Should I change my joint account with my separated husband

teadrinker24

Hi, 
Hoping for some advice. My husband has moved out of the country but we still joint own a property with a mortgage. I pay for the mortgage and everything. We still have a joint account which the only thing being paid in is my earnings but obviously the mortgage is going out which is in both our names. There are also other small outgoings in his name mainly past debts and other household bills in both our names. My husband suffers from various mental health issues and finds discussing such matters detrimental to his health, so I'm  not sure which way to go. I have broached the subject of a divorce with him but again he is not able to engage on this subject and as he is not resident in this country it has now dragged on for over 3 years with no progress. Thank you for any advice. 

born_again

Yes.
Look at it this way. He could empty the account.
But may not be that easy to remove them. Some require both parties to agree.

I would open a new account, pay your wages & bills from that. Once set up, advise the JT acc bank the account is in dispute due to your current situation of being separated.

As to property, that will need proper legal advice.

DullGreyGuy

I didnt bother cancelling a joint loan that I had with an ex (unmarried) as it was over half way through and interest rates hadnt gone in the right direction. I was paying it without contributions from her as I'd kept the car it had been used to finance. 

18 months or so later I had my bank accounts closed, not for my political views but because my ex had got into some financial difficulties and the bank closed all of her accounts inc the loan which meant closing all my accounts because of the association. 

With him being overseas its less likely that there will be contagion but whilst yo share financial products your records are linked and you will continue to be impacted by his decisions.  

Jude57

teadrinker24 said:

Hi, 
Hoping for some advice. My husband has moved out of the country but we still joint own a property with a mortgage. I pay for the mortgage and everything. We still have a joint account which the only thing being paid in is my earnings but obviously the mortgage is going out which is in both our names. There are also other small outgoings in his name mainly past debts and other household bills in both our names. My husband suffers from various mental health issues and finds discussing such matters detrimental to his health, so I'm  not sure which way to go. I have broached the subject of a divorce with him but again he is not able to engage on this subject and as he is not resident in this country it has now dragged on for over 3 years with no progress. Thank you for any advice. 

This is a situation where you really need professional legal advice but I'd say that you need to untangle your finances from your estranged husband as soon as possible. Your first step should be to open your own bank account for your salary to be paid into. You should also seek to remove yourself from the joint account but others will know whether this is possible without your estranged husband's written consent. You can move your direct debit payments to your new account very easily and as long as the mortgage is being paid, the mortgage lender won't care whose account the payment comes from. It's a simple job to transfer all household bills into your sole name. Make sure, if you are the only adult living in the house, that you claim Single Person Discount (25%) on your Council Tax. Are you able to take on the mortgage based on just your salary? An independent mortgage broker could advise what your options are if you want to keep the house. If any of the past debts being paid from the joint account are in your estranged husband's sole name, you are not liable for them and can stop paying them. You could let the creditors know he's left the country but don't engage further with them. If in doubt, seek support from Citizens Advice or StepChange Debt Charity.

I think it's important that you understand that your estranged husband's mental health issues are not your responsibility. Those issues are for him to deal with and it's unfair that you are unable to move on with your life for fear of him being somehow unable to cope. I feel I must also say that, in some cases, the threat of damage to mental health can be a control mechanism, used to keep a partner, even an ex-partner, in line. Your estranged husband was mentally well enough these past three years to leave the country and start a new life (or pick up the threads of an old life) abroad so presumably has some income either from work or other sources. This seems to indicate that there are some aspects of life with which he copes adequately and perhaps it's worth considering the impact of this unresolved situation on your own mental health over the past three years, as well as the impact going forward if it remains unresolved.

Finally, I'd strongly recommend that you see a Family Law solicitor as a matter of urgency. You don't need your estranged husband's permission or cooperation to obtain a divorce, although of course it's often simpler if you have it. You need to protect your legal position as regards the house, if you want to keep it and financially, including your savings and pensions. You don't mention children but if there are any from the marriage, your estranged husband should of course be paying child support and in any event, custody should be formally arranged for the protection of the children's best interests.

thegreenone

"My husband suffers from various mental health issues and finds discussing such matters detrimental to his health"

Yet he finds it acceptable for you to pay for everything, including his debts?  I accept there may be more to it.

As above.  New bank account, move DDs and keep meticulous records of every penny you spend on the house/bills etc.

Remove your name from the joint account and if possible, let his creditors know what is happening and that his debts are now his responsibility.  Contact him (if you can) to let him know what you have done.

It's a sad end to a marriage but there's only so much you can do.  You need to keep a roof over your head and provide for your future. 

I may be blunt, I apologise, but I do wish you the very best.

teadrinker24

Thanks for the advice. I will look into opening a sole account for my pay and transfer money to pay the mortgage and debts. Hope that will be possible as probably have a bad credit score due to the past. Luckily he has no card for the joint account so would be hard for him to obtain the money, although I admit not impossible.
I am concerned if I don't keep the payments up on his debts the creditors will come after the house. The monthly payments are minimum as i went to court on his behalf. Obviously worry about him taking equity out of the house, but I understand he can't do this without my consent.
I also agree legal advice would be good. I do have a solicitor but the money they charge is in my mind extortionate and don't have excess cash for this so trying to sort most of it myself. Even they have told me it's not a straightforward case.

Thanks again for all your advice and kind words. It's appreciated 

thegreenone

Find out if HIS debts are unsecured on the house.  If they are, he needs to pay them - not you.

Grumpelstiltskin

Get  yourself across to this section of the forum.

Debt-free wannabe — MoneySavingExpert Forum

Explain your financial problems, but if the debts are just normal consumer debts and in his sole name you are not responsible for them and no one will come after the house, it's only if they have been secured on the house then there could be problems.

RAS

Agree with Grumpelstiltskin. Go over to the DFW forum and detail the debts, and any arrangements.

If you'd not been paying for the last three years, they'd be half way to statute barred. Unsecured debts can't for practical purposes be chased through the courts if the debtor is outside the country.

Jude57

teadrinker24 said:

Thanks for the advice. I will look into opening a sole account for my pay and transfer money to pay the mortgage and debts. Hope that will be possible as probably have a bad credit score due to the past. Luckily he has no card for the joint account so would be hard for him to obtain the money, although I admit not impossible.
I am concerned if I don't keep the payments up on his debts the creditors will come after the house. The monthly payments are minimum as i went to court on his behalf. Obviously worry about him taking equity out of the house, but I understand he can't do this without my consent.
I also agree legal advice would be good. I do have a solicitor but the money they charge is in my mind extortionate and don't have excess cash for this so trying to sort most of it myself. Even they have told me it's not a straightforward case.

Thanks again for all your advice and kind words. It's appreciated 

It would be wise to put a Property Alert in place so that your estranged husband can't do anything with the house without you knowing:

https://www.gov.uk/guidance/property-alert

Please don't use any similar looking site to register an Alert because they charge a fee for something you can do yourself, free.

TBagpuss

YEs. Open a new account in your sole name and have your wages paid into that, move the direct debits etc. Even though the mortgage is in joint names there is no reason the direct debit to pay it can't go out of an account in your sole, it may even be helpful for you to do it that way as it is clearer that you are the one paying it which may be relevant longer term.

You won't be able to close the joint account without his cooperation but you should be able to freeze it, once you have withdrawn any remaining funds and transferred all of the regulars payments in or out .
You can start divorce proceedings even if your husband doesn't wish to discuss it. Divorce is now on a no fault basis and if you are living in the UK you can start the process here even if he is not. Serving the papers on him may be a bit more complicated, f he ignored them, but not impossible.

Once you have a divorce started you can also look at getting the financial side of things sorted. If he chooses not to cooperate then it will slow things done but it can be done.

If you have poor credit then it may be in your interests for there to be a wait before you try to get a financial order, the court is likely to order the house to be sold if you can't get a mortgage to buy him out, or at least to get the current mortgage cleared to take his name off, so focus on improving your credit so you are in a stronger position to get a mortgage, whether for this property or another, in due course.