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British Gas will not setup an online account for me

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I had an online chat with British Gas about this problem and they were unable to setup an online account for me, or tell me why they couldn't do it.
I gave them all my details.
I have an account number and an active direct debit with them.
They send me emails asking me for a meter reading (which of course I cannot do online as directed, as I have no online account).
On their website it says that it takes just minutes to setup an online account.
I have spent hours so far - to no avail.
On any scale of competence, they score 0.

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