

I think I’m going to force myself to go to a friend’s 40th drinks tomorrow evening even though I’m feeling pretty down in the dumps. We’re not particularly good friends - it’s someone I work alongside and we’re in a group chat on WhatsApp - but I feel like I really need to see some human beings! It’s a bit of a weird one as I get the distinct impression the birthday girl doesn’t like me much, she never talks to me, and often seems to actually go the opposite way to avoid me. If I ever organise anything for the group - which I try to do fairly often - she never responds at all, and never shows up. But, if I don’t go tomo, I won’t see any humans til I’m back at work on the 6th - and I’m already going stir crazy. So, I’m going to force myself on them whether they like it or not. 

Though, that said, looking at the list of people going to these drinks, it’s going to be 5 couples and me. Woohoo for being the 11th wheel 😬 but at least it’ll be a cheap night as I’ll be driving so just the non-alcoholic drinks for me.

I really hoped to wake up this morning with a positive mindset going into the year ahead. But, instead I just feel sad. My reality is that this year is going to be really tough on a few levels:
1) my workload for next 6 months is staggering and slightly terrifying;
2) turning 40 is a big milestone that I didn’t think I’d ever reach but certainly never expected to be doing by myself; 
3) I need to get on top of my financial situation.

It’s on days when I feel like this that the temptation to spend money to make myself feel better is especially strong. Like, what if I spent £40 on this thing for the house, that would make me happy! But, the reality is that stuff doesn’t make me happy. 

Instead, I think I’m going to do some work in my garden. And clean the kitchen. And then cook a risotto for tea. And do some laundry. Three of these will make me happier than the laundry, but I’ve got a pile waiting. And the good news is that none of these plans involve spending any money!

What I’m absolutely NOT going to do today is any online shopping in an attempt to spend my way out of this sadness by buying pretty things. Nope. Not doing it.

Depending on how that all goes today, and what mood in left in, I might actually go to work on campus tomorrow. I’ve got to drive into the city for the drinks anyway, and at least it’ll give my day some purpose which has been distinctively lacking since my parents went back home. I’ve got so much work on atm, that it might be nice to get some stuff done while very few people are about and email traffic is slow.

Promise the next post will be more positive. I just needed to get some of this out somewhere before I spent the day crying in bed.

RedLipstick

Happy New Year! Sending lots of hugs your way, sweets and a box of tissues! 

Work in the garden sounds exciting, go for it if the weather allows!

Do you have any local communities you could join? Where I live we have libraries, churches, and cafes, they organise lots of wee events, community classes etc. Most of the time it's the elderly I see there but I've joined for some calligraphy or knitting classes in the past, it was very fun! One of my friends joined open uni for some courses, it's not the same as meeting people face to face of course but it's keeping her entertained, maybe something worth looking into? You'll get to meet some like minded people and also upskill on the go.

Flick85

Thanks @RedLipstick. Spent an hour in the garden and despite the cold it definitely improved my mood. Have decided to take tomorrow off as planned and do some more work on it - it’s really in need of it, and it’s good for my soul.

I’ve also signed up to do one of the local walks on Sunday with a group. I commented that I was new to the group and would like to car share to the start and the leader offered to give me a lift. So, hopefully that will be slightly more comfortable for my extremely anxious brain than just turning up to a random location and walking up to a group of strangers.

I have successfully spent absolutely no money today 💪

Flick85

Okay, challenges and goals for 2025.

1. 200 NSDs
2. 15k debt reduction
3. Reading for pleasure: 12 print/kindle books and 12 audiobooks
4. Reading for work: 12 articles per month and at least 12 books in the year
5. Achieve BSL Level 1
6. Use exercise bike for 30 mins at least 3 days per week
7. Do 30 mins per day walking/activity minimum 5 days per week
8. Max 4 lunches bought on campus per month
9. Max 4 coffees bought on campus per month
10. Daily DF diary post including 3 daily gratitudes
11. Average 1 fun ‘big’ thing per month 
12. Make connections in my town 

I think that a couple of these need a bit more explanation.

In terms of challenge 11, I'm very much working on the basis that I do need to have fun things in life as well as being frugal, or I'll end up giving up on this entirely. So I'm going to roughly limit myself to an average of 1 fun thing per month (apart from during my 40th birthday month in May). 

I actually have a lot of friends turning 40 this year, so atm this looks like:

• January - weekend trip to London for a friend's 40th
• February - nothing
• March - comedy gig in Manchester 
• April - comedy gig locally
• May - 2 gigs in Leeds, my 40th bday holiday in the sun, my 40th bday party in London
• June - weekend trip to London for a bunch of joint-40ths 
• July - gig locally, gig in Manchester
• August - possibly camping down south with friends for another 40th if I can figure out the logistics
• September - musical in Manchester
• October - nothing
• November - concert in Manchester
• December - nothing special.

Apart from the train tickets, camp site and (hopefully minimal) costs while I'm away on some of these trips, this is pretty much all paid for. 

For 12... well, I moved out of the city id lived in for 19 years to a smaller town 10 miles away 2 years ago. This was a great move in many ways - the house I've bought is perfect for me, mortgage is reasonable, commute is 22 minutes in the car. But, most of my local friends are still based in the city. And, I don't really have any good connections to this town that I live in yet. 

The house I bought is on an estate where there isn't much community. And, tbh I spend 5 days a week in the city for work, and often go over there at the weekend too. I'd like to get more involved in the local community, and make friends out here. I've been part of a 'walk and talk' FB group for the town for a while, but I've never had the confidence to join them. This year, this all changes. I’ve signed up to go on a walk with them on Sunday! It's difficult when you're AuDHD to make new friends, but I feel like I'll be happier if I do. 

So, that’s the plan for 2025. Some slightly ambitious challenges, but better for me to aim high I think! And hopefully if this leads to a happier, more content me, then my over-spending issues will also resolve.

Lonelygambler

Hey, bookmarked and following. 

Good luck for this year.