Ex demanding money from lodgers

Schwarzwald

subjecttocontract said:

I think the problem is that people struggle to say no.
If you want to pay do it. If you don't, say no. If he continues to harass you call the police.

another problem is that people struggle to understand what the police is for, definitely not to get in between two ex partners haggling over money ....

ian1246

One issue you might want to consider is whether this agreement is written down anywhere or referenced in your own communications (crucially, by him).

Because ultimately if its not there would be nothing stopping him taking this to court & arguing the agreement was completely different to what your saying. In such a scenario a court would assess the respective claims strengths & rule accordingly I.e. of he claims the loan was made under the understanding there would be X% interest made there's a not minor risk they may agree with him...

So ultimately what I m saying is the toughness of your stance should be linked to the evidence you have to show the agreement & the relevant conditions of it. If you have none, your definitely going to need to consider how reasonable the respective positions will seem to a court and may need to compromise/adopt a more conciliatory tone & reach an agreement (on everything) & write it down this time.

Though I would suggest you also go through your mortgage paperwork. It would be a strange lender who will have loaned to you knowing about another lender (your-ex)... more likely that 10% deposit will have got declared as a gift, with his signing to confirm that as well....

swingaloo

What will happen if the second child, who is now an adult decides never to leave home and you meet a new partner but dont live together. Will your ex just have to accept he will never see his money? Seems very unfair.

Kim_13

swingaloo said:

What will happen if the second child, who is now an adult decides never to leave home and you meet a new partner but dont live together. Will your ex just have to accept he will never see his money? Seems very unfair.

And the partner in that scenario might be more likely not to move in, knowing that he would be required to pay £28K to someone who is nothing to do with him (because it doesn’t seem that the OP has that money in a lump sum.) Partner could move in and not pay, but that would be likely to make the situation worse than it is currently as that would be a breach of the terms rather than just something that neither side envisaged when the agreement was made.

martindow

Another angle on this is that paying something monthly (the OP suggested £100) to gradually reduce the money owing could be advantageous in the future.  It may be tricky suddenly laying your hands on £28k if the OP got a new partner or circumstances changed to require selling the house that would trigger the repayment.  A reduced balance would be easier to settle in those circumstances.