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Social housing priority lists
Comments
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I disagree - still none of your business. You could have not put her on the tenancy. You could have said love it or leave it over the rent, the kitchen and anything else. And they can leave anyway. But whilst nobody shoudl be "hogging" social housing, there is some sense to having a bolt hole in a fairly new realtionship. If they split up, will you be housing her? Will you care what happens to her? No, you won't. What happens to her is not your business, just as other parts of her life are not your business. You rented to your friend - not to her - so it is clear where your loyalties would lie. And there are phrases other than "captive audience" you could use - blackmail comes to mind for example. The kitchen needed doing or not. That should have been your only consideration. You have overstepped the mark for a landlord, you are too involved in this relationship as a friend to one and not their landlord, and you have potentially trapped her by a mechanism of your making and not hers.Grizebeck said:
The kitchen will need doing in due course. If she wasn't prepared to give up the flat then i wasn't prepared to put a new kitchen in. She has agreed to me. So yes it is my business because i wouldn't spend money on something which i dont need to for someone to just go and get a council placeLinLui said:Did the kitchen need doing or not? I honestly don't think her position vis-a-vis the housing list (or anything else) is any of your business. A new kitchen (or a new anything else) should not be a condition of her giving up things to which she is entitled. Her flat, and her position on the housing list, is between her and the council / HA's and nothing to do with you.
Its called a captive audience and a condition of having things done which dont really need doing at the moment.3 -
Oh don't be silly. It's not blackmail and it's not overstepping.LinLui said:
I disagree - still none of your business. You could have not put her on the tenancy. You could have said love it or leave it over the rent, the kitchen and anything else. And they can leave anyway. But whilst nobody shoudl be "hogging" social housing, there is some sense to having a bolt hole in a fairly new realtionship. If they split up, will you be housing her? Will you care what happens to her? No, you won't. What happens to her is not your business, just as other parts of her life are not your business. You rented to your friend - not to her - so it is clear where your loyalties would lie. And there are phrases other than "captive audience" you could use - blackmail comes to mind for example. The kitchen needed doing or not. That should have been your only consideration. You have overstepped the mark for a landlord, you are too involved in this relationship as a friend to one and not their landlord, and you have potentially trapped her by a mechanism of your making and not hers.Grizebeck said:
The kitchen will need doing in due course. If she wasn't prepared to give up the flat then i wasn't prepared to put a new kitchen in. She has agreed to me. So yes it is my business because i wouldn't spend money on something which i dont need to for someone to just go and get a council placeLinLui said:Did the kitchen need doing or not? I honestly don't think her position vis-a-vis the housing list (or anything else) is any of your business. A new kitchen (or a new anything else) should not be a condition of her giving up things to which she is entitled. Her flat, and her position on the housing list, is between her and the council / HA's and nothing to do with you.
Its called a captive audience and a condition of having things done which dont really need doing at the moment.
"I need to do the kitchen at some point in the next few years - if you're staying long term I'll get on with it, if you're not sure how long you'll be my tenant I'll hang on and do it when next vacant"
Essentially exactly the same conversation, but you wouldn't call that blackmail.
"The kitchen needed doing or not". Everyone is extremely quick to jump on the back of landlords if they suggest they will do things only when they need doing. Wanting long term commitment before starting on discretionary spending seems like a perfectly sensible business decision.5 -
No, it won’t remove her from any housing lists. It might affect her points/priority but she can stay on the list. However, now that she’s pregnant (and I’m assuming the other tenant is the father) it seems likely that they’ll both want to stay long-term in the house.0
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Leave the tenant's new gf to make her own choices. The consequences will be hers to deal with and are nothing to do with you. You shouldn't be stepping into the life of the tenants gf. Lets face it, you could decide to sell up in a years time and then she's got no where to live if you insist she comes off the priority housing list. If she is offered a council property, it will be hers as long as she wants it. If she moves into your tenant's property, they can be evicted the next time the tenancy period is up. I am not staying you will, just that you could.
The whole situation looks like a disaster waiting to happen, both for your tenant, his gf, their unborn child., and probably you.
Leave the situation as it is. You have a tenant, no responsibilities towards the tenant gf. The whole 'I'll put a new kitchen in if you come off the council's priority list' is very very odd" and shouldn't be part of the discussion..
I assume you aren't involved in the gf's position as a person on the council's waiting list, so you don't even know for sure if what they are saying is true. Even council's have been known to lie to put more pressure on someone on the waiting list (called Gatekeeping) to remove themselves from the waiting list (telling them they'll never get a property when in reality the council does have a duty to rehouse). You just have no way to know what is true and what is not in your position as the LL.
Deal with facts, don't just stand there goggle eyed listening to what the tenant and his gf is telling you. The tenancy should be a business arrangement, not an opportunity to bring pressure to bear on a LL, the present tenant or his gf (although it sounds like you are both doing this and the situation is getting messier and messier but could easily get worse).1 -
Thanks
Looks like like I'll have to make sure she manually takes herself of the housing list before I put a new kitchen in any time soon!
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No it isn't " exactly the same conversation". You bought a house a few months ago to rent to friend. Your choice. In those few months he's moved in, got a girlfriend and she's now pregnant. Have you any how unstable that all sounds? And you are telling her that she MUST come off the housing list and she MUST give up her flat. You can't guarantee a long term relationship but you think you can guarantee a long term tenancy? You are attempting to force a long term commitment by trapping her in the property. If you don't want to do up the kitchen or it doesn't need doing, then simply say that. That is the "perfectly sensible business decision" - to not interfere with your tenants lives. If you are a good landlord a tenant wants to stay. But I'd be telling her to run like hell from this level of interference in her life from a landlord. Are you as controlling with your friend?BarelySentientAI said:
Oh don't be silly. It's not blackmail and it's not overstepping.LinLui said:
I disagree - still none of your business. You could have not put her on the tenancy. You could have said love it or leave it over the rent, the kitchen and anything else. And they can leave anyway. But whilst nobody shoudl be "hogging" social housing, there is some sense to having a bolt hole in a fairly new realtionship. If they split up, will you be housing her? Will you care what happens to her? No, you won't. What happens to her is not your business, just as other parts of her life are not your business. You rented to your friend - not to her - so it is clear where your loyalties would lie. And there are phrases other than "captive audience" you could use - blackmail comes to mind for example. The kitchen needed doing or not. That should have been your only consideration. You have overstepped the mark for a landlord, you are too involved in this relationship as a friend to one and not their landlord, and you have potentially trapped her by a mechanism of your making and not hers.Grizebeck said:
The kitchen will need doing in due course. If she wasn't prepared to give up the flat then i wasn't prepared to put a new kitchen in. She has agreed to me. So yes it is my business because i wouldn't spend money on something which i dont need to for someone to just go and get a council placeLinLui said:Did the kitchen need doing or not? I honestly don't think her position vis-a-vis the housing list (or anything else) is any of your business. A new kitchen (or a new anything else) should not be a condition of her giving up things to which she is entitled. Her flat, and her position on the housing list, is between her and the council / HA's and nothing to do with you.
Its called a captive audience and a condition of having things done which dont really need doing at the moment.
"I need to do the kitchen at some point in the next few years - if you're staying long term I'll get on with it, if you're not sure how long you'll be my tenant I'll hang on and do it when next vacant"
Essentially exactly the same conversation, but you wouldn't call that blackmail.
"The kitchen needed doing or not". Everyone is extremely quick to jump on the back of landlords if they suggest they will do things only when they need doing. Wanting long term commitment before starting on discretionary spending seems like a perfectly sensible business decision.2 -
Did you look at who you were replying to before you started to rant?LinLui said:
No it isn't " exactly the same conversation". You bought a house a few months ago to rent to friend. Your choice. In those few months he's moved in, got a girlfriend and she's now pregnant. Have you any how unstable that all sounds? And you are telling her that she MUST come off the housing list and she MUST give up her flat. You can't guarantee a long term relationship but you think you can guarantee a long term tenancy? You are attempting to force a long term commitment by trapping her in the property. If you don't want to do up the kitchen or it doesn't need doing, then simply say that. That is the "perfectly sensible business decision" - to not interfere with your tenants lives. If you are a good landlord a tenant wants to stay. But I'd be telling her to run like hell from this level of interference in her life from a landlord. Are you as controlling with your friend?BarelySentientAI said:
Oh don't be silly. It's not blackmail and it's not overstepping.LinLui said:
I disagree - still none of your business. You could have not put her on the tenancy. You could have said love it or leave it over the rent, the kitchen and anything else. And they can leave anyway. But whilst nobody shoudl be "hogging" social housing, there is some sense to having a bolt hole in a fairly new realtionship. If they split up, will you be housing her? Will you care what happens to her? No, you won't. What happens to her is not your business, just as other parts of her life are not your business. You rented to your friend - not to her - so it is clear where your loyalties would lie. And there are phrases other than "captive audience" you could use - blackmail comes to mind for example. The kitchen needed doing or not. That should have been your only consideration. You have overstepped the mark for a landlord, you are too involved in this relationship as a friend to one and not their landlord, and you have potentially trapped her by a mechanism of your making and not hers.Grizebeck said:
The kitchen will need doing in due course. If she wasn't prepared to give up the flat then i wasn't prepared to put a new kitchen in. She has agreed to me. So yes it is my business because i wouldn't spend money on something which i dont need to for someone to just go and get a council placeLinLui said:Did the kitchen need doing or not? I honestly don't think her position vis-a-vis the housing list (or anything else) is any of your business. A new kitchen (or a new anything else) should not be a condition of her giving up things to which she is entitled. Her flat, and her position on the housing list, is between her and the council / HA's and nothing to do with you.
Its called a captive audience and a condition of having things done which dont really need doing at the moment.
"I need to do the kitchen at some point in the next few years - if you're staying long term I'll get on with it, if you're not sure how long you'll be my tenant I'll hang on and do it when next vacant"
Essentially exactly the same conversation, but you wouldn't call that blackmail.
"The kitchen needed doing or not". Everyone is extremely quick to jump on the back of landlords if they suggest they will do things only when they need doing. Wanting long term commitment before starting on discretionary spending seems like a perfectly sensible business decision.
It's not my house. I'm not doing anything.
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Basically I am saying I am happy to do stuff in return for knowing she will be here for a decent time (obviously I know things can change)LinLui said:
No it isn't " exactly the same conversation". You bought a house a few months ago to rent to friend. Your choice. In those few months he's moved in, got a girlfriend and she's now pregnant. Have you any how unstable that all sounds? And you are telling her that she MUST come off the housing list and she MUST give up her flat. You can't guarantee a long term relationship but you think you can guarantee a long term tenancy? You are attempting to force a long term commitment by trapping her in the property. If you don't want to do up the kitchen or it doesn't need doing, then simply say that. That is the "perfectly sensible business decision" - to not interfere with your tenants lives. If you are a good landlord a tenant wants to stay. But I'd be telling her to run like hell from this level of interference in her life from a landlord. Are you as controlling with your friend?BarelySentientAI said:
Oh don't be silly. It's not blackmail and it's not overstepping.LinLui said:
I disagree - still none of your business. You could have not put her on the tenancy. You could have said love it or leave it over the rent, the kitchen and anything else. And they can leave anyway. But whilst nobody shoudl be "hogging" social housing, there is some sense to having a bolt hole in a fairly new realtionship. If they split up, will you be housing her? Will you care what happens to her? No, you won't. What happens to her is not your business, just as other parts of her life are not your business. You rented to your friend - not to her - so it is clear where your loyalties would lie. And there are phrases other than "captive audience" you could use - blackmail comes to mind for example. The kitchen needed doing or not. That should have been your only consideration. You have overstepped the mark for a landlord, you are too involved in this relationship as a friend to one and not their landlord, and you have potentially trapped her by a mechanism of your making and not hers.Grizebeck said:
The kitchen will need doing in due course. If she wasn't prepared to give up the flat then i wasn't prepared to put a new kitchen in. She has agreed to me. So yes it is my business because i wouldn't spend money on something which i dont need to for someone to just go and get a council placeLinLui said:Did the kitchen need doing or not? I honestly don't think her position vis-a-vis the housing list (or anything else) is any of your business. A new kitchen (or a new anything else) should not be a condition of her giving up things to which she is entitled. Her flat, and her position on the housing list, is between her and the council / HA's and nothing to do with you.
Its called a captive audience and a condition of having things done which dont really need doing at the moment.
"I need to do the kitchen at some point in the next few years - if you're staying long term I'll get on with it, if you're not sure how long you'll be my tenant I'll hang on and do it when next vacant"
Essentially exactly the same conversation, but you wouldn't call that blackmail.
"The kitchen needed doing or not". Everyone is extremely quick to jump on the back of landlords if they suggest they will do things only when they need doing. Wanting long term commitment before starting on discretionary spending seems like a perfectly sensible business decision.
If she had said no I won't come off the list then I would have not agreed to replace kitchen
It seems a logical thing to do from my point of view
This isn't a debate about my business choices it was about the removal from a housing list.0 -
You seem to be ignoring a lot of comments about this is not appropriate for you to interfere with.0
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TBH i am not bothered if people dont think its appropriate for me to make the choices ive made with this property and the two tenantsdeannagone said:You seem to be ignoring a lot of comments about this is not appropriate for you to interfere with.
We have come to an agreement about the way forward re the house so peoples views on this are not really relevant
She has agreed to write to the relevant department to have herself removed from the housing list so that issue is now resolved
0
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