I've really got to sort it out

stopspendingstopspending

Oooooomph. Where do I start?

I just struggle with impulsive spending and keep spending without sticking to the budget and get debt accumulated on my credit cards. It is nothing out there either, just toys for my son, but mostly expensive food and snacks and takeaways. A little bit of clothes shopping here and there (but mostly for my son again!). I really struggle to keep it under control, especially when my mental health suffers, money worries go to the very bottom list of my problems. And that's what's making it so hard. I just never worry about money. But should.

Even as I am typying this, I have no idea what debt I have got so will add it as I go (imagine I will get a shock):

Credit Card 1 -£102.82
Credit Card 2 -£140.59 
Credit Card 3 -£2,495

I've also only got £54 to last me to the end of the month, which means I will add another £150 of the debt at least in grocery shopping.

I buy too many expensive lunches and treats and foods. It's so depressing otherwise though. I also really need to take out a £2,500 loan to cover medical expenses and not sure how I will manage it all as I can't afford to add £225 repayments for 10 months just yet. Something obviously has to give. I sold everything that was sellable via Facebook marketplace and ebay already. I do surveys online but they are soooooooo time consuming. I cannot pick up another permanent job but could do something from home for a few hours but I dont think there are opportunities that are easily available for that?

What else can I do?

My plan so far:

- no spending on myself, sticking to home hair dyes
- toys and clothes for son - up to £100 per month only, for the first 3 of months I should keep it to £50
- Review subscriptions - cancel 1 or 2 
- Look into meal prep boxes like Gousto - might it save some money as i dont go to supermarket to often then
- cheap lunches at work
- find alternative to buying breakfast
- keep this diary to get accountable
- clear small debts first
- look for good tips on other threads on this forum

My grocery/ household items budget is £600 per month and it is very tight for me but it is the only area where I realistically can make savings. I think I need to find another £150 per month.

Gosh, a lot of ramblings here. 

Brie

Well done for writing it all down.  It's a bit daunting when you first things in black and white but it's also a great way to start making a plan.

May I make some suggestions?

You don't say how old your son is but I'm assuming quite young.  Can you take your impulse shopping to the charity shops instead?  Things are much cheaper.  Not everything has to be brand new or the very latest fashion shade - kids mostly don't notice.

I've looked into meal prep things and frankly I can't see that they are actually a saving.  Many of them still require you to have a reasonably stocked kitchen or to go out and get the main (meat?) ingredient.  Would an online shop work better where you could add to your shopping list and get a delivery every 2 weeks or something?  A big shop justifies paying the delivery charge and keeps you from too much temptation.  

Breakfasts and lunches!  Well buying a breakfast on the way to work was a big temptation for me - stop at Coop and get a croissant or go to the work restaurant and get a bacon sandwich!!  Nom!!! 

So for breakfasts - if I really didn't have a chance to make something in the morning, not even toast, I had a ready supply of muesli bars.  That and my travel mug of coffee and I was set.  When I was organised I might make overnight oats ready to pop in my bag and eat at my desk.  Or even a peanut butter and banana sandwich.  

Lunches - I'm reasonably fond of leftovers and eventually trained him what cooks and clears up to set aside those few spoonfuls of stew into a pot, next night the left over rice.  Bingo!  Lunch is ready to go.  A bit of lettuce and add some tuna and a couple of little tomatoes costs pennies.  I "acquired" one of those tiddly jam pots that are used in nice hotels and that's a perfect size container for dressing - saves the lettuce from going limp overnight.  If you must you can buy these in some supermarkets - last time I looked one was 60p which is a huge amount for a spoonful of jam but is much less than buying some plastic storage pot made for dressing and it's probably much more leakproof.  

But remember occasional treats are  fine.  If you're meeting friends it's no sin to get a caramel latte if that's your coffee of choice.  But it should be "occasional", not 3 times a day like some of my colleagues seem to do.  

Why not fill out the statement of accounts (SOA) on the top sticky so you can really see what your budget looks like.  Post it back for comments and suggestions or just keep it in your back pocket to remind yourself about what you are trying to achieve.  I had my spreadsheet of credit card debts in my back pocket for about 5 years before I knew I had things solidly heading in the right direction - just as well - I left it in there a number of times when washing my jeans and it would make such a mess of the laundry!!

Good luck and fight the good fight!!!

itsthelittlethings

Start writing down everything you spend. I started doing it on a spreadsheet but now I have gone over to using a Google spreadsheet, the budget template. I can fill out what I’m spending on my phone as I go along and then adjust the budget in my computer. Writing it down is a good way to de-emotionalise the spending and be able to reflect on it. I have been doing it for about three months now and find it really helpful.

Something I find really helpful is to try to educate myself about money management. I follow a lady on Instagram and Facebook who does money education. I bought a course, yes it was £60 but I am learning so much. I never realised how much of a messed up relationship with money and finances I have and I’m finally trying to repair it.

stopspendingstopspending

Brie said:

Well done for writing it all down.  It's a bit daunting when you first things in black and white but it's also a great way to start making a plan.

May I make some suggestions?

You don't say how old your son is but I'm assuming quite young.  Can you take your impulse shopping to the charity shops instead?  Things are much cheaper.  Not everything has to be brand new or the very latest fashion shade - kids mostly don't notice.

I've looked into meal prep things and frankly I can't see that they are actually a saving.  Many of them still require you to have a reasonably stocked kitchen or to go out and get the main (meat?) ingredient.  Would an online shop work better where you could add to your shopping list and get a delivery every 2 weeks or something?  A big shop justifies paying the delivery charge and keeps you from too much temptation.  

Breakfasts and lunches!  Well buying a breakfast on the way to work was a big temptation for me - stop at Coop and get a croissant or go to the work restaurant and get a bacon sandwich!!  Nom!!! 

So for breakfasts - if I really didn't have a chance to make something in the morning, not even toast, I had a ready supply of muesli bars.  That and my travel mug of coffee and I was set.  When I was organised I might make overnight oats ready to pop in my bag and eat at my desk.  Or even a peanut butter and banana sandwich.  

Lunches - I'm reasonably fond of leftovers and eventually trained him what cooks and clears up to set aside those few spoonfuls of stew into a pot, next night the left over rice.  Bingo!  Lunch is ready to go.  A bit of lettuce and add some tuna and a couple of little tomatoes costs pennies.  I "acquired" one of those tiddly jam pots that are used in nice hotels and that's a perfect size container for dressing - saves the lettuce from going limp overnight.  If you must you can buy these in some supermarkets - last time I looked one was 60p which is a huge amount for a spoonful of jam but is much less than buying some plastic storage pot made for dressing and it's probably much more leakproof.  

But remember occasional treats are  fine.  If you're meeting friends it's no sin to get a caramel latte if that's your coffee of choice.  But it should be "occasional", not 3 times a day like some of my colleagues seem to do.  

Why not fill out the statement of accounts (SOA) on the top sticky so you can really see what your budget looks like.  Post it back for comments and suggestions or just keep it in your back pocket to remind yourself about what you are trying to achieve.  I had my spreadsheet of credit card debts in my back pocket for about 5 years before I knew I had things solidly heading in the right direction - just as well - I left it in there a number of times when washing my jeans and it would make such a mess of the laundry!!

Good luck and fight the good fight!!!

Oh thank you so much for your response and encouragement! I really appreciate it.

Yes my son is only 1 year old and I definitely overindulge there but it is the food where I keep spending the most it seems, so thank you for meal suggestions too. I really need to push myself more there.

I will look into the SOA, I missed it completely! Sounds like a useful thing to do.

stopspendingstopspending

itsthelittlethings said:

Start writing down everything you spend. I started doing it on a spreadsheet but now I have gone over to using a Google spreadsheet, the budget template. I can fill out what I’m spending on my phone as I go along and then adjust the budget in my computer. Writing it down is a good way to de-emotionalise the spending and be able to reflect on it. I have been doing it for about three months now and find it really helpful.

Something I find really helpful is to try to educate myself about money management. I follow a lady on Instagram and Facebook who does money education. I bought a course, yes it was £60 but I am learning so much. I never realised how much of a messed up relationship with money and finances I have and I’m finally trying to repair it.

Thank you, yes I guess it also help to make feel spending more tangible as it is otherwise so easy to just swipe the card and forget about balance!

Just went to do a mid-week shop and spent £130. Still dont understand how, as my aim was £90. I did buy a £8 toy for my son that I should not have but the rest is just mind boggling.

stopspendingstopspending

Okay, so I did my SOA - this is only concerning my bit of budget that I manage so you will see some areas of expenditure missing. I do not have an emergency fund and no holiday fund.

The nursery fee will go down by £250 from September, but I also want to take a 0% loan now for £225 per month for an important procedure.

I know this is probably not sustainable?

[font=courier new][b]Statement of Affairs and Personal Balance Sheet[/b][b]

Household Information[/b]

Number of adults in household........... 2

Number of children in household......... 1

Number of cars owned.................... 1[b]

Monthly Income Details[/b]

Monthly income after tax................ 3000

Partners monthly income after tax....... 0

Benefits................................ 0

Other income............................ 0[b]

Total monthly income.................... 3000[/b][b]

Monthly Expense Details[/b]

Mortgage................................ 0

Secured/HP loan repayments.............. 0

Rent.................................... 0

Management charge (leasehold property).. 0

Council tax............................. 0

Electricity............................. 461

Gas..................................... 0

Oil..................................... 0

Water rates............................. 146

Telephone (land line)................... 0

Mobile phone............................ 55

TV Licence.............................. 0

Satellite/Cable TV...................... 0

Internet Services....................... 25

Groceries etc. ......................... 700

Clothing................................ 0

Petrol/diesel........................... 85

Road tax................................ 15

Car Insurance........................... 0

Car maintenance (including MOT)......... 47

Car parking............................. 0

Other travel............................ 0

Childcare/nursery....................... 1000

Other child related expenses............ 50

Medical (prescriptions, dentist etc).... 49

Pet insurance/vet bills................. 120

Buildings insurance..................... 0

Contents insurance...................... 0

Life assurance ......................... 0

Other insurance......................... 0

Presents (birthday, christmas etc)...... 50

Haircuts................................ 0

Entertainment........................... 60

Holiday................................. 0

Emergency fund.......................... 0

Household maintanence................... 75

Charity................................. 3[b]

Total monthly expenses.................. 2941[/b]

[b]

Assets[/b]

Cash.................................... 0

House value (Gross)..................... 0

Shares and bonds........................ 0

Car(s).................................. 0

Other assets............................ 0[b]

Total Assets............................ 0[/b]

[b]

No Secured nor Hire Purchase Debts[/b]

[b]Unsecured Debts[/b]

Description....................Debt......Monthly...APR

Credit Card 1..................102.82....6.........23.9

Credit Card 2..................140.59....25........29.8

Credit Card 3..................2564.91...50........29.8[b]

Total unsecured debts..........2808.32...81........-  [/b]

[b]

Monthly Budget Summary[/b]

Total monthly income.................... 3,000

Expenses (including HP & secured debts). 2,941

Available for debt repayments........... 59

Monthly UNsecured debt repayments....... 81[b]

Amount short for making debt repayments. -22[/b]

[b]Personal Balance Sheet Summary[/b]

Total assets (things you own)........... 0

Total HP & Secured debt................. -0

Total Unsecured debt.................... -2,808.32[b]

Net Assets.............................. -2,808.32[/b]

[i]Created using the SOA calculator at www.LemonFool.co.uk.

Reproduced on Moneysavingexpert with permission, using other browser.[/i][/font]

MFWannabe

Just a quick one that massively stands out: £461 electric 😱 
Is that correct? Is that direct debit or actual usage? 

Philliggi

A good alternative to surveys is paid play sites, if you play mobile games a lot. I have a lot of spare time at work as a driver, and i did the surveys but found sites like testerup just as rewarding financially and far less mind numbing. Testerup has a minimum payout of £70 but it should only take around 2 months to get to that. 

Theres also other apps like paid step counters etc. They make peanuts over a long time but its literally money for nothing. 

As for other ideas:

Switch supermarket - aldi instead of asda etc

Downsize brands - aldi own instead of kelloggs, there really isnt a difference in much of the stuff. 

Clothes bundles for son on market place- you can fill a wardrobe in any given age/size for about £40, and then re sell them once they grow out. 

0% credit card if available rather than a loan. Caution with this one. You need to be disciplined and over pay. 

Tilly tidy- skim the pennys off your bank account daily so all accounts are rounded to £'s. The excess goes to pay off debt. Alternatively round you bank accounts to £10 increments weekly. 

There are plenty of other ideas. Have a look at the boost your income forum, and the thrifty frugal forum (i know thats the wrong name but i cant remember it)

Good luck. It doesnt seem like your dent is massive so its good your being pro active to keep it low. 

stopspendingstopspending

MFWannabe said:

Just a quick one that massively stands out: £461 electric 😱 
Is that correct? Is that direct debit or actual usage? 

This is direct debit which includes the debt that accumulated due to incorrect meter readings ( I have been trying to get a smart meter installed for over a year but they dont have capacity!). We do have a large house and we also have heatpump which heats our water and the house itself.

stopspendingstopspending

Okay I just had an offer from one of my credit card Banks (where I have £102 credit) to make a balance transfer for 15 months free of charge - this is good right? So I can move my biggest lump there?

joedenise

It's a good offer.  It depends on what credit limit you're offered as you'll only be able to move that but if it's bigger than your biggest debt then definitely worth doing but make sure you pay it off within the 0% period.  If the limit is bigger than your biggest debt then you could also transfer one of the smaller debts.