Flying solo

twiggy86

Thanks both for your messages. 

Bf's dad did pass yesterday morning. I think in some ways it's a relief as his dad was suffering and it was quite drawn out. So I cancelled netball last night and went with bf to talk to his son. There's nothing else that can really be done at the moment so bf will still go on holiday on Sunday (until late Wednesday) and then will start thinking about what needs to be done next week. (They don't want a funeral, so that doesn't need to be organised). Instead today he is going to see his mum as she is finally moving into a care home today after being in hospital since her stroke in January. They are undecided whether or not to tell her about their dad, as moving might be enough today without that grief - although they were no longer on speaking terms, they had been together a long time before they split. 

So I'm working from home today so that I'm around if needed. Bf still wants to go to the show tonight (well at the moment he does), so it also selfishly means less rushing around when I finish work. The sensible thing to do is to have dinner before we leave to keep costs low. I did pay for bf to have a massage yesterday - which he'd had booked already - as he got a new job, so it was my treat. 

Bits and pieces for today:

• Pop to Tesco for a couple of bits - collect parcel and get petrol whilst there 
• Put tortoises in the garden for the first time this year! (Means I can turn their lamp off) 
• Update spreadsheet 
• Work on some knitting (not had time to do much this week) 
• Meals from stores 

badmemory

If she has any dementia then I would say don't.  My mother had dementia & had been writing to her best friend every week since she married my dad, so well over 60 years.  She carried on writing via my sister for a year until she died.  Mum asked about her so we told her & obviously she was very upset, then a few days later she asked again & was upset all over again.  After a few repeats we decided to lie.  Which is crueller to lie or to put someone weekly through a massive grief.

Obviously if sure she is fully with it then maybe wait until she is settled or maybe even asks.

Floss

Sorry to read about BFs dad, sometimes folk hang on until their nearest & dearest are away from them to die so not to burden them.

Good that you figured out the interest - it always frustrates me when my spreadsheets are adrift!

twiggy86

Nice weekend but busy and spent more than I would have liked. 

Friday me and bf went to the show which was good and bf enjoyed. Spent money on a couple of drinks and parking. Then Saturday we went for breakfast and then bought some bits for the house - so £50 from the house pot. It was then a relaxed afternoon and an early night as had to be up at 3:30 am to drop him at the airport! Decided to embrace being awake early so after I dropped him off, I grabbed the pooch and a cuppa and met a friend by the beach to watch the sunrise! I then went to meet some friends - I drove with the intention of not drinking but ended up leaving my car! So then yesterday I was awake early so walked the dog first thing to retrieve my car - was lucky that I didn't get a parking ticket! Then met some friends to some acro at a park (so was free), popped in to see my parents (mum fed me lunch!) before relaxing for the afternoon! 

Spreadsheet has been updated to reflect all the various spending - plus the refund I received for some tickets for an event that was cancelled. Need to decide where to allocate the £35 that I received - in light of what I said last week re goals/ plans, will likely be one of my "pots". I have also paid the minimum on one of the CCs as the statement had come in.  

Tonight will be a quiet night, catching up on some housework and knitting! I will just have something out of the freezer for dinner. Not sure if bf will be travelling up North on Thursday (but he needs to be back Friday afternoon as we have his kids this weekend), so am holding off food shopping until I know how the rest of the week looks. 

Today's bits and bobs...

• Make lunch to take to work 
• Update spreadsheet 
• Make CC payment 
• Email new employer about something
• Load of washing on 30 degree quick cycle 
• Hang washing on airer
• Sort out bf's clothes to see what to sell on Vinted (it's clothes he doesn't want and was going to put in a clothes bin but I asked if I could try to sell!)   
• Dinner from stores 
• Work on knitted top 

twiggy86

My weekly list of goals... 

Finances:

• Allocate refund £35 
• Catch up on spending totals i.e. sort into categories  
• Start listing bf's bits on Vinted 

House:

• Put some bits in the loft 
• Get something down from loft to sort/ dump/ donate
• Measure up for new desk and start looking around at options 

Crafting: 

• Progress knitted top 
• Finish one arm on knitted jumper 

satchmo1

Sad time for your bf, and I understand his conundrum re telling his mum - my sister and I decided not to tell my mum (who had sunk deeply into dementia and thought we were her sisters) that her son had passed. We reckoned she'd get a surprise when she reached heaven (and hoped it was a lovely surprise).

On the current job front, just a little reminder - don't forget to transfer any personal files from your work computer and then when you've installed them on your personal laptop remember to delete them at work. I was reminded today that I hadn't copied a document that was both work and personal as it was a talk I was giving. I was trying to find it today to get the exact wording of an anecdote I had included.

twiggy86

I have set up a google drive for exactly that reason @satchmo1 - all the crochet/ knitting patterns, budget and random other docs are now sitting in there so I can access! 

I ended up having a pie and chips for dinner - which is good as this one lonely pie had been in the freezer a while! Meaning that yesterday was a NSD! I do have some bits and bobs to buy today - some tortoise food, something for my knitting and some health related bits. I then have acro tonight - really looking forward to the class as will be doing "pop"! Plna is then to come home and have a quick shower before heading back out to collect bf from the airport. He's due to land just after 10pm, so will likely be a late night by the time he's got his bags and got out of there - good job I'm working from home tomorrow! 

So today's actual list is...

• Make lunch to take to work 
• Email new employer as still having an issue accessing something! 
• Update spreadsheet 
• Quick dinner from stores 
• Little bit of tidying around 
• Pay lowest amount at acro
• Park somewhere near the airport to avoid going into the carpark until bf is ready 

twiggy86

Tired today after picking bf up from the airport last night, but thankfully working from home today! I managed to park on a side road near the airport and he walked out to meet me, so no parking costs! He can organise the bits he needs to do re his dad's death from here, so he isn't heading off again just yet. 

Had a fun class at acro before picking him up, paid the lowest amount so that's £7.50 from the fitness pot plus another £5.90 for netball tonight. I also finally managed to get the online screening completed for the new job last night, so hopefully everything is all set! 

Today I have/will:

• Update spreadsheet 
• Make CC payment 
• Pop bits in loft 
• Pull a couple of bits down from the loft (as slowly trying to sort) - gone straight in the bin
• Measure space for desk 
• Work on spending categories 
• Hang washing on airer  
• Do food shop with bf 
• Snap receipt
• Meals from stores
• Park for free at netball 

twiggy86

Oh something I have had on my radar is my student loan. I am getting down to near the £1,000 mark left (although just went to log in to check and I've locked myself out of the account!) so been thinking about changing it to direct debit. The direct debit is based on the amount you are have been paying as a deduction, and as my salary is about to go up so will the amount I pay - so should be gone within the next 12 months hopefully! However, it says it takes 3 months to go through so I'm not sure whether to do it now or if changing jobs in the middle of that 3 months will just complicate things all round! 

So I think what I'm going to do is wait until after I have started and received my first pay and then switch it over to ensure there are no issues. I'd say it will good once it's gone and I get the extra £100-odd in my salary but no doubt I'll lose a chunk of this with tax and other deductions! 

badmemory

With your student loan I thought you could only change it to DD for a new tax year as I believe (believe not know) your employer can't do in year changes.  I'm sure there is something on MSE somewhere about it as they recommend that when you are getting very low.