£100 present but he owes me money

Sallys_Savings

I feel really mean this year
Eventhough my son got some odds and ends as pressies he also had £100...BUT he owed me £85 and I took it out direct (giving him £15).

It just seemed silly giving him £100 and then asking for the money (he has been a pain in paying back money he owed to me in the past, taking months). I also hadnt got the "actual" money to give him as I had lent it to him lol

Hes feeling sorry for himself saying that it seems as if hes had nothing for christmas (his brother has gone out today to spend his money in the sales)...I'm feeling really mean about this but also feel that he is old enough to realise (hes 20) and should learn a lesson by this....but I'm feeling horrible too

whitewing

Sally, I think you did the right thing. Don't give in. (((Hugs)))

LuciferTDark

It's the only way he'll ever learn the value of money, good on you for doing it.

busydaffodil1

its a good lesson he has learnt. He'll think twice before borrowing next time. I reckon your actions might be a turning point and this might point him in the right direction.
Dont stress over it. He knows what to say to make you feel guilty. Dont fall for it. Rest assured, this will make him think about debt.

nearlyrich

I agree you have done the right thing, I would do the same, don't feel guilty.

shop-to-drop

Yep, you definitely did the right thing. He'll get over it and learn along the way. He's obviously doing a good job on the guilt trip!

Dumbledore55

My daughter and son-in-law owe me a bit more than that and don't seem to be making any effort to pay me back. Got a bit hacked off when they bought a new settee and had a holiday. So, for her birthday earlier this month and for Christmas for both of them I made them money off vouchers - off the amount they owed me.

It reminded them that they still owe me money and teaches them that debt does have to be paid back. I also gave them a 'hamper' of goodies that I've collected over the years - BOGOFs and freebies through sites on here - I've done this for a few years now and they love opening all the little individual parcels and trying to guess what they are..

tifnstav

you've done totally the right thing, my mum still does it to me! and i'm 27.

if my mum has bought something at the shop for me and I owe her money, if I get a tenner for christmas from, for instance an uncle, she'll deduct the cost of the item before passing me the change. sure, you feel a bit gutted when you end up with £2.45, but thats life!

mary43

You did the right thing..................he'll get over it and it should teach him a valuable lesson in life.

jamtart6

You definitely did the right thing . I have a friend whos mum constantly doles out money and he has no concept of budgeting or anything. Fair enough to borrow some and pay it back over weeks/when he gets paid, but he doesn't. Its the harsh route but think you'll do him a favour in the long run

edit: merry christmas sally savings!! cant wait for the 2008 challenge!!

Rharni

It's not as if he hasn't had a Christmas Present....more he has got away with having to pay you back the money he owes you.

He should be grateful to you....he's a lucky young man, I hope some day he sees that...