Follow the Yellow Brick Road 2023

KajiKita

SandyShores said:

KajiKita said:

Well I have another of ‘those jobs’ that I need to do … (updating my CV) which is weighing on my mind, so although I was going to give myself two weeks off completely I think I will start it in the coming week, especially as the forecast is naff! I will aim to get that and my statement to go with the green ring on LI done before I go on holiday, so they are both ready to use when I get home from holiday. 

We will be ‘chunking’ together 😊 (that will sound so bad to strangers coming across this thread ….! 😉😂) I hope your chunking goes well 😊

KK

Hope you managing to get chunking.  I've been a bit quiet as not much chunking was going on here.  Then I picked up a pen and paper this morning and broke it down into 'chunks'.  Returned to it this evening and tackled each chunk with the help of the tinterweb and AI.  The final chunk is to check things through with MrShores and then press the button.  Woohoo!  That's gone really well :

I have chunked a bit but got a bit derailed by feeling a bit ill today ….

Well done on your chunking! 👏😊🤩🎉🥳

KK

SandyShores

Thanks @KajiKita its only one task of many, but it is definitely a frog that needs eating and I've just one leg to finish nibbling on.  More frogs to go after, but I've made a start and it feels good.

savingholmes

Well done. 

My main feats of today were....

Doing the dishwasher. Wiping the soil off the counters from Sunday's playing with houseplant repotting. Tiny bit of hoovering in the kitchen. Emptying the cat litter tray. Trying to do my day job... 

Sometimes even ticking one item off feels like a huge win. I hope you remember to celebrate your progress and not just rush on to the next thing.

SandyShores

Definitely agree savingholmes, sometimes I give myself a pat on the back just for getting through a fairly ordinary day.  

I used to be zealous about keeping the house clean and tidy, but realised it was a never ending hamster wheel.  So these days I focus on putting things away and keeping surfaces clear.  I like everything to have a home and if its not used regularly I'm trying to make sure its donated/sold/thrown.    My main tactic is to just not buy things - the thought of finding space at home for new  purchases puts me off - that's mainly down to SDC because you create a space for things and if that space is full you can't buy anything more until you make a space for it.

SandyShores

I've been saving Asda Advantage points and now have over £40 in the xmas cash pot.  We aren't huge spenders at this time of year, but I found it handy last year for buying those obligatory boxes of wine or chocolates.  I've also managed to build up almost £20 of Morrisons fivers and I'll save those until Nov/Dec too so I don't have to dip into the household funds.  

I've been trying to deal with some additional spending MrShores has been hiding.  We've had another frank conversation and I'll need to keep an eye on it.  We'll be remortaging next year and secret loans are the last thing I need to be dealing with.  Its fairly small amounts in the scheme of things, but I'll be keeping an eye on it and at xmas we'll be sitting down and having a re-set and new approach.  Strangely I'm not panicking about it, but we are N.O.T. going back to the days of living on CCs - he understands that, but his light bulb moment wasn't as good as I thought.  Hopefully this is just a blip.

Meantime, here in Mrs Shore's grown up world I've got a lovely day to myself today so have planned some shopping and some gardening.

SandyShores

Had a lovely day today.  Lots of popping into little shops and having a browse then popping back again for purchases.  Also did some gardening and a bit of sewing - made a draught excluder out of of fabric from the stash and stuffing from an old pillow.  Looks good (even though I do say so myself) and saved at least a tenner.  Had a great bargain from FB too, so going into the new week feeling refreshed and ever so slightly smug

KajiKita

Do you know what is driving Mr Shores spending and why he is being secretive about it? 

If it makes you feel any better I discovered that Mr KK had a ‘secret’ CC debt when we were buying this place that I found out about right at the end of the mortgage approval process …! 😳 In that case he was so ashamed and upset with himself there really wasn’t much I could say - I made him ask my mother for the money to pay it off - very tough for him …. The striking thing for me, was it showed him how easily CCs ‘run away with you’ …. A life lesson for him. 

KK

SandyShores

Thanks @KajiKita, yes that does make me feel better thank you for sharing.  

MrShores also had a 'secret' CC debt before we bought this place, similar situation.  So its really disappointing that he seems to have forgotten how borrowing to pay for stuff you've already enjoyed is a slippery slope. 

He had been allowed a CC again to make the most of points etc, but we are going to get rid of that and he's going cash only going forward.  I think he'd borrowed to get out of the CC debt, built up because he was being overgenerous and just overspending each month.  I know how easy it is to get into that situation because I got myself to a point recently where almost all my personal spend was going to pay off the CC.  Now I pay off each spend every time I use the card.  The trouble is MrShores spends his personal money so he has no reserves - its like the money is burning a hole in his pocket so he has to get rid of it - not sure how to change that about him its definitely family history repeating itself.

KajiKita

Oh dear …. I can see how  having it happen twice would be very discouraging…. Is he open to talking about it? 

Could Mr Shore be encouraged to start doing surveys (often better earnings for men as they are rarer subjects on those sites), selling stuff etc so he can a) earn some extra spending money and b) understand how long it takes to earn / appreciate what he has more? 

KK

SandyShores

Thanks for the suggestion Kajikita, I'm not sure that would work.  Its taken me ages to convince him to use points cards and save receipts for me.  He's a bit of a champagne lifestyle on a lemonade budget type of person.  He could never admit to being on a budget and would rather go into debt than have people think he has to watch the pennies.  I think maybe some professional help might work or I might threaten to go public with our mortgage amount!