Divorce questions

Josxxx

Hello everyone, I would like to ask for an opinion regarding my wish to divorce my wife.
I will try to make the story short and to the point.
Basically, we have been married for 8 years and my wife this year decided that she wasn't happy anymore because we were arguing a lot, also she says that she needs to become independent. I am 47 and she is 37 and we don't have any children, we were unlucky as we had 2 miscarriages in the past. When she mentioned that she wants to divorce, I was still trying to make things work but realised that if someone doesn't want to stay with you, is better to accept it and move on.
We rent a 1 bed flat and we don't own a house or anything like that. I have been paying for all of the costs since day one, until the last 2 years, where she has contributed. I work a 9 to 5 job, while she doesn't and only works as a small business. My salary is much more than hers. She has now decided not to contribute to anything and has mentioned that she needs at least 6 months to move out.

My questions are: should I just file for divorce, instead of waiting?

Also, if I do file for divorce, will she be able to take half of my savings? I have some personal savings in my bank that were there before we got married and also I have been saving for a rainy day and would hate to lose what I have been working so hard for, since she hasn't really saved anything. I am assuming that if we just divorce by paper that things should be easier, is this correct?
I guess my main issue is that I want to protect my personal savings and get a clean divorce in the process. 

Thank you.

Devongardener

The default for divorce financial settlements is that all savings subject to equal division, whoever holds the accounts.  Pensions can also split between the two parties.   You need legal advice.

PennysIntoPounds

I'm sorry for your troubles, my condolences. I echo that it will be worth paying for a consultation with a divorce solicitor to get advice that is specific to your situation. That should be able to be done by a firm on your local high street. 
In the meantime make sure to keep things civil so proceedings don't drag out and cost more purely through animosity, and to take good care of yourself.
Once you have a professional opinion on what options there are, do post again in case people can chip in with their experiences that may help 

Josxxx

Thank you all for your comments and concern. Actually just overheard soon to be ex wife talking on the phone with another guy. I guess she must've had some one already... amazing. Anyways, I am keeping it calm and cool headed, maybe because I was expecting this. I have done nothing wrong and will keep my dignity.

Just one more question before I seek legal advice from a solicitor.

I was thinking about applying for the divorce on the government website and hoping to just not having to worry about any financial settlement, also since she has stated that she doesn't want anything from me financially, I was thinking about applying for a consent order, where we both agree. Would that be feasible? 

Thank you.

Emmia

Josxxx said:

Thank you all for your comments and concern. Actually just overheard soon to be ex wife talking on the phone with another guy. I guess she must've had some one already... amazing. Anyways, I am keeping it calm and cool headed, maybe because I was expecting this. I have done nothing wrong and will keep my dignity.

Just one more question before I seek legal advice from a solicitor.

I was thinking about applying for the divorce on the government website and hoping to just not having to worry about any financial settlement, also since she has stated that she doesn't want anything from me financially, I was thinking about applying for a consent order, where we both agree. Would that be feasible? 

Thank you.

Although it will cost you, you should ensure you get a financial order as part of this divorce. She can state she wants nothing from you now, but what about the future?

Without a financial order she could make a claim against you years after the divorce, if you say inherited a lot of money, won the lottery, moved into a well paying job etc. (and you could do this to her)... Although you'd be divorced you'd still be financially tied, and I suspect from your post you'll want nothing to do with her after the divorce.

Do you want to potentially lose half your savings now, after a relatively short marriage, or half in 5,10,20 years when you'll have undoubtedly built up a much larger nest egg?

RAS

Better to get out of this sooner rather than later, as it will cost you a lot more if you delay. You need the consent order to protect from future claims.

One of the basics is who is one the tenancy agreement? When does that contract end? Do you have any joint bank or savings accounts? 

Josxxx

RAS said:

Better to get out of this sooner rather than later, as it will cost you a lot more if you delay. You need the consent order to protect from future claims.

One of the basics is who is one the tenancy agreement? When does that contract end? Do you have any joint bank or savings accounts? 

Thank you everyone.

The tenancy agreement is under my name but we have come to an agreement that she can stay until she finds another place to go, as she doesn't have a place to go yet.
As long as we are divorced, I will fine with it.
No, we don't have a joint bank or savings account together.

I will reach out to a solicitor, as it was suggested before and get the clean break financial order. Let's see what happens.

Thank you everyone for your help. Much appreciated.

T.T.D

I think it maybe be good to talk with her about what her expectations are of the divorce Vs your expectations and get on a hymn sheet to sing from.

It will be tough to live with one another but set reasonable ground rules, reasonable do’s and do nots.

If you both want to walk away without interfering with each other’s finances then a clean break order is the best way. 

PennysIntoPounds

Do you want to continue living there? Whether yes or no, while it's noble of you to be fine with her staying now, you may find that it's better for you both to not live together, especially if she's not contributing financially.

You said: 
She has now decided not to contribute to anything and has mentioned that she needs at least 6 months to move out.

That's extremely reasonable for you to agree to, but you may wish to ask your solicitor about how it may affect proceedings should you feel in a few months that this is not how you want to live, especially in a one bed flat, or if she doesn't choose to move out after six months.

I'm sorry it seems that she's involved with someone else, that must have been difficult to hear. Maybe mention that as well to the solicitor in case it affects any worse case scenarios with her not playing ball with an easy divorce or leaving the flat