Kids and joint mortgage

RyanHello

I have a friend who is currently living in a house with her two children. Her mortgage is joint with her boyfriend. Boyfriend has cheated, moved out and is demanding the house be sold so he can have his "money".. He has no interest in the children's wellbeing. 

My friend cannot afford to carry on paying the mortgage on her own. She has an appointment booked with a solicitor next week.  

Where does my friend stand?

elsien

Presuming they’re not married, and they didn’t draw up any sort of document explaining what would happen in the circumstances, she probably has a little option but to sell and move on. 

I’m not sure why you’ve put “his” in inverted commas because he would be entitled to his share in any equity. How much equity is there in the house?
His cheating is irrelevant to the financial situation.

p00hsticks

Are the children his ?

Caz3121

RyanHello said:

My friend cannot afford to carry on paying the mortgage on her own. 

If she cannot afford the current mortgage it is likely she will be unable to afford to borrow extra to buy him out (assuming their is equity to share) and won't be able to afford higher payments so selling is likely the best option.

TBagpuss

Assuming they are his children, she is entitled to child maintenance from him to support them. If he is currently paying towards the mortgage then she is likely to be better off waiting until the house is sold before she applies for maintenance, as it's likely the mortgage (or 50% pf it) will be higher than the child support and he may well not be able to cover both.

Otherwise, it sounds as though she can't afford to remain in the house so it will need to be sold, the sale proceeds will be used to clear the mortgage and pay any costs relating to the sale (estate agents etc.) and then, unless they had a declaration of trust providing for them to have unequal shares, they would each get 50% of the remaining funds.

If she was in a position to buy him out (bank of mum and dad? )then she could offer to pay him a lump sum equal to what he would get if the house were sold, but it's unlikely he would agree unless she could also get a mortgage in her own name in order to get his name off the mortgage. 

The fact that he cheated is unfortunate, but also irrelevant to their financial situation.

He will be liable to provide financial support for his children whether or not he cares about their welfare but this is based on his income, not on the actual cost of caring for a child. It's likely to be in the children's interest to have contact with him, he is their dad regardless of the relationship between him and the mum. 

Even if they were married, it still sounds as though it would be likely that the house would need to be sold, as it would be very unusual to have a situation where a partner was expected to carry on paying towards a mortgage when they were not living in the house, so if she can't afford it on her own, even in a divorce it would most likely be sold. 

Exodi

RyanHello said:

I have a friend who is currently living in a house with her two children. Her mortgage is joint with her boyfriend. Boyfriend has cheated, moved out and is demanding the house be sold so he can have his "money".. He has no interest in the children's wellbeing. 

My friend cannot afford to carry on paying the mortgage on her own. She has an appointment booked with a solicitor next week.  

Where does my friend stand?

Whose children are they?

I think as they aren't married, your friend probably didn't need a solicitor to tell them the house would inevitably need to be sold (the alternative being to default on the mortgage, trash both of their credit files and inevitably have the house repossessed and sold regardless). It's not an option to 'force' an unmarried ex-partner to pay the mortgage on a property they don't live in, while somehow paying rent on their own place, while possibly also being liable for child maintenance for two children.

As elsien said, the circumstances are horrendous, but there's no reason to use quotations around "his money" as if they own as joint tenants (as alluded to), he is undoubtedly entitled to half the net proceeds. Presumably he paid towards the mortgage/deposit.

FWIW, I was cheated on by my ex of 10 years with a house involved, in which she disproportionately benefited. The situation sucked and I gave her the money with a forced smile through gritted teeth, but the sooner they are out of your life, the better. My life is much happier now, as I'm sure your friends will be once this is all sorted - dragging these sort of things on is in nobodies interest.

Stateofart

You need to buy him out, if not, it needs to be sold and split.  If the kids are his there might be some wriggle-room to stay and take maintenance (for a judge to decide). If not, it's really like two friends falling out - he needs his money back from a business arrangement in essence.