Really need some help, no idea where to start.

KimmiLou22

Hi all, this is the first time i am writing this down and it feels so daunting. 

First of all i take full responsibility for the situation we are in, i have lied to my fiance about money (ie not paying bills) i have hid post from him, kept debts from him, not told him when we are in financial difficulty

I am horrendous with money, if i have it, i want to spend it,i live for here and now and worry about the rest later, i have ADHD and anxiety and worry if he knows about issues we are having he will stress like me or will leave me so i try and deal with it myself and just dig us into a bigger hole. 

So i have made a decision ( he knows) to sort out our finances but i have no idea where to start i will list all our debts below and whats going on with them 

CCJ- my name- currently paying £100 a month total £13800
Moneybarn-joint- (car was repossessed) no payment plan £6380 
Barcalycard- his name- with Wescot- paying £35 monthly- £2200
Fluid- his name- no payment plan set up- £2598- not able  to use this but not been sold 
Capital One- his name- £1025 sold to lowell- paying £50 a month 
I have 3 debts with Lowell totaling £1500 that i pay £50 too 
EE-£821- my name sold to EPFS- £10 a month 
Salary Finance- ACI- £10 per month-£209 
Moorcroft- severn Trent- £2200- pay £45 a month 
Council Tax- £3000 in debt- £287 AOE order on OH wages 
Moorcroft- £46- Ebay- no payment plan 
DCBL-£189- no payment plan

I am sure there is more but my credit report doesnt show some and they are still writing to me asking for money 

We earn a decent income but i just get lost in amongst it all,

someone please help me 

  

sourcrates

Hi,

Are you homeowners, or do you rent, other??

As there are debts in both your names, separate solutions would be required.

An SOA would tell us more, the stoozing link is in my signature, if you can complete that, it would give us a better idea of what we are dealing with.

ManyWays

What is the debt with DCBL? 

I dont think you should take full responsibility, your fiance could hardly have missed a car being repossessed, an attachment of earnings order on his wages or that many of his credit cards no longer work? 

Would it not be sensible for you two to decide to tackle this together, as @sourcrates says you may need different solutions but you could still work as a team to get plans that both of you understand are needed? 

KimmiLou22

He is aware of everything now, he was fully aware of the credit cards but i would miss payments which would cause them to be defaulted, once i get home i will do the SOA 

I have some debts from years ago which are not showing on my credit record

Also the moneybarn debt on my OHs credit report is now showing £0 and closed but a company just wrote to him. 

Im gonna be honest, there are some letters i have not opened and just thrown away, if something is not showing on my credit report, how do i go about finding it?

sourcrates

KimmiLou22 said:

Im gonna be honest, there are some letters i have not opened and just thrown away, if something is not showing on my credit report, how do i go about finding it?

You don`t, you wait until they write to you again.

Depends how old these debts are, they only show on file for 6 years, if you haven`t made payment or acknowledged them in writing for any period of 6 years since they defaulted, they may be statute barred by now.

KimmiLou22

for example, moneybarn on my credit report is showing settled as of 31/10/2024

i havent made any contact with Moneybarn nor this new company that have contacted me, and the new complany arent showing on my credit report 

how can i find out if something is statue barred, im sorry for all the questions

KimmiLou22

we also have a 1200 overdraft with TSB 

And 4 device loans with Vodafone which are all up to date 

KimmiLou22

[font=courier new][b]Statement of Affairs and Personal Balance Sheet[/b][b]

Household Information[/b]

Number of adults in household........... 2

Number of children in household......... 6

Number of cars owned.................... 0[b]

Monthly Income Details[/b]

Monthly income after tax................ 2300

Partners monthly income after tax....... 1450

Benefits................................ 2100

Other income............................ 0[b]

Total monthly income.................... 5850[/b][b]

Monthly Expense Details[/b]

Mortgage................................ 0

Secured/HP loan repayments.............. 0

Rent.................................... 1025

Management charge (leasehold property).. 0

Council tax............................. 0

Electricity............................. 100

Gas..................................... 160

Oil..................................... 0

Water rates............................. 45

Telephone (land line)................... 0

Mobile phone............................ 73.08

TV Licence.............................. 0

Satellite/Cable TV...................... 17.99

Internet Services....................... 45

Groceries etc. ......................... 1000

Clothing................................ 200

Petrol/diesel........................... 160

Road tax................................ 0

Car Insurance........................... 63.65

Car maintenance (including MOT)......... 0

Car parking............................. 10

Other travel............................ 52

Childcare/nursery....................... 0

Other child related expenses............ 0

Medical (prescriptions, dentist etc).... 11.35

Pet insurance/vet bills................. 14.3

Buildings insurance..................... 0

Contents insurance...................... 15

Life assurance ......................... 50

Other insurance......................... 0

Presents (birthday, christmas etc)...... 100

Haircuts................................ 0

Entertainment........................... 95

Holiday................................. 0

Emergency fund.......................... 100[b]

Total monthly expenses.................. 3337.37[/b]

[b]

Assets[/b]

Cash.................................... 0

House value (Gross)..................... 0

Shares and bonds........................ 0

Car(s).................................. 0

Other assets............................ 0[b]

Total Assets............................ 0[/b]

[b]

No Secured nor Hire Purchase Debts[/b]

[b]Unsecured Debts[/b]

Description....................Debt......Monthly...APR

CCJ............................12890.....59.17.....0

Moneybarn......................6360......0.........0

Wescot.........................1714......35........0

ACI ...........................209.......10........0

EPFS...........................821.......10........0

voafone........................2500......154.......0

moorcroft .....................2228......45........0

TSB Overdraft .................1200......17........NaN

fluid..........................2598......28.5......0

lowell.........................1025......50........0

lowell.........................1500......50........0[b]

Total unsecured debts..........33045.....458.67....-  [/b]

[b]

Monthly Budget Summary[/b]

Total monthly income.................... 5,850

Expenses (including HP & secured debts). 3,337.37

Available for debt repayments........... 2,512.63

Monthly UNsecured debt repayments....... 458.67[b]

Amount left after debt repayments....... 2,053.96[/b]

[b]Personal Balance Sheet Summary[/b]

Total assets (things you own)........... 0

Total HP & Secured debt................. -0

Total Unsecured debt.................... -33,045[b]

Net Assets.............................. -33,045[/b]

[i]Created using the SOA calculator at www.stoozing.com. 

Reproduced on Moneysavingexpert with permission, using other browser.[/i][/font]



As you can see we have a decent amount left over on paper monthly but over spend excessively, we currently are borrowing FIL car which is why we just pay for insurance and petrol, council tax is taken by AOE 

2021rdsunshine

Please bear in mind this is not a criticism, just an observation after looking at your SOA. It looks like your SOA is what you feel it should be but by your own admission you over spend excessively. It may help going over your bank statements for the last 6 months to see where all that extra money is going. Going by your SOA you should have a spare £2000 after all expenses paid. If that was real you could basically get rid of your debts in the next 17 months! 

So you really need to change your mindset regarding money and stop the overspending. The fact you now want to change the situation is a great first step towards a debt free life. Sit down with your partner, make a plan and stick to it. 

RAS

I'd second reviewing the last 6 months statements. You both need your credit records (not credit rating), so check all three for free.

Then get statements for everything and allocate each expenditure to a line in the budget. Then check what you spent last Christmas and if you had any holiday, what you spent on that.

If you can't do that, then you both need to keep spending diaries, for a month to start with. 

Do you have a latte habit? Buying in a takeaway and a six pack? Or are clothes going into the supermarket trolley, or Greggs providing lunch and post-school snacks? You can't control your spending until you really know the answers.

The immediate aim is to stabilise the situation, then to look for control. So consider only taking agreed sums of cash that should be adequate and not drawing more without both discussing it.

ManyWays

how old are the children? 

are you not paying this years council tax, or is that included in the AOE? 

do you own a car or is it on finance, because there is nothing in for road tax or maintenance. 

a consumer debt cant be statute barred if you have made a payment to it in the last 6 years (even a token payment). Or if there is a CCJ.