One final push BPD vs DFW

Lonelygambler

Boss1815 said:

Honestly I’ve had a shoddy day today with my son, and I’m skint at the moment and that’s making me feel depressed because I can’t just go and splurge to make myself feel better, only sort of credit I have is Clearpay and I’m so tempted (especially after a couple glasses of wine 🍷) to just go online and spend! Send help! 🤣🤣🙈

Great weather here in the east of the country as well.

Have a good weekend xx

Hey. I hope today is better for you and your son. 

I’ve found reading a good way to overcome those triggers / feeling sad. 

LG

dragoneye454

Boss1815 said:

Honestly I’ve had a shoddy day today with my son, and I’m skint at the moment and that’s making me feel depressed because I can’t just go and splurge to make myself feel better, only sort of credit I have is Clearpay and I’m so tempted (especially after a couple glasses of wine 🍷) to just go online and spend! Send help! 🤣🤣🙈

Great weather here in the east of the country as well.

Have a good weekend xx

Bit late but..... Don't do it!! (Running in slo mo to stop the spending)

Sorry you had a shoddy day. Really hoping today is better for you. 

dragoneye454

Morning all,

It's been quiet for a while (joys of monthly pay) as there hasn't really been any change.

Absolutely loving the sun at the moment and all the bees are out on the apple trees.
Most of the focus has been on the garden and getting rid of the absolute forest of ivy that has killed all the trees underneath it.
Will be spending money this weekend on replacing the plants but am using my bonus for that so it's not hurting any other pots.

Starting to feel a bit burnt out with everything that has been going on. Don't know if the weekend will help or whether I need an actual week off. Time will tell.

Lonelygambler

Burn out is really serious. I’ve gone through it during work last year and it completely killed me alongside my gambling addiction. 

I hope you can rest and enjoy the sunshine 

dragoneye454

Good Morning all,

It's been a while.
A few things have happened in the meantime as life does.

Dad asked me to go on a cruise with him to complete a bucket list wish of seeing the northern lights. That was a cost of £1,900 for 10 nights which isn't too awful. Nowhere near as bad as our past disney holidays.
We came back from that on 30th October and it was cathartic as we talked through alot of things.

We also lost one of our doggos at the end of August which was devastating and tramatic as the vet he was registered with just wouldn't get him in for an emergency appointment and by the time we got one with another vet and got there, he died as the car was in the vets car park.

Work is still rumbling on in the background and I don't know when things will calm down there.

The positive I am taking from all of this is I haven't had a single uncontrollable spiral in that time where before anything would trigger me so pretty proud of that.

So where are we at financially?
Start: £23,222.70
Current: £8,775.92

So that's £14,446.78 in 7 months. Pretty good but the payments have definitely slowed down in the past few months.
I struggled with the balance of paying everything off and wanting money for self-care/getting out the house.

Whilst on the cruise a discussion occurred where my dad has offered to pay the rest of the debt off with part of a retirement fund he is cashing in. The reasoning is that we had already told him months ago that once he retires he will no longer be contributing towards rent (he lives with me and my husband) as we all know how poor state pension is and he wants to return the gesture by helping us now.

This is exciting but I am also feeling strange that we won't complete the debt journey off our own steam. Does that make sense? We've come so far on our own that its weird for someone else to end it for us. Not that I am going to look a gift horse in the mouth and we did 'discuss' for quite a while as to whether this is something he actually wants to do.

So this is where we are. I will let you know once I have anymore updates.

vampirotoothus

Wow! You have done incredibly well.
How kind of your dad. How about taking the money and then saving it up in another account (maybe premium bonds) to give back to him, should he need it? That way you have still paid it yourselves?
Good luck with your decision V x