Considering getting a second cat - any MSE advice?

Mrs_Z

Going back to the OP's question. I think it will be very tricky to successfully introduce another cat to your household in the hope that they will become best buddies. Probably it would be easiest to introduce a kitten rather than an adult cat but then you must consider your older cat - the kitten will want to play non stop and this is likely to annoy and irritate him on the long run.
From a personal experience I can tell this: I had the same thought when we got our 1st cat - I felt that she  (1,5yrs at the time) must be feeling lonely as we were both working full time and she used to sit side by side with the neighbour's cat on their shed roof. So we got another cat from a local rescue, similar age, and they never ever got on. They tolerated each other but were never buddies. If anything, the 2nd cat established herself as the new 'boss' very quickly and I felt quilty having ruined the peaceful life of our 1st cat.  Later, we ended up with a 3rd cat (long story) - and again, they never got on but tolerated one another.  Fast forward 10+ years and the time came when cat no 3 became the only cat and her personality changed almost overnight from a somewhat stroppy madam to sweetest thing on this earth.  I think it was the realisation that she now was the only cat in the house and the center of universe.
I have to add that at the time, the introductions were not done properly - on both times when the new cats joined the household, we just opened the carrier, and let them to get on with it. Totally what you should not do - but we just didn't know better at the time.
Currently we have 4 cats (2 pairs). Cats 4 & 5 are a sister and a brother rescue, have always been together and are good buddies; groom each other and sleep in the same bed quite often. We got them after no 3 had transitioned to the rainbow bridge so no issues there.
Then almost 2 years ago we got cats 6 (5yr old) & 7 (14yr old) (inherited from a dear fried who sadly passed away); another pair but not related and they are not buddies to each other at all - my friend had taken the kitten as a replacement to an older cat who had to be pts. You can see that he wants to play from time to time and the older one doesn't want to know.
Introducing the new pair to our own cats was done carefully and little by little. Again, they are not friends by any means but do not fight either. The young one has established himself as the 'boss' and the others are a bit weary of him as he can be boisterous. Brother & sister keep themselves to themselves and don't really mix with the moggies. All in all, they are ok, maybe helps that it's 3 males and 1 female. Less feline politics compared to the old times when we had 3 females.
Just one more thing - having more cats absolutely does not make it any easier to leave them.... so yes, you pay more to have them but you sure save on holidays!!

strandedinaber

Thank you so much everyone - this is so so helpful.

I think I am going to leave this for a while. The main issue is that I still want to be able to go on holiday and see family. I would be away for about a week. My cat already loves his catsitter who will come in for two 30 min slots a day but it feels so so mean to leave him alone. I knew they were a tie but thought oh he'll be fine with a sitter - I just didn't factor in the guilt 😞

kimwp

I know how you feel, I feel terrible going away. Have you looked at the possibility of someone holidaying in your house and looking after your cat at the same time? It obviously depends on how comfortable you feel with the risk of a stranger in your home. You could potentially do it more informally with friends or family if you live in an area they might want to holiday.

strandedinaber

kimwp said:

I know how you feel, I feel terrible going away. Have you looked at the possibility of someone holidaying in your house and looking after your cat at the same time? It obviously depends on how comfortable you feel with the risk of a stranger in your home. You could potentially do it more informally with friends or family if you live in an area they might want to holiday.

I've been looking at that option, but he's also potentially asthmatic (we're not convinced, but out of options). He's never not been ok after an attack but I'm just starting him on an inhaler now. So I would have to have someone holidaying who was comfortable giving him an inhaler twice daily or pay for someone holidaying and the catsitter to do the inhaler.

He was ok when I was last away for about four days. I think I'll just do a week at Christmas and see if I can get a friend to pop in and play at some point as well...

kimwp

Oh! I don't think you pay for someone holidaying - I think it's an exchange - free accommodation for pet-sitting (though I guess there are different set-ups). Then the petsitter could come in to do the inhaler (and probably let you know the house was ok too).

gocurlygirl

Daughter does cat sitting, but only occasionally 
Used to be with an agency but left as her new job meant she couldn't spend as much time as she liked to with them (1/2 to 1 hour). Seems much better for the cats.
I cat sit too- my daughters cats!