Managing phobia tips

strawb_shortcake

Help please! 

I had a life long phobia of spiders, had treatment hypnotherapy through the zoo 3-4 years ago. Which I always felt worked quite well. 

But, today I'm home alone wfh and spotted a rather large one in the kitchen. I tried to vacuum it up - I know I shouldn't! But I don't know if I got it or not? Know I'm struggling to even move off the sofa in case I see it again. 

Has anyone got any tips on how to manage this please? 

I know it can't hurt me, I know it's verging on irrational, I know dealing with it won't be as bad as my body/head feels it will be. 

I've held a house one as part of the treatment, I've got rid of spiders one way or other in the past - but being at home on my own is making me panic. 

Friends and family don't get phobias and will just tell me not to be so stupid 

london21

Mine is dogs.

It is hard, still looking for solutions myself 

strawb_shortcake

The zoo course really helped me at the time, I think for myself as spiders are quite seasonal my resilience goes up and down throughout the year.

I didn't think hypnotherapy would work but seeing 12 people change fundamentally in a matter of hours I wish I'd tried it far earlier - maybe I need to look into top up sessions 

Malthusian

Doing the thing that previously worked again is the obvious solution.
The other thing I would say is that there is nothing wrong with vaccuuming them up. I love spiders and always carefully remove them to the garden. But if a fellow human being has a phobia about them, then they have the right to kill them same as I have the right to eat bacon. Vacuum them, stomp on them, trap them under a jar and then put your phone next to it and force them to watch Teletubbies for the rest of their life if you like.
(Ok, I shouldn't endorse needless animal cruelty, but the point is that the spider has the same right to life in your home that a fly does in mine.)
If you have a phobia about spiders then the last thing you need is a guilt complex as well. At the moment you are being cuckooed by your eight-legged friends. You don't want them in your house but you also feel it would be wrong to throw them out (dead or alive) even though they have no right to be there.
Ignore your family and friends. Being freaked out when you see a creepy-crawly is not "stupid", it is just a mental habit which can be broken. If you were living in Australia it would be a rational way to feel. (There's an episode of Peppa Pig which is banned on Australian TV because Peppa is taught that spiders are nothing to be scared of. In Australia this episode could get a child killed.) People telling you that the way you think is "stupid" is likely to make the phobia worse not better, as your mind perceives an attack and sets up defences. There's a reason people don't hand over money to professionals to tell them that they are being silly and to pull themselves together.

strawb_shortcake

Thanks @Malthusian, it did get better as the day went on and my OH was fat more supportive than I'd given him credit for.

I managed to track down the hypnotherapist that I'd used before so think a session or two may help to build up my resilience and give me a few mechanisms to work with.

The therapy really helped before, the science behind a phobia is really quite fascinating. 

But, I did grow up having people make fun of my phobia so always assume others to treat me the same.

As my OH pointed out how I managed today is a massive improvement from how I would have been 4 years ago. I even hot bit by a false widow a couple of years back and whilst painful it was a whole lot easier to deal with without a phobia on top

MalMonroe

What helped me with my spider phobia was really simple - I bought one of those spider catchers from Amazon. (But you can get them from other places.) I live with my daughter but she's just as phobic as I am when it comes to spiders and other crawly things. So as the oldest, I felt it was up to me to do something. Even though I hate them, I can't kill them. 

The catcher was terrifying to use at first, if I'm honest, in case they escaped but now I've got the hang of it (and they don't escape - except for once when I held the thing upside down).

Daft as it is, I always feel really proud of myself because not only can I rid a room of a spider, I can also put it outside and be proud that I've saved a life. I've even used it to save a few moths - my biggest phobia of all - and it feels good to set them free and know that you are a hero. (Well, that's how I look at it anyway and it works for me.)

The problem with vacuuming them away is that then they are somewhere in your vacuum cleaner. 

And I was mocked by everybody when I was younger because of my phobia of butterflies and moths and also caterpillars - where they originate. As I grew older that phobia spread to spiders and I literally go cold when I see any of the offenders. But I quickly get my catcher and use it and pop them outside. I am not saying that I'm cured of phobias by any means but I am a life saver. 

libra10

Good luck with your phobia.

Mine is frogs, I hate the evil eyed, leapy critters.

Luckily it's usually only Spring and Summer when they're hopping about.