Getting on track

enthusiasticsaver

I  can ask the forum team to move this thread to the diaries section if you wish? 

LeedsOnTheUp

Well guys this has gone horribly. I have tried really hard to keep things under control but events keep popping up that have me using credit and the repayments are now pushing me over the edge. I had my bath leak when it was emptied and it went straight through the ceilin and flooded the kitchen. I was advised to have work done on my prefab house which is over 2k and is considered high priority but I have been putting off and only now facing the problem. My garage has said they suspect an emissions pipe has cracked somewhere but they can't see it and they would need to open it up to try find it and then do the repair so can't quote me a price, but the issue is if I don't have the air on recirculate then the smell fills the car which I assume is not good at all health wise. My other half got ill which meant we have fallen back again and we are now in overdraft, and have had to use credit card to buy food and fuel a couple of times and repayments are now outrageous.

To be honest I think I have to put on my big boy pants now and face this head on so I've been reading a lot about DMPs. I was diagnosed with depression and generalised anxiety disorder around 13 years ago which I have made huge strides with, though it has aways remained, and this has brought it back full force. I don't have the mental clarity or bandwidth to cope and I really need some help because it's affecting every area of my life.

I have read many pages of the DMP mutual thread but I think I am just confusing myself with all the different information and I would like to ask a couple of questions if anyone might be kind enough to answer. I don't like to ask people to retread old ground so to speak but I am really struggling to take it all in with the way my mind is right now.

From what I understand I should cancel all the direct debits to creditors until I default. During this time is it advised to not communicate at all until the default is applied? If one provider decides to default after a month, do I need to not pay them until all have defaulted, and if so how likely is this to result in a CCJ? I have been looking at the NEDCAP website and would like to manage my own DMP when I have the breathing space but I would initally like to go with StepChange to help as I can't do this alone right now.

I am hugely struggling mentally and would appreciate any help people may be able to offer. A massive thank you to anybody who can.

enthusiasticsaver

Sorry you have had some issues come up.  You could ring stepchange as a first step. It will take longer than a month for the defaults to go through.  They have a process to follow. You do not need to contact them but if you are including an overdraft it is best to tell them as they may never default you.  You will need a new bank account with no overdraft. They are unlikely to proceed to court action so CCJ is very unlikely. 

Martico

And please don't feel concerned about asking lots of questions here, fearing you're going over old ground. Every person is different, and every person comes here new. It'd take up more of your time searching for the answers you want in old threads than asking a few questions here, so ask away. And I'm sorry to read of your circs

LeedsOnTheUp

enthusiasticsaver said:

Sorry you have had some issues come up.  You could ring stepchange as a first step. It will take longer than a month for the defaults to go through.  They have a process to follow. You do not need to contact them but if you are including an overdraft it is best to tell them as they may never default you.  You will need a new bank account with no overdraft. They are unlikely to proceed to court action so CCJ is very unlikely. 

I won't include the overdraft as I could easily get that paid off if I cancel the direct debits before saving for an emergency fund. Another question I have, and this seems quite scummy so please bear with me, is it a horrible idea to get some of the things I desperately need on the credit card before I cancel the direct debits? Like would spending on there before cancelling effect the process in any way? I'm not talking going out for lavish mes but for instance my girlfriend has one pair of trainers and they have holes in and we've been holding off until the situation improves. I was toying with the idea of also trying to leverage a bit of the credit to build the emergency fund as I think I saw that floated somewhere on the mega thread.

LeedsOnTheUp

LeedsOnTheUp said:

enthusiasticsaver said:

Sorry you have had some issues come up.  You could ring stepchange as a first step. It will take longer than a month for the defaults to go through.  They have a process to follow. You do not need to contact them but if you are including an overdraft it is best to tell them as they may never default you.  You will need a new bank account with no overdraft. They are unlikely to proceed to court action so CCJ is very unlikely. 

I won't include the overdraft as I could easily get that paid off if I cancel the direct debits before saving for an emergency fund. Another question I have, and this seems quite scummy so please bear with me, is it a horrible idea to get some of the things I desperately need on the credit card before I cancel the direct debits? Like would spending on there before cancelling effect the process in any way? I'm not talking going out for lavish mes but for instance my girlfriend has one pair of trainers and they have holes in and we've been holding off until the situation improves. I was toying with the idea of also trying to leverage a bit of the credit to build the emergency fund as I think I saw that floated somewhere on the mega thread.

I just want to add on this, that it seems very 'against the rules' but playing by the rules has got me to where I am today (along with years of me being an absolute fool).

Im not blaming the creditors or anybody else for that matter but I am worried about life after credit and want to build up the best reserves I can because once I start the ball rolling I never want to use credit again.

EssexHebridean

Allowing that your previous SOA did show you with a surplus, I'd say that avoiding using the cards now would be a better idea to be honest. First thing is also to look at the things you "need" and really quiz yourself - do you need them or just want them? Then have a think about whether they are currently in your budget somewhere - if so, can they wait until the next month to be bought, so falling within a new pay period where there will be a new budgeted sum for them?  I try to work through a process of thinking - "Do I actually need it? If I do, then do I have anything else that will work instead of buying a new X? If no, then where can I buy the thing for the best price - for example, is it something I could buy second hand?" before shopping for stuff. It just builds in a bit of a pause which can be a good habit. So in the case of the trainers - she doesn't have any others? You've said not, so in that case, might she be willing to look on somewhere like Vinted for example for a second hand (or perhaps even brand new) replacement at a better price? I can't cope with truly second hand shoes (they give me the ick) but am willing to buy BNIB items like that. And then, allowing that you have £40 in the budget for clothes, if she holds off just another week, they can be bought from that budget, perhaps? 

Everyone wonders how they will cope "without credit" but once you actually get to a position where you are in control of your money, rather than it controlling you, you may well find that actually, using a credit card which is set up to clear IN FULL (Martin voice there!) is perfectly achievable - there are plenty of us here to tell that tale! 

LeedsOnTheUp

EssexHebridean said:

Allowing that your previous SOA did show you with a surplus, I'd say that avoiding using the cards now would be a better idea to be honest. First thing is also to look at the things you "need" and really quiz yourself - do you need them or just want them? Then have a think about whether they are currently in your budget somewhere - if so, can they wait until the next month to be bought, so falling within a new pay period where there will be a new budgeted sum for them?  I try to work through a process of thinking - "Do I actually need it? If I do, then do I have anything else that will work instead of buying a new X? If no, then where can I buy the thing for the best price - for example, is it something I could buy second hand?" before shopping for stuff. It just builds in a bit of a pause which can be a good habit. So in the case of the trainers - she doesn't have any others? You've said not, so in that case, might she be willing to look on somewhere like Vinted for example for a second hand (or perhaps even brand new) replacement at a better price? I can't cope with truly second hand shoes (they give me the ick) but am willing to buy BNIB items like that. And then, allowing that you have £40 in the budget for clothes, if she holds off just another week, they can be bought from that budget, perhaps? 

Everyone wonders how they will cope "without credit" but once you actually get to a position where you are in control of your money, rather than it controlling you, you may well find that actually, using a credit card which is set up to clear IN FULL (Martin voice there!) is perfectly achievable - there are plenty of us here to tell that tale! 

Thanks a lot for the very detailed and clear answer. I think the fact that I'm considering using even more credit shows how I've gotten in to this mess. I do try to keep it thrifty where possible but my mind is all over the place and so I didn't even think that I literally will have a clothing budget.

Final questions before I proceed I suppose are, do I literally just cancel the direct debits or should I be sending a letter to the creditors saying I am taking advice in relation to a DMP when I cancel them? And if I write to creditors requesting they only contact me by writing, is it possible that they will still send debt collectors (not bailiffs, the self-employed ones) or try phoning me all the time? I am expecting stress but want to reduce this where possible.

enthusiasticsaver

You can just cancel the direct debits.  You can write to them and ask them to only contact you in writing and tell them your plans.  Don't make any arrangements to pay.  They stay on file longer than defaults. There will be no debt collectors but initially you may get phone calls. 

I don't think you should use credit cards to pay for stuff now.  You need to move away from using credit now.  Save up for emergencies and allow for clothing in your budget going forward. 

LeedsOnTheUp

enthusiasticsaver said:

You can just cancel the direct debits.  You can write to them and ask them to only contact you in writing and tell them your plans.  Don't make any arrangements to pay.  They stay on file longer than defaults. There will be no debt collectors but initially you may get phone calls. 

I don't think you should use credit cards to pay for stuff now.  You need to move away from using credit now.  Save up for emergencies and allow for clothing in your budget going forward. 

This perfectly answers what I was confused about. I agree that I should not be using credit and I am going to shred all the cards tonight, remove them from all websites or browsers they may be saved on and delete all the apps. Enough is enough and I will get this thing rolling. Thank you everybody for your help, and if anybody with the power to do so could please move this to the diaries section I would appreciate it as I want to use this as a place to log my progress and see how far I've come. A truly excellent community.