Stopping the backsliding… a family of four no longer living beyond their means

Bluegreen143

What a hectic and exhausting week full of (alas unpaid) overtime working and a night away with work. I’m shattered! I did take back a couple of hours this morning so I could go back for a kip after dropping the kids off.

Then school fayre this evening, which was fun and we saw quite a few friends.

Spend updates:

Amazon spend was for chicken feed. However the price has crept up a lot lately which is why I didn’t recognise it straight away so Red is going to look elsewhere next time. We won’t need any for a good few weeks now anyway.

£87.51 - Tesco - this is a liitle bit high. I was away and Red added a few things to the basket that he felt we were low on but didn’t want to remove anything I’d put in. We’ve agreed to be a bit tighter on grocery spends in future (for the avoidance of doubt, this is only half a week’s shopping, not a full shop…).

£20 - cash taken out to spend at school fayre - bought preloved school jumpers, raffle tickets, preloved toddler books for my nephew etc. Doesn’t include what the kids spent as they each took some pocket money.

Red was also paid today and put £2,223 into the joint account which I budgeted off into all the various pots. His salary mainly goes on bills tbh as many of them come out on the 1st, then refilling the grocery pot for two weeks, but I spread some around the upcoming priorities pots.

Bluegreen143

Life feels like it’s on fast-forward right now. Not my favourite feeling. Work is incredibly busy, weekends are packed with social commitments, and I feel like I’ve barely stopped for breath in weeks.

It definitely impacts the budget. This weekend I bought a couple of meal deals because I either ran out of time to make sandwiches or was too exhausted to get up early enough. I also picked up a few treats for myself (nail polish, mostly) and paid for some food out of my personal spending money. This doesn’t affect the joint budget I track here, but it’s a pattern worth noticing.

Saturday

• Dropped Monkey at a Cubs trip and Red at his stag do.
• Took Bambi to Tesco for meal deals, sunscreen and nail polish.
• Spent most of the day at the park with Bambi’s best friend and her mum.
• Picked Monkey up, then hid in my room for 30 minutes to paint my nails and listen to an audiobook.
• Read to the kids, had dinner with the kids and a friend, and had a glass of wine with my friend while the kids watched a movie.
• Didn’t get to sleep until after 1:30am because I couldn’t get to sleep waiting for Red to get home and then was hearing all the gossip from the stag do! 😳

Today

• Took Monkey to a sports tournament he was playing in another town an hour away.
• Met my sister, baby nephew, dad and papa for lunch in that town, plus some family drama courtesy of my dad. 🤦‍♀️
• Walked and visited the park together, then headed back to the sports field with Bambi to wait (for ages) until the tournament finished.
• Stopped at Lidl for dishwasher tablets and dessert because frankly, I needed a treat.

And now... breathe out.

Red has done the washing and changed the bedsheets while I was out 🙌🏼. Monkey’s team came second in their league. Bambi had a wonderful play date yesterday. Bambi and I now have matching nail polish on, which is super cute.

Life is good. Far too busy, but I have to remember the good too.

I’m planning to catch up with YNAB tonight, so I’ll be back to keep myself honest!

Bluegreen143

Ok, spending update:

£2.50 - Monkey pocket money (base pocket money for the week & he can earn extra with chores, a new system we are trying)

£76.91 - petrol

£2.50 - small kids’ sunscreen

£123.68 - annual home insurance

£12.60 - groceries (dishwasher tabs & dessert)

Bluegreen143

Morning all.

Plan for today:

• Quick reset of kitchen
• Work until 1pm - have SO MUCH to do. May have to ask for help from my manager with a couple of tasks actually as it’s quite an unrealistic amount with the deadlines I have!
• Go to airport, fly down south, get train to hotel town, get taxi to hotel (urgh. Will be travelling for about 6-7 hours total).

Money saving opportunities fairly limited as I’m travelling, but I plan to eat lunch before going and take lots of snacks for travelling and not need to buy food until I have dinner at the hotel, which I will expense.

I used to have an awful habit of always buying myself a new book at the airport but you’ll all be pleased to know I knocked that on the head ages ago and have a library book to take with me on this trip.

Bambi said to me this morning “can I get a new school bag for primary three” and I’d said “sure” automatically before thinking then started to backtrack as I remembered her bag is only one year old and in good nick. She explained she’s just over the sparkly pink thing now 🤣. Having pondered since I dropped her off, I’ve decided I’ll tell her we won’t buy her a new bag ourselves til it’s worn out, but she can spend her own pocket money on one if she likes. Monkey stoically said he’s happy to use his current bag for a third year (despite also having outgrown the design) so he’s at least being a good role model!

Baileys_Babe

@Bluegreen143 said:

Will be travelling for about 6-7 hours total

This is about a working day, will you get time off in lieu?

I think that is a good compromise with Bambi, it will be interesting to hear what they decide. Well done Monkey for being a good role model, is there any way their bag can be adapted so it no longer has an out grown theme, I thinking badges, patches etc. in the future would it be worth buying more neutral bags and then adding themed embellishments if needed?

Bluegreen143

I don’t think either bag can be adapted. Monkey’s is fine, it’s a Harry Potter bag, it’s not embarrassingly outgrown, he’s just moved on slightly but he does generally like HP still. Bambi’s entire bag is pink and sparkly, it’s not themed, she’s just decided she likes blue now 🤣. She did choose the bag herself last year and had been obsessed with pink since she was 3 so I thought it was safe!

Ha to getting time back in lieu, I wish 🤣. I’ve got an assembly for Bambi on Thursday so will take a couple of hours guilt-free for that, but otherwise no. I think the general idea is that it’s expected you do extra work when needed at this level. I’d also need to take about a week off to get all the extra time back that I’ve worked in the last two weeks which isn’t practical anyway.

Baileys_Babe

Harry Potter is popular with all ages, including a friend of mine who is in the eighties 😆

I've avoided anything pink for decades, I will now tolerate occasionally now.

Your work sounds like OHs regarding time off in lieu, he now takes time off guilt free when it works for us, including regular trips to support his parents.

Will you be able to use your time travelling positively? Relaxing, family admin, reading & posting on MSE 😆

Bluegreen143

I do have some work to do while travelling but you bet I’ll use much of the time to read my book, tweak YNAB etc 🤣. Could do the next Tesco order too.

beanielou

Hope event goes well.

Spendless

I have a differing viewpoint re Bambi's schoolbag. I would replace it. She's telling you that's she's now grown up/away from the pink sparkle she's liked since she was 3. I also wouldn't make her pay for it. My Mum used to do that with me with pens. My birthday is close to the beginning of the academic year. Moving schools at nearly 12, I discovered my new class wrote with fountain pens. I didnt own one. I told my parents, I then got one as my birthday present! To this day, I dont know why I had to receive a school supply as a gift and what they'd have done if my birthday had been months away. The memory remains with me and I'm in my 50s!

I appreciate youre seeing it as wasteful and not good for the environment as the current bag hasnt worn out. I would re-purpose it to use to hold something else instead or sell/donate it.