HMRC debt

RAS

You really do need a Statement of Affairs, so you understand in advance how your money needs to be allocated. 

And it needs to include various pots outside your main account. So a dedicated one into which you pay a portion of every self employment bill received, some into an emergency fund, entertainment for monthly spends and annual holiday. Ask the kids what matters most to them, stuff, days out or holiday? If they want to do something expensive, explain it will take time to save up. And none get to dictate how its spent but everyone gets to choose once in a while.

Once the car's paid for, another untouchable pot for a sum put aside to replace that in say 5 years. 

thelibrarian11

I have one for myself with the family finances in, husband can't even understand it although I have showed him it, I'm totally over feeling sad and angry about his fecklessness and just ready to take control. I have a Monzo account with the pots that I currently put food money in for the month and want to do exactly what you describe eventually, no one else even gets to know it's there. Kids get a small amount of spending money every week and only if they do their homework, husband pays me a set amount and he'll have a bit left to faff around with himself, and then they're not bugging me about it and how much I've got, just use your own £.

thelibrarian11

I've been in debt a very long time, it started with an abusive relationship, and then my Dad dying and my Mum stopping all the help I had when I was young, and then struggling to gain and keep employment on top of it, turns out this was because I'm autistic. I'm finally sorted after longer than I want to admit, last sprint to the end now. We're very happy me being the career woman that can get stuff done and him working around the kids and just along for the ride, I just need to own it a bit more :-) 

Grumpelstiltskin

You need to realize you are in charge of your debt not your creditors, but saying that you need to know what to prioritize and what can be left for a while.

thelibrarian11

OK I will have a look at some other advice on here and get back to you if I get stuck again. Thanks so much.

RAS

Grumpelstiltskin said:

You need to realize you are in charge of your debt not your creditors, but saying that you need to know what to prioritize and what can be left for a while.

That's true for consumer credit. 

Not however for the HMRC debt, or Council Tax. 

sourcrates

HMRC are a powerhouse you don`t want to mess with, they posses powers that far exceed most other enforcement agencies.

You can set up payment arrangements from your online tax account, or phone them, and they will work with you, but do not mess with them as will make someone bankrupt just because they can if they feel you are being dishonest or less than helpful with them.

Tax is a priority debt, forget your other non essential stuff, this is equal priority with rent/mortgage/CT etc.

thelibrarian11

Yep HMRC needs clearing asap, just going to pay whatever I arrange with them and my car. I might start a new thread with my self managed DMP info once I've got a bit further. Thanks :-)