Executor nightmare

cuppatea25

Families! I have cared for my ex mother in law since my marriage broke down 15 years ago.  She had 2 sons.  For the last 5 years her health had not been so good, I did everything for her and we were more like mum and daughter.  As a result, she named me as next of kin and executor and her estate is to be equally split between the 3 of us. My ex husband hadn't spoken to my mil for 6 years and my ex bil is a big child who has been in and out of his parents' lives, stealing and lying at every point.  He is of no fixed abode and is unemployed and was relying on my mil to give him money every week.  When it became obvious that my mil's health was very bad, the bil bullied her into adding him as a joint executor arguing that I wasn't a family and couldn't be trusted.  

So, I was with my mil when she passed, during which time, the bil used my mil bank card to withdraw cash from her bank account, moved in her home and stripped it of anything of any value and sold it all.  He is essentially squatting and destroying her home.  Thanks to him, she had very little money and the only inheritance is in the house.  I managed to get probate in just my name and he has his rights reserved.  He has written fake receipts for rubbish removal and demanded money from what little I hold from her bank account, he's sold all the household furniture and is living in the property without paying any bills.  

Last night he got very drunk and started demanded money out of account to be able to rent a property.  I told him that he had taken enough and we would talk when he was sober but this escalated and for my safety, I gave him the money.  

Thank you if you've got this far!  I know I can move to remove his as executor due to his untrustworthy actions, but I've heard this is costly and will take time.  Any suggestions would be appreciated.  My feeling is that because he's named as joint executor, he can pretty much get away with it all?  

Marcon

cuppatea25 said:

Families! I have cared for my ex mother in law since my marriage broke down 15 years ago.  She had 2 sons.  For the last 5 years her health had not been so good, I did everything for her and we were more like mum and daughter.  As a result, she named me as next of kin and executor and her estate is to be equally split between the 3 of us. My ex husband hadn't spoken to my mil for 6 years and my ex bil is a big child who has been in and out of his parents' lives, stealing and lying at every point.  He is of no fixed abode and is unemployed and was relying on my mil to give him money every week.  When it became obvious that my mil's health was very bad, the bil bullied her into adding him as a joint executor arguing that I wasn't a family and couldn't be trusted.  

So, I was with my mil when she passed, during which time, the bil used my mil bank card to withdraw cash from her bank account, moved in her home and stripped it of anything of any value and sold it all.  He is essentially squatting and destroying her home.  Thanks to him, she had very little money and the only inheritance is in the house.  I managed to get probate in just my name and he has his rights reserved.  He has written fake receipts for rubbish removal and demanded money from what little I hold from her bank account, he's sold all the household furniture and is living in the property without paying any bills.  

Last night he got very drunk and started demanded money out of account to be able to rent a property.  I told him that he had taken enough and we would talk when he was sober but this escalated and for my safety, I gave him the money.  

Thank you if you've got this far!  I know I can move to remove his as executor due to his untrustworthy actions, but I've heard this is costly and will take time.  Any suggestions would be appreciated.  My feeling is that because he's named as joint executor, he can pretty much get away with it all?  

The other party who's missing out financially if your ex-BIL is behaving as you say is your ex-husband. Why not explain the position to him and see if he can get his brother under control?

cuppatea25

Unfortunately the brothers hate each other and don't talk.  My ex has tried talking to him but there's no getting through to him.  

flossymcfly

If there were threats made to your safety did you not contact the police?

cuppatea25

flossymcfly said:

If there were threats made to your safety did you not contact the police?

The threats were more about pay him the money or he'll squat in the house until it's sold.  There was name calling and a suggestion of harm but mostly I just gave the money as it's impacting my home life and mental health. 

Marcon

cuppatea25 said:

Unfortunately the brothers hate each other and don't talk.  My ex has tried talking to him but there's no getting through to him.  

In that case I'm afraid your only recourse is likely to be the legal route.

Voyager2002

cuppatea25 said:

Unfortunately the brothers hate each other and don't talk.  My ex has tried talking to him but there's no getting through to him.  

In which case your ex will not hesitate to upset him: after all, it is his (ex's) inheritance that is being destroyed by this drunken waste of space. 

bluelad1927

Ate you in a position to walk away from your executor duty?

Alderbank

bluelad1927 said:

Ate you in a position to walk away from your executor duty?

Unfortunately no.

The OP has now 'intermeddled', to use the legal phrase, so they need to see the administration through.

Renunciation at this point would be taken advantage of by the brother.

Malthusian

cuppatea25 said:

The threats were more about pay him the money or he'll squat in the house until it's sold.  There was name calling and a suggestion of harm but mostly I just gave the money as it's impacting my home life and mental health. 

Treat it as an advance of his inheritance and deduct it from his share when you eventually evict him. I bet a fiver he goes nowhere and simply spends the money. 

You need to see a solicitor to begin the process of evicting him. Potentially to remove him as executor alongside that if he unreserves his powers (although he would need the wherewithal to apply to the Probate Office). The solicitor's costs will come out of the estate. Any damage and other costs directly attributable to the BIL will come out of his share.

There is another beneficiary waiting for his money so I don't think walking away would be a good idea legally or practically (even if you could get along without your share of however much is left).

cuppatea25

Thank you for all your comments.  My ex had a conversation with his brother and told him to get out and leave me alone.  We'll see what happens.  

When I was at the house yesterday I removed the last of the furniture so I'm hoping that'll stop the bil staying?!

I'm worried about the legal route of removing the bil because there is not a lot of money in the estate.  I think each beneficiary should walk away with about £30,000 and I'm guessing the legal route would take a massive chunk of that? I'm very grateful to my mil for leaving me in her will but honestly, I would happily walk away with nothing. My biggest concern is that there is a £90,000 loan owed on the house (they released equity) and I have no doubt if my bil has access to the house money, he'll take it all and I will be left with responsibility for that debt?