Buying a little piece of Middle England; Manifesting my way to mortgage free.

ladybird1106

I call those sorts of people emotional vampires, suck you dry and spit you out. Shaming eating garlic doesn't keep them at bay. Hopefully now you are aware what they are doing, you deal with them better. 
Love 🐞

debtfreewannabe321

@redofromstart @ladybird1106 That's exactly what this colleague is, I am not sure how I didn't really see it before. She befriended me and had her life story told to me several times over within a week. Repetition of someone's life story is so draining in itself.  I am an empath and get everyone's life story some super interesting especially those who have grown from their life lessons, and learned a little wisdom along the way. They have helped me grow listening to them. Others such as my colleague well they are like a stuck record, I understand it is a trauma response because I was the same way for a long time, but I have grown beyond that and catch myself now if I fall into "poor me" and broken record for too long. I realise everyone has a story, everyone has lessons they've learned, some have grown from them, some are stuck. I feel sorry for those stuck because I too was there once, hence me continually trying to help and always listening. I come away having absorbed their energy though and feeling depressed/ angry/ whatever emotions they were feeling. I need to stop doing this for my own sanity seriously....I need to practice sending loving kindness from afar and not getting involved too much. Because I could have the best job in the world and would feel sad about going every shift if I worked with people that I am allowing to drain me like this.

I am not allowed to wear headphones either as I manage 17 other staff so wander around the entire shift to make sure everyone is working and doing what they're supposed to be doing. We have a new starter with us too at the moment, he is very sweet, kind, also a bit of a sponge for people's stories, and my colleague has already drained the life out of him. I actually took him off her yesterday and said I will train today, you go and do the other work we have. We usually work together but yesterday I kinda refused and did my own thing. I needed to for sanity purposes, and the new boy (I call him boy he is probably 20 but I am old so anyone my sons age or less I tend to do this oops) was re-telling me his life story (I did ask) he is from France, and has travelled quite a bit, it inspired me greatly. I used to be like that. I went straight home and got myself on right move and was searching for a new home I feel like I am in a waiting room at the moment....and I said to DP we need to make the move before we get too comfy...we shall see though. I think it depends greatly on finishing the snagging list here and whether DP gets his new job (he will want to be closer to the main roads if he does so we will have to move anyway) and how much the house is worth considering prices have dropped.

So this morning I have sent £3 PAD to mortgage OP (£30 for Feb so far). I am still continuing with this even though I have thrown a bit of a spanner in the works by wanting to move now and we probably should be looking at saving for solicitors fees and removal costs instead Nothing to TT as bank is at £.00 on the end.

4 more shifts at work and then a week off. Much needed. I shall hermit for the most part I think, cook, garden, and maybe a trip to the antique centre.
I did the s'bury shop online yesterday, less than £80! I have all the meals and stuff sorted but not many treats I was determined to try and bring the budget in on target. 
No refund from s'bury yet, and DP has no refund from the loan yet either. 

I have a hair cut booked on Thursday. I am supposed to be meeting colleague for tea and cake after, I will see how I feel but I am edging strongly towards cancelling it. I am meeting other friends (my spiritual friends that I met on a course) on Friday, that is always fun, upbeat and everyone comes away feeling good rather than sad and drained. Friday night DP & I have a date booked too! We are going to watch a tribute band, tickets booked months ago, looking forward to it as we haven't done too much together since I tightened the belts.

DD went to her open evening yesterday, I can't believe I got the day muddled (actually I can) and found out last minute it wasn't tonight, so I didn't go. It is another reason for wanting to move actually, both DS & DD have got places (DD is conditional on GCSEs though) at the same school and it is over an hours bus ride away. I would rather cut my losses here (hoping there isn't any though) and move to the outskirts of the city again and for the kids to be able to walk to school, and for me to find another job because there is very little scope where I live. Where I am, there are two main employers and I work for one of them, everywhere else is family run shops or farms and there isn't much else here. Hence why I have had no luck finding anything new - especially without transportation. 

Jacket spuds for dinner today, air cadets tonight, so I leave a note with instructions and timings for kids to put them on in the air fryer. DP is off to sunny Sheffield today for meetings so he won't be here to do it. I am in work early too as we have four off today *rolls eyes*...that should be a fun shift! 

I am off to see if I have anything to sell, I have been decluttering since the new year and have a lot of charity stuff to go, and only a few bits worth selling. I am sure I can find more if I look though

debtfreewannabe321

Goals for Feb (Jan 26-Feb 25):
1- 15 days free of social media 9/15

2- Practice gentle yoga every day for at least 10 minutes (it helps with nerve pain from sciatica)

7/13 every other day seems to be what I have fallen into lately. That is okay it is helping with the pain and I get enough exercise from walking on top of this for work and taking the dog out.

3- Read 1 book to the end 

4- Catch up with 3 friends in real life (am totally fed up with SM being our only interaction with people these days bring back pre internet days)

1/3 and two dates in the diary 

5- Two weeks of no sugar (I meant to do this in Jan but had too much Christmas sweets left)

total fail

6- NSD

 5/10

7- Get out in the garden and start the clear up after winter (we've dead fallen trees everywhere)

debtfreewannabe321

Today will be another NSD. I have signed up to some survey sites to help with extra money. I didn't find anything to sell but have found a few more bits to donate- feels good to declutter and freshen the energy in the home . 

debtfreewannabe321

Got my NSD yesterday, up to 6 already. Happy with that.
Work early today again. I am enjoying it much more now I have taken back some level of control, i/e I do not work myself to death because we have illness/ people off and I am covering them, and I am also changing subject whenever colleague brings up the same things she has told me a thousand times already. She got the hint yesterday and we actually had a fun shift and I didn't feel like crying for the first time after work in weeks.  

I joined some survey sites yesterday with a new email I made specifically for it and have been asked to join Prol1f1c and a few others already. Can't remember all their names though off hand. I will spend a few minutes each day looking to see what I can get on there. Not sure if any are good payers but I recall a few years back using them regularly to top up spends for the household in vouchers etc. 

I got my refund for s'bury this morning, TT 10p but left the £2 as I had to bail DP account out of the OD yesterday *oops* He is still waiting for his refund from the loan of £125, so a DD went out and sent him into the OD by a few quid. He isn't best pleased about this and had a moan about it being the best paid month he's ever had and yet he's still somehow broke. Of course we aren't, because we have money in pots in accounts, but in his current account and mine we are 'poor'. I sent a tenner over and then thought after I should have sent less because I have a hair cut to pay for tomorrow and a s'bury shop ! I can always borrow from the EF temporarily and send it back over when refund is in and my pay arrives in my account. I have already had my pay slip and there is about £50 overtime on this one. It might even arrive before the shopping so all might be okay. 

I am really seriously thinking about selling up again. We haven't even been here two years. I am wondering what the chances are of us being able to port our mortgage and get a top up secondary mortgage as I have seen some houses in lovely areas for sale....they are do-er uppers because we can't afford the nice houses in the nice areas but it would be so nice to be in an area I love. I love my house and it's done beautifully now, we have fantastic gardens and space but I dislike the area (town), I will think on it some more......

Hope everyone is okay. I am feeling a bit of a mid-month slump already so I will list my gratitudes here for today and then be off. 
* I am grateful DP has been put through to the second stage interview for tomorrow
* I am grateful my working week has been good
* I am grateful for all the food in my fridge, freezer and cupboards
* I am grateful to myself for taking time out this week to exercise and take long luxurious baths with books and no phone in hand...it has been good for my mental health
* I am thankful for my children, all three of them do me proud  
* I am grateful for my home, it is warm, dry and decorated beautifully and I enjoy being in it with all my belongings 
* And that leads on to my final gratitude of I am grateful for my record player, I haven't barely put the tv on this week but have instead listened to all the records we bought at the charity shop and enjoyed those instead. 

ladybird1106

Glad work has improved 
Love 🐞

debtfreewannabe321

It's snowing!
Annnnnnnnnnnnnnnd I have a hole in my boots oh the joys eh. 
How did I find out about the hole, well I went to get my hair cut this morning in town, walked the 10 minutes there and then back and by the time I was home, there were puddles everywhere, my feet felt like iceblocks and when I took my boots off my socks were soaked through.. Ugh. Snow is coming down pretty heavy, it is super cold in the house even with the heating on.

I don't really want to buy another pair of boots right now, so they are on a radiator and hopefully will be dry before work- my poor feet are under a blanket lol.

I paid for the hair cut out of emergency fund cash envelope I have  as I haven't been paid yet and I had to keep some money back in case I'm not paid by tomorrow morning, as the s'burys will be due out. I will take the cash out and replace it as soon as I am paid. The haircut should be out of my pocket money budget. Once I have shuffled the money back around I will only have £22.07 pocket money left until the 25th. And I am out for lunch tomorrow, so that may clear that one out completely. Might have to reassess the pocket money budget next month.
I had some money saving this morning though- I cancelled tea and cake with a friend (colleague from work). 1- my feet were soaked. 2- I have had just about enough moaning as I can take for one week and besides I will see her at work in a few hours. We usually go with two others who don't work with us any more but they cancelled, so I did too. I have instead treated myself to free tea and cake at home. Saving approx £10 I am also debating eating before going out tomorrow and just having a hot drink when there. They don't have much on the menu to be honest, that I am willing to eat, so I think I will just do that. I am more concerned about catching up with friends and a new baby than eating

I was invited to a survey this morning with payment for £85 , turned out they wanted to come into my home though and put monitors on my tv and wifi box and monitor my usage. No thank you. There are limits to what I will do to earn money. And that breached the limit. I clicked out of that one

DP did have his interview this morning however he has messaged me just now to say it was cancelled last minute because of snow he is already over there so will have to come back. That's a shame. He was fully prepared for it and psyched up. And to be honest I was too....never mind. The snow has got worse over the last two hours but it isn't settling here just yet. But apparently over the Peak District it has and the interviewer can't make it over.

Not a NSD but at least all spends were accounted for. A DD has come out, and the haircut. I will get dinner out of the freezer in a mo, dahl, and rice and any leftover salad. S'burys is due tomorrow morning so I will empty out the fridge of all the odd bits of fresh we have left today for lunch and dinner. DP is still waiting on his refund..... I love how companies demand we pay super quick but when they have money that rightfully belongs to us they like to take their damned time giving it back eh.

Nothing much else to report which is good I guess.

Will tally up my NSDs and TT and PADs in a separate post

debtfreewannabe321

Goals for Feb (Jan 26-Feb 25):
1- 15 days free of social media 9/15

2- Practice gentle yoga every day for at least 10 minutes (it helps with nerve pain from sciatica) done some today and last night  


3- Read 1 book to the end 

4- Catch up with 3 friends in real life (am totally fed up with SM being our only interaction with people these days bring back pre internet days)

1/3 and two dates in the diary - cancelled one but I have a catch up with 4 friends tomorrow so that will be done! So long as no one cancels  

5- Two weeks of no sugar (I meant to do this in Jan but had too much Christmas sweets left)

 total fail....don't ask.

6- NSD

 6/10 

7- Get out in the garden and start the clear up after winter (we've dead fallen trees everywhere)

PAD FEB RUNNING TOTAL: £35
TT FEB RUNNING TOTAL £3 
Grocery Challenge is still under budget I will add to it tomorrow though when the weekly shop is here. I haven't done a single top up shop ALL month so far! I am really proud of that. That is where ALL my spare money was disappearing to before. I hope to pay more over to the mortgage OP and EF before the end of the month but am still deciding whether I want to keep hold of one pay cheque this month to effectively get me ahead so this time next month I am not in the same position that I was in today of having to borrow from the EF to pay for my haircut! It is kind of annoying to be paid every couple of weeks because I am always waiting on money coming in. If I hold back one pay at the end of this month (because it should be extra to the budget) I can perhaps stop this cycle....it is also tempting to put it into EF or mortgage OP too though I am not sure what to do for the best....

beanielou

I would hold the money back. 

debtfreewannabe321

Thanks @beanielou it is the more sensible thing to do. I am getting impatient for reaching savings goals though and paying over to the mortgage overpayments. It does make sense to just get everything aligned first though, have enough money in the account all through the month, have my EF reach it's first goal, and then put everything spare over to the mortgage OP....