Simplifying Life

meanmarie

I live in the house where my great grandmother was born...and the amount of 'stuff' here is incredible. I had intended to leave the whole lot for my (7) children to fight over after I die, but have decided that, starting in June on my birthday...well won't be here for that but my wedding anniversary is in July: I am going to offer the pick of something in the house to each of my children, in chronological order. In my opinion very little of what I had has more than sentimental value so there will not be a financial gain to one over the other and I feel that each will not have a problem taking one thing and I will get rid of some of my clutter without making a decision on what to give to whom myself. Does anyone think that this is a good idea?

Marie

ceridwen

misty-moodles wrote: »

Hello Mary and Charis, thank you both for your replies.

Some really useful suggestions there, actually Charis I think my MIL sounds very much like your late MIL in that 'gently' doesn't really have any effect at all - I think I'm being a bit too careful with her, she does take offence very easily! She's never really had to compromise at all in her life and rather expects everyone else to fall in to line with her way of thinking.

I was thinking along the lines of shelves in her room, and love the idea of rotating things - that could work really well - thank you both for suggesting that.

I'm hoping the auction will go well and the money raised spur her on into further decluttering, but I think its rather a forlorn hope. I think we're going to have some interesting times ahead! Wish me luck!

Sounds like you're in line for a nomination for sainthood! Think the ornaments would be the least of my worries in your position - from your comment that MIL takes offence very easily. Good luck!!! 'Fraid I cant think of any tactful suggestions to offer you here re the ornaments - as tact isnt my strong point - thats on my work in progress list:D

ceridwen

meanmarie wrote: »

I live in the house where my great grandmother was born...and the amount of 'stuff' here is incredible. I had intended to leave the whole lot for my (7) children to fight over after I die, but have decided that, starting in June on my birthday...well won't be here for that but my wedding anniversary is in July: I am going to offer the pick of something in the house to each of my children, in chronological order. In my opinion very little of what I had has more than sentimental value so there will not be a financial gain to one over the other and I feel that each will not have a problem taking one thing and I will get rid of some of my clutter without making a decision on what to give to whom myself. Does anyone think that this is a good idea?

Marie

Could be worth a thought that idea. I would try and deal with things as much as poss. one way or other before you die. No idea what your children are like or how they get on with each other (or otherwise)......but it could be a bit dicey leaving them to "fight over" who gets what when you go. Better probably to "parcel" things out gradually between them......or leave written instructions for later as to how these things get divided exactly, eg "my collection of jugs to DD1, my teasets to DD2, etc".

misty-moodles

ceridwen wrote: »

Sounds like you're in line for a nomination for sainthood! Think the ornaments would be the least of my worries in your position - from your comment that MIL takes offence very easily. Good luck!!! 'Fraid I cant think of any tactful suggestions to offer you here re the ornaments - as tact isnt my strong point - thats on my work in progress list:D

Hi ceridwen - I had to smile at this! If you knew me in real life you'd realise that a sainthood is one of the last things I'd qualify for, especially where MIL is concerned!! I think over the 21 years I've been with hubby I've learned to 'bite my tongue' mostly with MIL (although we do have our moments), I do sometimes wonder if I fully realised just what we're letting ourselves in for, although we're rather committed now to living together - interesting times ahead I forsee;) .

misty-moodles

meanmarie wrote: »

I live in the house where my great grandmother was born...and the amount of 'stuff' here is incredible. I had intended to leave the whole lot for my (7) children to fight over after I die, but have decided that, starting in June on my birthday...well won't be here for that but my wedding anniversary is in July: I am going to offer the pick of something in the house to each of my children, in chronological order. In my opinion very little of what I had has more than sentimental value so there will not be a financial gain to one over the other and I feel that each will not have a problem taking one thing and I will get rid of some of my clutter without making a decision on what to give to whom myself. Does anyone think that this is a good idea?

Marie

Hello Marie, I think this is a really good idea, and a very practical solution to the 'stuff' problem. Like ceridwen says I would try to avoid leaving them to 'fight over' who gets what, I've heard of so many family disputes arising over who gets what (not that I'm implying that yours would fall out), it just might make it easier all round;)

ceridwen

'Morning all simplifiers - and the declutterers over on the decluttering thread

Do you think they've noticed? The charity shops that is - as I've been walking past them the last few days I've noticed various posters and signs etc going up to the effect of "are you decluttering? Can we have it please?" and I opened my newspaper this morning (Tuesday's - I am a bit behind here with my newspaper reading) and theres a charity advert (British Heart Foundation) with the same request.

Is it something we said?

Oh well.....better get on with the springcleaning then....who knows - there might be a bit more heading their way in a mo:D

Have a good Easter all - and not too much of the Easter Eggs - otherwise, it could be a bit of body decluttering (aka a diet) after Easter:rotfl:

:easter:

Rowan9

Morning folks
I've taken some time to read through the last few pages more carefully and see that there are so many caring people on this thread
((((caring people))))
Since I started the clear out of my stuff and clutter I can honestly say that the thought of starting it, and the actual starting itself, was the hardest part. Now I am really enjoying finding things to give away. I feel much freer in myself and know that I am taking responsibility for my own stuff. I have started asking the kids (23 and 21) about things they might want and have already given a couple of things to them. I'm also, as I said earlier, using things that were previously 'too nice' and 'too precious' to use. And it has been great and it has been really good for me.
I can't wait to go up the loft again today but my son is back from uni for Easter weekend and is asleep in the room with loft access - don't suppose, as a student, he is likely to surface for quite a while
In the meantime, I am going to search some lovely inspirational sites on the internet and have another cup of tea.
Hope it isn't too wild and windy where you all are
w

bails

Hello everyone :hello: :o:o:o:o

What can I say? Decluttering my life is something I find incredibly hard, and so have been avoiding it and therefore you! It is really important that I do it though so I'm back, again, shamefaced and hopeful that I can start do a few little things that will snowball into a decluttering torrent

I've got 3 free days now and I'm committing to doing a few things to kickstart the process. I can only do a little as I'm pretty tired but better than nowt!

I hope you are all well and feeling the benefits of simplifying your lives. I want to catch up on what I've missed but not now, as that would stop me getting on with it

do_it_today!

Hi all :hello:
it's nice and sunny down in south east london at the mo - so will crack on with
an hour of cleaning
sorting some bills
doing some coursework
checking on seeds at allotment
and cake baking when mum comes round

enjoy your day :j

Aril

Hello virtual friends:j and a very :easter_os to you all!
As for me one flake down and maybe more to go:o
I've hit freecycle today and offered yet another item the small person has decluttered. He's dead chuffed because he received an unused stamp album from freecycle this week as he announced he'd like to collect stamps last week. There's now much muttering from downstairs as he tries to get those little sticky things to stick both on the back and the front of the stamp. Quite an art I seem to recall:D The weather here is glorious so it looks like I shall have to tackle his large sandpit. The intention is to clean it out and then freecycle it [fingers crossed]. OH and the small person meanwhile are going to be planting veggie seeds and putting them out in the new greenhouse they put up at half term. I've been putting it off but it looks like I've run out of excuses...it's either that or finish the kitchen cupboards. Perhaps I'll leave that delight for Easter Monday:rolleyes:
A couple of short quotes today to leave you with:
Happiness is in the task, not in the thing. And we are made happy by possessing what we ourselves love, not what others think lovely.
Roche Focault [I suppose this could be applied to all of you looking at the inherited items you have in your houses]
God gave us memories so that we might have roses in December.
James Barrie.
Hope you all have a good well earned rest this Easter.
Aril