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Child abduction?

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  • Android07 said:
    My wife emigrated to England few years ago. We then had a child. When the child was six months, she told me she and our child had appointments at my surgery. I dropped them off and then she called me to say she is not coming back and then she disappeared with our child. I have since not heard from her and it has been a few years.

    Many advised me to apply for a child contact order but I did not go down this route as it costs £30k and takes 6 years on average. My wife also never came after me for child mainteanance.

    I then divorced her in her home country where I had married her.

    I have recently learned that my wife has gone abroad to her home country with our child. I was not aware of this and obviosuly she never contacted me to say she is going abroad.

    Now, can this be classed as child abduction? Who should I report this to? The Old bill or to the court?
    Which country has your ex-wife moved to with your child? That makes a huge difference in terms of what legal avenues are available to you including using the Hague Convention to return your child to the UK. The period of time since she left the UK will also have an impact on your legal options.
    The biscuit will only dare to be just a biscuit when it is with its true friend the potato. (Edward Monkton) :beer:
  • Mojisola
    Mojisola Posts: 35,571 Forumite
    Part of the Furniture 10,000 Posts Name Dropper
    elsien said:
    With regard to the legal rights, whilst technically there may be an avenue to return the child to the UK, I’m struggling to see any court insisting on a child being romoved from the primary care giver and returned to a parent who they have had no contact with for years, and who  has made no effort to address that. 
    Even more unlikely considering the info in the earlier post -
    "the Doctor was convinced that she was not safe with me"
    "she rang me to say that she would be staying with a family friend ... and that social services have been informed by the surgery."
    "Coppers then arrived and nicked me as my wife had complained that I was controlling and coercive."
    "I was released shortly after I reached the station as I had no prior DV reports and I had a clean record."

    On the last point - just because the wife hadn't previously felt able to make a report doesn't mean that all was well in the relationship.  Spouses here on a spousal visa are trapped in the relationship and find it even more difficult than resident Brits to report controlling behaviour.
  • Doodles
    Doodles Posts: 413 Forumite
    Part of the Furniture 100 Posts Photogenic
    Leave things be would be my advice.  You made no effort for years to find your child, or get the Police involved. You divorced her without instigating any action or child maintenance.   Now all of a sudden your concern over 'abduction'.  

    If there was a time for action, its long gone in my opinion.




  • sheramber
    sheramber Posts: 22,414 Forumite
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    Android07 said:
    My wife emigrated to England few years ago. We then had a child. When the child was six months, she told me she and our child had appointments at my surgery. I dropped them off and then she called me to say she is not coming back and then she disappeared with our child. I have since not heard from her and it has been a few years.

    Many advised me to apply for a child contact order but I did not go down this route as it costs £30k and takes 6 years on average. My wife also never came after me for child mainteanance.

    I then divorced her in her home country where I had married her.

    I have recently learned that my wife has gone abroad to her home country with our child. I was not aware of this and obviosuly she never contacted me to say she is going abroad.

    Now, can this be classed as child abduction? Who should I report this to? The Old bill or to the court?
    Why does it matter to you that your ex wife has taken your child’s to live with her abroad when you have not bothered to support or contact your child for years? 

    After the divorce she would not be entitled to remain in the country so would have to leave. 
  • Lavendyr
    Lavendyr Posts: 2,610 Forumite
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    Oh goodness, I went to the link kindly provided by another poster and remembered the first thread which I contributed to. I cannot believe this. 

    If your wife has not requested child maintenance, have you offered any? Do you actually care about the wellbeing of your child? What on earth do you want to achieve having shown no interest in your child? I worried from your first thread about coercive control and this only seems to continue that theme - an interest in control, not in your child's wellbeing. 
  • TBagpuss
    TBagpuss Posts: 11,236 Forumite
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    OK, it doesn't normally take 6 years or £30K to obtain a contact order. 
    Yes, your ex-wife should not have moved out of the jurisdiction without either getting your consent or a court order, however, unless she left very recently, it is likely that she has now established residence in her home country and that you would need to make an application there, for any orders relating to your child. Jurisdiction over issues relating to children is generally based on where the child is resident.

    In England and Wales (Scotland has a separated, but similar, system) in considering any application about a child, the focus is on what is in the child's best interests, it is not about either punishing, or being objectively fair, to the parents.

    Even if you did accuse your ex of abduction and a court had to decide how to deal with it, given that you have neither had any contact with the child, not made any attempt to re-establish contact, it's difficult to see how a court could decide it was in that child's best interests to force them back to the UK, particularly if your ex is without family or other support networks here , but has these in her home country.  

    Wrongful removal is a criminal offence, however, you would have to ask yourself what you motivation is and whether it is likely to help you in building a relationship with your child if you start by involving the police 

    However, your best bet would be to seek out a solicitor who is dual qualified here and in your ex's home country .
    https://www.reunite.org  may be a a useful starting point.


    All posts are my personal opinion, not formal advice Always get proper, professional advice (particularly about anything legal!)
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